Greetings, readers! Here at the Tanki Online Newspaper, we are passionate about providing you with information on all the latest updates, turrets, hulls, maps, contests or just about anything related to the community or game; and you can trust us to cover it all. I would just like to say sorry By @Yisroel.Rabin Yesterday, I made fun of a Magnum who couldn't aim straight and kept missing me. I was trying to be funny, to entertain those around me, that's always my goal. But I was being insensitive and inconsiderate. I didn't look at the whole picture, I thought he was just a noob. Had I known it was his first time playing Tanki, and he was just playing on his brothers account, I would have never called him a kid with his mom's credit card. I regret my actions and would like to publicly state my recognition of the problem, and my new aim of joining the solution. I pledge to donate to all the major and minor groups spreading awareness to cyber bulling, starting with donating 1 000 000 crystals to the #AllAreEqual movement, which have done a miraculous job at stopping bullying in online games and across all the internet. Whether you play XP, or use M1 Smoky and the noobiest paint, you deserve equality, and don't let my past actions convince you otherwise. I've changed, and I know understand and acknowledge my mistakes, and have done all I can to rid those mistakes from my personality. I ask for your forgiveness. My goal is to entertain. Shocking News: Black Boxes Have Left The Building... and Tanki By @Flexoo The Black Boxes caused a stir when they first appeared during The Black Friday and then again during the New Year celebrations. Hunters have enjoyed the chilling agitation of capturing a black box that may contain something valuable. Everyone was happy and nothing in the world could go wrong. Later, development announced that Black Boxes are here to stay and that you will be able to rarely spot them gliding instead of Gold Boxes. However, no one knew that rarely will freely translate to, well, never. Since these big celebrations, black boxes literally hit the road. Muerto, Finito, Arivederci, Astalavista. A few thousand players claimed they indeed saw something closely resembling the black box, but our double Perm agent confirmed these players are mere dummy accounts used for controling the minds and views of unaware players. Based on all the (gossip) *EDIT* evidence, we confronted one of the lead developers who agreed on interview directly in his residence. Here's what he got to say; "Yeap, I am behind all these ingenious ideas and I have never been more proud of myself. It all started with this awesome Synesthesia Code that was awkwardly illogical, and upon cracking it, awarded *WAIT FOR IT* absolutely NOTHING. It was a huge hit and so I decided to step up the game with hoax about the Black Boxes with drop rate so small that atom looks like giant truck compared to it. I got plenty more tricks up my sleeve, so get ready for more because you can't do nothing about it." Well, someone's bursting with confidence! We certainly hope this newly-found confidence won't abandon the unnamed developer even when we leak his address to the angry crowds. American Rugby Federation protests against Tanki's new rugby mode By @Yisroel.Rabin With the buzz of a new 'Rugby' mode going around our tankers, a very important influence took a stand. The American Rugby Federation president, @Maf, released a statement yesterday, basically saying such a game mode is a direct attack on his federation and the sport as a whole. "The idea of a Rugby mode is a deliberate butchering of our sport. They're taking our wonderful game and turning it into a virtual game, where all you exercise is your ability to burn brain cells. It's outright attack, coming to steal all young aspiring athletes, and migrating them to a computer game. I call for a boycott of the new mode and demand an immediate response from the Tanki Administration." And what makes this all the more crazy is ' response. I guess we're doomed. Nives publicly outed as gay for the 949458585839th time By @Marc Another Livestream, another public announcement. Sergei continues to persist with his whole 'negative reinforcement' scheme, insisting that he is gay, in a bid to make us believe that he isn't. Sorry, Sergei, your plan isn't working. Destraught Lord of the Rings fan explains what 'my precious' really means By @Destrod After the destruction of the One Ring and it's evil master Sauron with it, all lay quiet in the peaceful realm of middle-Earth. Or did it? A die hard Gandalf fan found a rather peculiar figure in the clutching depths of Zone: This horrid creature has been feeding off noob xp/bp players who fall into this ditch, hence his malnutrition and sordid figure. When the LoTR enthusiast was questioned about his encounter, he began his boring and painfully long story of how he stumbled upon the ring lover: " I was taking a stroll near the bridge, and I heard a very peculiar noise, so I looked down and there lay Gollum, depressed and weak, I felt like the moment I've awaited my entire life had come. I asked " What business does a cursed hobbit have in the Zonemark?" " It must leave us! Not it's business, filthy Veteran player pushes us into this pit! gollum, gollum" " The wise and all-powerful Reporter team ought to know what to do with you!" So I brought him here." Gollum is currently being dissected and scraped for parts, to sustain my master Flexoo look for precious items, and it is here that we find the twist in J.R.R.Tolkien's story. Gollum's precious was not the ring, but a decade old piece of a half eaten Big Mac. No wonder it drove him mad, it's finger lickin' good! Or was that the other.....nevermind. I'm terrible with names. Rugby Mode … a catastrophic failure By @Marc Rugby Mode has not been in the game for long, but tankers' violent tendency levels seem to have skyrocketed. Highly qualified scientists hypothesize that this is likely due to the amount of tankosterone being released as a result of the implementation of the hyped Rugby Mode. The competitive nature is also expected to cause an influx of discrimination, as the unfit, heavy hulls keep getting outrun by the nimble light hulls. Yisroel.Rabin diagnosed with ADHD By @Yisroel.Rabin That explains everything. If you want to read more from The Dictator, here are the news reports from previous months! The Dictator Issues - July 2014 - August 2014 - September 2014 - October 2014 - November 2014 - January 2015 - February 2015 - March 2015 - August 2015 - December 2015 - January 2016 - February 2017 - March 2017 - April 2017 - May 2017 - June 2017 - July 2017 - September 2017 - October 2017 - November 2017 - December 2017 - January 2018 The Dictator Specials - The Dictator Special | Origins of Nives

