tanki jokes

[sachet100 1,020]

I just wanted to let u know that tommrow there will be 50% sale on prepaid cards! BTW I am using internet explorer to post this.

[BlitzPanzer12345 241]

^ hahahahahaha

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

[golden5648 1,686]

The other topic was called 'jokes'. You won't be able to find it anymore as it has been merged with this topic. :)

ok!

[golden5648 1,686]

So here is what I'm thinking; when we reply to a post (jokes topic remember) maybe we could make our statement, then, finish off with a little comment like this---  > Yo Momma is so harry, Big Foot took a picture of her!

 

Ok now, that was a little more entertaining right? 1. Make statement.  2. Tell joke.   I'm just saying... :rolleyes:

¥aa! but we can also tell the jokes the other way  :ph34r:  :ph34r:  :ph34r:

[genak138 950]

 

Keep going

Go ahead.

You're doing great!!!

Almost there!!!

And this is why I did it:

Cause I felt like it :P

 

 

 

 

 

 

Edited February 19, 2015 by genak138

[Areeb321 151]

What Wasp said to freeze ?

Said : A freeze don't freeze me I am sick and making more sick !!!

Hahaha

[Nightingale 70]

Rail: Hey Mammoth! Aren't you extinct?

Mammy: It might seem like it, but really it's because I is so slow.

Rail: Hey Titan! Aren't you an ancient god of Greece?

Titan: With my armour you might think so, ha ha.

Rail: Hey Wasp!... swat

Wasp: Oh noooo!

Rail: Oh yeah!

Rail: Hey Hornet!... swa...

Hornet: Ha ha, missed, it's called Nitro baby!

 

Freeze and Firebird go on a date.

They decide Iceland, the land of Ice and Fire, would be perfect.

On the first date they ascend a beautiful and stark glacier...

Freeze: You know that a mile below us lies an enormous volcano?

Firebird: Eyjafjallajökull?

Freeze: Whoa there hotstuff, let's wait until the third date.

 

Twins and Isida met, one day, outside the job centre.

Twins: Hi Isida, still looking for work?

Isida looks glum.

Isida: Well, you know, it's not what you nano but who you nano.

 

Twins goes to the gym for a workout. Much later Twins bumps into Rico. Rico is worn out after a dozen reps. Rico looks at Twins shining guns with some envy and asks 'Twins, how come you don't get worn out?'. Twins looks puzzled and finally replies 'Crikey I don't know, I guess it's just the way I'm made'.

Edited February 20, 2015 by Nightingale

[Nightingale 70]

I am Titan! I have strength and power.

I am Mammy, stronger but slower.

I am Wasp! So nimble, so fast.

I am Viking, sure on my tracks.

I am Dictator, I dominate the ground