If you mean to ask where we type our articles, the answer would be in a secret hidden laboratory underground far away in Africa.

:lol:

Bribe. :v His nickname is CRY5TAL.

I cried.

I'm not saying anyone on the list isn't deserving, but I'm saying there are people who aren't on the list who are deserving. Congratulations to all the valuable helpers and players out there who help make this community what it is.

I'm running out of stuff to buy. I'm gonna start MUing pretty soon. :P On my main I got Hunter M3. Don't need it too much, but why not buy it? xD On my alt I got Hornet M1, and absolute essential!

What. :huh:

Thank you Hazel, for reminding me summer is still so far away.

Nah, they can't fire me.

I know dis feel mayn. :c

He will be back, don't you worry. EDIT: He is back.*

Yisroel is offended. Will work on not being lame. :P

Guides | Reviews | Interviews | Other & Entertainment | Stories | Parkour | Contests & Results Keywords: Memory, Warphare, Between Tabs, Story Behind Colors, Remnant, Smoky XT Chronicles. [/th] MEMORY AUTHOR 54 55 56 60 61 Memory Memory Pt.2 Memory Pt.3 Memory Pt.4 Memory Pt.5 @tweezers WARPHARE AUTHOR 40 42 43 44 45 48 50 Warphare: Psychological Warphare: Interpersonal Warphare: Internal Warphare: Practical Warphare: Final Warphare: Supernatural Warphare: Digital @sonofchrysalis3 SMOKY XT CHRONICLES AUTHOR 01 02 03 04 05 06 07 08 Smoky XT Chronicles: Discovery Smoky XT Chronicles: Domination Smoky XT Chronicles: Escape Smoky XT Chronicles: The Journey Smoky XT Chronicles: Due Stories Smoky XT Chronicles: Attack Smoky XT Chronicles: Exploration Smoky XT Chronicles: Confrontation @Tommy60 IF DRUGS WERE ILLEGAL... AUTHOR 12 13 14 16 18 If Drugs Were Illegal, Segment 1: The Announcement If Drugs Were Illegal, Segment 2: The Reaction If Drugs Were Illegal, Segment 3: The Discovery If Drugs Were Illegal, Segment 4: The Realization If Drugs Were Illegal, Segment 5: Meanwhile, In Russia @jokjinari STORY - GOLDROCK, AOJSD AUTHOR 12 13 14 16 Part 1: The Attack Part 2: The Counter-Attack Part 3: The Climax Part 4: Conclusion @GoldRock @GoldRock @GoldRock @aojsd BIRTH OF A TANK AUTHOR 16 17 18 19 20 Birth of a Tank Birth of a Tank: "Rachel" Birth of a Tank: "Combat Training" Birth of a Tank: "Patrol Duty" Birth of a Tank: "Breaking the Silence" @Fjelstad1678 THE GREAT COMEBACK AUTHOR 17 18 19 20 The Great Comeback: "The Russian Project" The Great Comeback: "The Prototype" The Great Comeback: "Testing Grounds" The Great Comeback: "Flaw" @Fjelstad1678 THE REVOLUTION AUTHOR 12 13 14 [issue 12] [story] The Revolution [issue 13] [story] The Revolution - Part 2 [issue 14] [story] The Revolution, Part 3 - The End @Meliora THE CRISIS AUTHOR 15 16 17 The Crisis - Part 1 The Crisis - Part 2 The Crisis - Finale @Valletta WAR OF THE SERVERS AUTHOR 03 04 War of the Servers - Part 1 War of the Servers - Part 2 @chriswu DARIEN'S CHRONICLE AUTHOR 11 12 Darien's Chronicle: Part 1, The Journey. Darien's Chronicle: Part 2, The Labyrinth @r_SwagBoy110 THE OVERSEER AUTHOR 13 14 The Overseer The Overseer, Part 2 - The Race @Meliora THEFT AT THE FACTORY AUTHOR 16 17 Theft at the Factory - Part 1 Theft at the Factory - Part 2 @Vikingsrallentando THE LIFE OF ROWAN BLACKWELL AUTHOR 28 29 The life of Rowan Blackwell (Part 1) The life of Rowan Blackwell (Part 2) @Remaine REMNANT AUTHOR 28 29 30 31 32 33 Remnant - Part 1 Remnant - Part 2 Remnant - Part 3 Remnant - Part 4 Remnant - Part 5 Remnant - Part 6 @Remaine CRIMSON BLADES/TITANCORE/DAWN OF WAR/FORWARD AUTHOR 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 The Crimson Blades - Part 1 The Crimson Blades - Part 2 The Crimson Blades - Part 3 The Titancore - Part 1 The Titancore - Part 2 Dawn of War - Part 1 Dawn of War - Part 2 Forward - Part 1 Forward - Part 2 @Kevred THE STORY BEHIND THE COLORS AUTHOR 32 33 34 35 36 37 The Story Behind the Colors: Storm The Story Behind the Colors: Sakura The Story Behind the Colors: Prodigi The Story Behind the Colors: Tiger The Story Behind the Colors: Swash The Story Behind the Colors: Helper (Part 1 of 2) @Kevred BETWEEN TABS AUTHOR 33 34 35 36 37 41 55 56 58 60 63 Between Tabs - Part I Between Tabs - Part II Between Tabs - Part III Between Tabs - Part IV Between Tabs - Part V Between Tabs - Part VI Between Tabs - Part VII Between Tabs - Part VIII Between Tabs - Part IX Between Tabs - Part X Between Tabs - Epilogue @Shedinja DECAY AUTHOR 33 34 35 Decay - Part 1 Decay - Part 2 Decay - Part 3 @S.C.Y.T.H.E WEATHER AUTHOR 33 34 35 Weather - Part 1 Weather - Part 2 Weather - Part 3 @mcmonkey25 [th]FEAR THE NIPAH AUTHOR 78 79 Fear The Nipah Fear The Nipah: Targeted @LOLKILLERTOTHEDEATH [/td][td] Do you have any suggestions for the Newspaper Archive? Leave them in the Newspaper Suggestions topic!

Guides | Reviews | Interviews | Other & Entertainment | Stories | Parkour | Contests & Results Keywords: Editorials, World News [/th] THE TANKER'S POST AUTHOR 11 12 13 14 16 The Tanker's Post: First Edition The Tanker's Post: Second Edition The Tanker's Post: Third Edition The Tanker's Post: Fourth Edition The Tanker's Post: Fifth Edition @SpreadLoveNotHate @SpreadLoveNotHate @SpreadLoveNotHate @SpreadLoveNotHate @SpreadLoveNotHate EDITORIALS AUTHOR 19 21 30 31 31 32 33 36 37 39 Editorials Editorials Editorials Editorials Editorials: The Submissions Editorials Editorials Editorials Editorials Editorials @Raphael2 @Raphael2 @Remaine @Remaine @Remaine @Remaine @Remaine @Remaine @Remaine @Remaine [/td] Entertainment Keywords: The Dictator - News Source, The Adventures of a Nublet, Dictator Academy Students. THE DICTATOR - TANKI'S FINEST NEWS SOURCE AUTHOR 25 26 27 28 29 32 33 38 47 61 62 63 64 65 66 67 68 68 69 70 71 72 73 75 76 77 The Dictator: Tanki's Finest News Source The Dictator: Tanki's Finest News Source - August The Dictator: Tanki's Finest News Source - September The Dictator: Tanki's Finest News Source - October The Dictator: Tanki's Finest News Source - November The Dictator: Tanki's Finest News Source - February The Dictator: Tanki's Finest News Source - March The Dictator: Tanki's Finest News Source - August The Dictator: Tanki's Finest News Source - January [Other] The Dictator - Tanki's Finest News Source - February '17 [Other] The Dictator - Tanki's Finest News Source - March '17 [Other] The Dictator - Tanki's Finest News Source - April '17 [Other] The Dictator - Tanki's Finest News Source - May '17 [Other] The Dictator - Tanki's Finest News Source - June '17 [Other] The Dictator - Tanki's Finest News Source - July '17 [Other] The Dictator - Tanki's Finest News Source - September '17 [Other] The Dictator - Tanki's Finest News Source - October '17 [Other] The Dictator Special | Origin of Nives [Other] The Dictator - Tanki's Finest News Source - November '17 [Other] The Dictator - Tanki's Finest News Source - December '17 [Other] The Dictator - Tanki's Finest News Source - January '18 [Other] The Dictator - Tanki's Finest News Source - February '18 [Other] The Dictator - Tanki's Finest News Source - March '18 [Other] The Dictator - Tanki's Finest News Source - May '18 [Other] The Dictator - Tanki's Finest News Source - June '18 [Other] The Dictator - Tanki's Finest News Source - July '18 @GoldRock @GoldRock & @hogree @GoldRock & @hogree @GoldRock & @hogree @hogree @hogree @hogree @Contradiction @Contradiction @Yisroel.Rabin @Yisroel.Rabin @Yisroel.Rabin @Yisroel.Rabin @Yisroel.Rabin @Yisroel.Rabin @Yisroel.Rabin @Yisroel.Rabin @Yisroel.Rabin @Yisroel.Rabin @Yisroel.Rabin @Yisroel.Rabin @Yisroel.Rabin @Yisroel.Rabin @Yisroel.Rabin @Yisroel.Rabin @Yisroel.Rabin DICTATOR ACADEMY STUDENTS (DAS) AUTHOR 47 49 51 Dictator Academy Students (DAS) Dictator Academy Students (DAS) - Month 2 Dictator Academy Students (DAS) - Month 3 @Fen-Harel @Fen-Harel @Fen-Harel [th]THE ADVENTURES OF A NUBLET AUTHOR 44 46 50 The Adventures of a Nublet The Adventures of a Nublet: A Compleat Guide to Forum Trolling The Adventures of a Nublet: A Comprehensive Guide to Ping Pong @Night-Sisters @Night-Sisters @Night-Sisters [td] Do you have any suggestions for the Newspaper Archive? Leave them in the Newspaper Suggestions topic!

#Repost

Oh hello there. What brings you to the Amateur Writing Section? :^)

Noob, why post garbage here when you could post it in the newspaper and get paid tons of Teddy Bear gifts off it?

Would it be a good idea to bring back the ability to search a friends name who's in your friends list already?

Looks like behaviour out there is becoming even more toxic.

Too bad you didn't conquer ALL the subsections. :ph34r:

You feel wrong. You're forgetting the fact that I'm 10 times worse than older Dictator writers.

It's that time of year again; New Year's! Come and join me as I dive through the past years of New Year celebrations, try and speculate what will happen this year, and ask a handful of community members what they want this Christmas from Tanki! _____________________________________________________________________________ History of New Year's in Tanki Online 2010 Not much happened the first time Tanki celebrated New Year's. All that happened was turrets sprayed confetti, but that's all. 2011 The second time around was a bit more notable than the last. Tanki changed the flags to look like Christmas trees, crystal and supply boxes looked like wrapped presents falling from the sky with a decorated parachute. Billboards were also changed to fit the festivities. The New Year map was basically Boombox, only with a giant tree in the centre instead of a building. Crystal boxes often rained around the tree. There was also a dark blue holiday paint with bright lights on it as decorations. The 2011 New Year's celebration Holiday paint. The festivities lasted until November 3rd. 2012 On December 31st of 2011, the Developers decorated the game with classic Christmas decorations. The special Holiday paint remained the same as the previous year's paint. The special map was based off the modern day Sandbox, except it had no walls to block players from falling off the edge, so players fell off a lot. There was a big Christmas tree in the centre, where crystal boxes dropped more often. During the celebrations, there was a 'New Year's Quest', which was basically an older version of 'The GAME'; a series of riddles which players needed to solve to get to the final answer. The winners of a the '20 Seconds To New Year' and 'TO Postcards' contests had the privilege of testing out a fun new turret called 'Snowman'. It had the same rotation speed as Smoky (back then) and looked like this. 2013 Ah, the first New Year's celebrations after the rebalance, which happened only a few days earlier, on December 17th, 2012. There were discounts from December 30th until January 2nd. There was an icy looking Holiday paint in honour of the holidays. The 2011 New Year's celebration Holiday paint. The special map was different this year, rather than a simple copy of other maps. It was a yard with a hill in the centre, with four ramps on either side to climb the hill. The ramps were topped with banners, three saying 'Happy New Year!' in different languages, and one saying 'tankionline.com'. At the top of the hill was the annual Christmas tree, where present-like boxes rained. There were two kinds of Gold Boxes throughout the celebrations, one worth 100 crystals, and another worth 200 crystals. The special gold boxes which fell during the 2013 New Year celebrations. 2014 2014's New Year celebrations was the first one I personally ever experienced, so I could dive deeper into them. Semyon Kirov was the Community Manager back then, and I remember a video he made for the community thanking them for such a good year: Gold Boxes were increased up to 3000 crystals, as well as another gold box worth 2014 crystals. The game was decorated once more with special flags, billboards, and boxes getting a new holiday themed look. I remember tons of golds, and ending up with around 90 000 crystals, which was a crazy amount for my rank. I remember bragging to my real life friends, who thought I was hacking. The special gold boxes which fell during the 2014 New Year celebrations. Starting from December 24th, new toys were added to the Garage each day, leading up to the 30th. Players had to buy them each day to get a special prize before the toy disappeared the next day. I remember buying every single one. All the toys players had to buy to get a special prize. Cost: 100 crystals per toy. There was a 50% slash on all items in the garage excluding product kits, which lasted until January 2nd. To end off the festivities, The GAME was introduced to Tanki Online. The New Year map was what most people know today as the 'Aleksandrovsk' map. However, Tanki didn't base their New Year map off Aleksandrovsk, they based Aleksandrovsk off the New Year map. It was first introduced in a winter night mode, which a large Christmas tree in the centre, which is replaced in the Aleksandrovsk map buy a tower. The map was showered with amazing feedback, so the developers brought back the map the next Near Year's celebration (along with another map), before eventually just sticking it into the game permanently as Aleksandrovsk. There was of course a special holiday paint, which was a dark royal blue background with a bunch of snowflakes on it. The paint was later available for purchase for real money in a special holiday bundle and was renamed 'Snowflake'. 2015 The 2015 New Year's celebration started on December 24th, and being Hammer was only just added to the game a few weeks before, the Developers had to give a great discount on it. There were 50% off sales on all items in the garage. Here's what the calendar looked like. • Turrets sales | December 24 • Hulls sales | December 25 • Paints sale | December 26 • Supplies and Passes sale | December 27 • 50% off Micro-Upgrades and 80% off Speed-Ups | December 28 • Double Battle Funds | December 29 - December 31 • Gold Boxes valued at 2015 crystals dropping | January 1st - January 3rd • A New Year racing map | January 1st - January 3rd • A New Year Quest | January 1st - January 7th The New Year Racing map. The New Year Racing map was introduced to the game on December 31st, and stayed in the game until January 15th. Although it supported all game modes, it was meant for CP. Players were meant to spawn at the starting points and race to the one CP point at the top to capture it. The map was very large and had many obstacles along the way to the top. The special gold box which fell during the 2015 New Year celebrations. The 2015 New Year Holiday paint, which was later introduced to the garage as 'Sweater'. But let's not forget the cool 'Frost' paint. 2015 was the year the 'Frost' paint was introduced to the game. But it wasn't just some 650 000 crystal paint. It was special. It was available for rent along with Railgun and Hornet XT (which was also available for rent at any modification). The XTs had better perimeters than their originals, and the Frost paint had 20% protection against all turrets, as well as mines. 2016 The New Year map for 2016 was a decorated version of the Yorkshire map, which was added to the game this past year with the introduction of the Matchmaking System. It also came with a new game mode, Assault, which has also since been added to the game as an official game mode. Special Daily Missions such as 'Earn experience points on the New Year map' and 'Catch New Year Gold Boxes'. New Year 2016 was the first time 'Gifts' entered the game. There were four gifts which you were able to send your friends in the garage; a 'Christmas Tree', a 'Snowman', a 'Smoky+Wasp', and a 'Christmas Toy' gold box. Gifts which were available in the Garage during the 2016 New Year's celebrations. There was also a colourful gold box worth 2016 crystals. And besides the standard holiday paint, which was a red background with white snowflakes, the classic premium account paint also got switched to a nice light blue paint. The 'Holiday' paint and the 'Premium Account' paint during the 2016 New Year festivities. 2017 Last year's celebrations last from December 25th all the way until January 29th! The event was accompanied by the annual decorations. Flags, parachutes, boxes, and trees and pushes were all decorated for the holidays. Gold Boxes looked the same as they had the previous year, though. There were three Gifts released for the celebrations; a 'Candy Cane', a 'Snow Globe', and a 'Gingerbread Cookie'. Gifts which were available in the Garage during the 2016 New Year's celebrations. There were also three new paints available. Tankers had the opportunity to buy the Holiday paint to keep even after the event was over, which costed 150,000 crystals. Tankers also had the option to purchase to special Shop paints; 'Spangles' and 'Snowflake', which was a copy of 2014's holiday paint (as mentioned above). The 'Holiday' paint during the 2017 New Year celebrations, as well as Spangles and Snowflake. The was an improved version of the previous' year's map. There were now two Assault points (as appose to one), and three flags (as appose to one). The map was also much larger than the original, and hence had room for more spawn zones, drop zones, and more dynamic routes. The additions of two new reg flags proves successful, and now not everyone was crowding around one flag. The map was available to play on in DM, TDM, and ASL. A view of the improved New Year map of 2017. Expectations For This Year Now that we've went through a brief history of every New Year celebration in Tanki Online, and using our own intuition, let's speculate over what will happen this year! Themed Decorations and Special Map Well, there's obviously going to be themed decorations. I'm assuming the Developers will just reuse the old decorated bushes and trees. Billboards will definitely have the banner on them, and I don't know if there'll be a new design different from previous years, but boxes will also definitely get a makeover. I'm hoping for a new original map, seeing there's no point in having the old one from the past two years, seeing we have Yorkshire now. We probably will get some sort of new map, and I hope it isn't based on another existing map. There'll most probably be some benefit of playing on the map during the celebrations, like higher funds or gold boxes, but that's a discussion for later. For some reason, in the last celebration with a special map, which was Halloween, the Developers didn't let players create their own game on the map. I hope they reconsider that this time around and allow us to create New Year maps. Discounts and Sales Seeing this is the biggest event f the year, discounts are undoubtedly going to be, but the question is, how big of a discount are we getting? I'm expecting a 50% off discount on all Garage items (except for Product Kits) including Micro Upgrades, and probably the classic 70% off discount on Speed-Ups, as well as a big discount going on in the Shop. Discounts will probably be spread throughout the days of the event; turrets on one day, hulls on another, and so on. Gold Boxes 2018. Gold boxes worth 2018 crystals are a guarantee. They might not be around for the duration of the entire event, but they probably will rain in the New Year map on New Year's day and maybe a few days after that. Besides for that, the regular gold boxes as well as the special ones will undoubtedly be decorated just like the rest of the boxes which will fall throughout the festivities. Special Offer Like with every other big event, there will most probably be a version of the Holiday paint available for purchase in the Garage, for what I assume will be 120 000 crystals. Besides that, there will probably be some special bundle in the shop, where you can get a cool paint (which'll probably be animated this time around). Other Exclusive Features Special Daily Mission are going to be a thing for sure. Harder missions like 'Earn 3000 experience points on the New Year map' with bigger prizes such as Gold Boxes (or crystals for the lower ranks). Containers have recently become an essential part of celebrations, so I'm expecting there to be Containers up for grabs as well. Another addition to The GAME will for sure roll out, so sharpen your mind if you plan to participate. Players' Opinions Now that I'm done rambling, let's here the thoughts of some of the community's well known players! Question 1 Based on past years experiences, what do you think this year's New Year's celebration will be like? Question 2 Was there anything you had in previous years that you particularly liked, and would like to see in this year's celebrations? @Magenta Question 1 What will this new year be like? Well, you see, it all depends on the paint, the map and the Gold skin. If those are good (last year was awesomous-o-saurus), there will be a festive environment. The chat will be full of 'Happy new year!' and gifts will fly. But if the map is not good, if the paint is ugly, the gold skin is re-used - stuff which we can proudly rely on Alternativa to do - the chat will be full of 'Tanki P2W :'(. If the map is eye-dazzling and so is the paint and the Gold skin, there will be rank up parties and Gold rains, most of which will go to YouTube, and that's business for Tanki and a happy time for Tankers. What I'm saying is, I expect ugly stuff, but I hope for good stuff. It all depends on Hazel now. Question 2 Hmm, I would like to see this counter go soaring again, like it used to in the glory days. Without enough people to celebrate with, no celebration suffices. Answering as you expect me to, well, it will be good to see the containers dropping again, but admin pls remuv 125 speed pls kthnx kys we peeps with 125kbps internet don't wanna lag on potato computers (no offense, leader potato) and catch Gold with difficulty only to get 125 speed no pls thnx kys. 'Tis my death which, please, remove the x125 speeds from the containers. NOTE BY REPORTER: .-. @Marc Question 1 Well, if I'm being honest and blunt, I'm expecting a really cool New Year's Map with pretty stale gameplay; that's how it's been most of the time. The sales are usually awesome, increased Gold Boxes (usually equivalent to the approaching year) and some new props/festive decorations. I'd love to see heightened funds and Gold Box drops over the course of a few days (hopefully even a few weeks :x). Question 2 I've liked the fact that there's usually a custom Map for the celebrations, I'd like that but since they've really pushed the case for Yorkshire, a watered down version of the old New Year's Map, I'm not really expecting a new one, simply remaining hopeful. I'm also really hyped for THE GAME, that's pretty much the best thing about the festivities in my opinion. :D @Penguin40 Question 1 I don't really know to be honest. Pretty easy to expect containers or more Gold Boxes, decorations (obviously), special missions and a New Year map. Also special contests! And a special Newspaper! (Wait isn't that what I'm talking for?) And since Assault's in permanently, there could be a brand new mode. It would be nice to have some new stuff we haven't seen before, but I doubt that. Question 2 Anyone remember 2014's XT Hornet, Railgun and Frost paint renting? Or the racetrack map in the same year? I really miss that map. If only they'd do something similar to that, 'cause that was one fun map. Maybe they'd make a similar one? Heh, one can dream. _____________________________________________________________________________ That concludes this piece. I hope you enjoyed it as much as I enjoyed writing it. Tell me what you think in the comments down bellow. While you're at it, also tell us what your plans are for this New Year.

The whole team gathered around the fireplace in the Newspaper HQ. We all stayed there, obviously, because Reporters never have time to stop doing mindless work, even on New Year's. Besides, none of us really care about our families, because, like I mentioned, we all are mindless robots under the 3vil Administration of Flexbot and Vikingsrall. Nevertheless, we did manage to convince our 3vil Overlords to give us a break and let us have some fun during New Year's. Reporter HQ, Washington, D.C., 2017 @Thekillerpenguin was the only one still working. He claimed to be "temporarily unavailable", but we all knew he just wanted that Helper of the Month reward and the cool purple paint that comes with it. Sitting in the biggest arm chair was @Hexed, who was gazing at everyone else, trying to figure out just what exactly we were all doing. I'm not sure if he caught me picking my nose, I tried to play it off as a mere itch of my nose, but I don't think I did a really convincing job. I think he also finally realized that he was hanging out with a bunch of losers when @Destrod and @Flexoo started laughing really loudly at what most probably was some overly-used totally un-funny joke which was probably about another Reporter in the room. In fact, it was probably me. Louring in the far corner of the room was none other than @tweezers, who was undoubtedly coming up with yet another evil plan to overthrow the 3vil Administrators and eventually, somehow, become the Almighty Ruler of the Tankiverse. Although that may sound like a totally cool and anti-social thing to do, like something an evil sociopath would do, especially at a time like this, it really isn't. Well, it isn't if you're tweezers, anyway. I wouldn't be surprised if the plan code name this time around was simply 'Plan #ZZZ.ZZX', because I think that's what he's up to at this point. He once tried fill to Flexoo's office with melted cheese to the brim in a failed attempt to drown Flexoo in it. Foolproof, except for the fact that Flexoo was in the washroom while the office was being flooded. Then came @Blackdrakon30, who was trying to be overly social this year, being he was moving around constantly, switching seats and being a part of just about every conversation at once. I kept my distance, I was never really the social type. Besides, Drakon was scaring me with his overly social attitude; I was tempted to go join tweezers and help come up with more stupid plots, just to see him fail at each one. I was pushed to join tweez even more when Drakon got into an argument with other Reporters about why his nickname isn't racist, and how he doesn't even see race. I knew race leads to politics, and politics leads to covfefe. I however didn't have enough of an urge to join tweezers in his anti-socialness, so I just moved over to the next couch, which was a bit farther from the fire place, and closer to our computers, which acted as a great reminder to me that my life is in fact depressing and that this break will end soon and I will have to go back to regular routine of mindless work while Flexoo peaks over my solder every few minutes saying things like "you forgot the 'v' in 'covfefe'". I distracted myself from that degrading reality by picking my nose again, which resulted in Hexed glancing over at me again. This time it was less about the feeling of being caught picking your nose, and more about the feeling you get when you accidentally lock eyes with someone and get look away. I managed to turn my head after around five seconds of paralyzation, which resulted in me launching my mind straight into a conversation was having with @Destrod. They were talking about how boring this lame get-together was and how it was just a tad better than us sitting around in front of our computers. I agreed with them, so I left. Not just because of the boredom, but because I began feeling like a stalker; listening into just about everyone's conversations. Besides, I wanted to see what @Marc was up to, he wasn't around the fire place. As I was walking out, Vikingsrall asked me where I was going. I put on a shrimpy-kid voice at replied "Wa-wa-washroom, sir". He shrugged and went back to doing whatever 3vil work Administrators do, like sorting pays (not that we get paid). I went outside, where I found @Marc smoking. Not actually smoking, we, as an official newspaper don't promote such unhealthy filth. He was smoking a chocolate stick. Why? Not sure. I told him I was going to go down the street to the Department of Social Staff Members, being I heard that there was a get together there too. Department of Social Staff Members, Washington, D.C., 2017 He told me to wait for him to finish he fake cigarette and that he wanted to come to. So, after Marc finished, we headed straight for the Department of SSM. Upon arriving at the Department of SSM, we were greeted by a grumpy looking @Maf, who was dressed in a shirt with eight pockets and a hat that gave off 'I'm one of those rare guys that work on New Year's' vibes. After two or three minutes of awkward staring at one another, he finally spoke up, asking us "So? What are you kids doing here?" We replied telling him that we're Reporters, and that we wanted to join the party inside. I don't think he took that too well... "Listen losers, I'm the the security guard of this place, and nothing you say could change my mind. Reporters aren't social, it's a known fact. I will not allow your toxic, narcissistic attitudes into this party. Hear me?" After a whole lot of arguing, Maf let Marc in, being he was a Wiki Editor too, so he met Maf's "social standards". I however was stuck outside, so I decided to walk around to the back, to try to find an open window to climb through. And to my great relief, there was in fact a slightly open window. I climbed through and was greeted by @Winner_Of_Turkey, who was holding a turkey. I asked him where the party was, and he showed me directions to the party room, where all social staff members were chatting and having fun. Time to get stalking. In the far corner of the room was @Ninja, being a very clumsy and bad ninja. He snuck around the room, trying to steal plates of food out of people's hands only to fail and instead knock it out of their hands, causing it to fall to the floor and make a large crash. He crawled under tables for no apparent reason. He could've just as well walked around the table just as smooth. Right in the centre of the party were the group of chat moderators, who distances themselves from everyone else, and kept huddled together in a circle around , the Indestructible Chat Administrator, who also just so happens to be an ostrich. They acted as a wall around her, from any potential threats, I guess. They made scowling sneers at other helpers who passed them by a bit too closely. Sometimes they even frisked helpers in search for bombs who hand grenades. I had to look away from them though, because it seemed like they grew concerned of my whereabouts; they all began staring at me intensely. I tried to find Marc, but when I did, he was already flirting with a group of female tankers, so I let him be. This was his chance to get his first girlfriend. So I turned away, looking around for @SwiftSmoky, when all of a sudden, a Smoky and Wasp came flying through the doors, smashing them open to either side, and hurtled through the air before finally hitting the opposite wall, where he fell to the floor. There were a few moments of awkward silence, before Swift got up, straightened himself out, and yelled; "Sorry I'm late guys! Let's get this party started!" The music turned back up instantly, and everyone returned to their conversations about what they wanted for Christmas, undoubtedly trying to hint to one another that they want them to by them that specific thing. Meanwhile, there were a few people scattered across the party room who seemed less happy, and more distressed. They paced back and forth in a small path, pulling their hair once in a while, and, occasionally, some even gave out an awkward yell of disturbance. These were the forgetful, and usually overly loaded with work people who completely forgot what time of year it was, despite all the ads on TV, YouTube, radio, billboards, stores, bus stops, washroom, and only realized once they arrived at this very party. This being the case, they had no idea how they'd manage to buy everyone they know gifts. Their saviour came however, as @I3est burst through the doors looking dressed for work. He pushed a trolly labeled 'Cheap & Junky Christmas Present for the Friends You Rather not Have!'. All those stressed out helpers ran toward the trolly and picked out spatulas and over sized rubber ducks at random in relief. Not much was happening on the ground now, besides @Hate who was getting into verbal arguments with basically everyone else in the room. But noticed out of the corner of my eye something higher above; huge drones masked with the Alligator paint, were scanning the hall. Occasionally they yelled out to everyone 'Your Reporter has been sent', which caused panic amongst the helpers. "Who Reporter me, did you? Oh it was for sure you! NO, YOU! Who reported? Okey, I report all then." 'Your Reporter has been sent' 'Your Reporter has been sent' 'Your Reporter has been sent' 'Your Reporter has been sent' ... In the midst of the chatter and accusing, I heard Flexoo's mettle clanks near closer and closer. He knew I was there so I need to get out of there. I ran outside, and into the dark and snow deserted streets, where I lost him. I walked past closed shops with gifts in the window, as snow fells quietly onto my overly large nose. Have a Merry Christmas and Happy New Year! Previous articles in this series: If the English Community was a Company...If the English community was a Football [soccer] Team What if the English Community was a Restaurant If the English community was a City If the English Community was Stuck on a Desert Island If the English Community was a Hotel If the English Community was a Bowling Alley If the English Community Went Trick or Treating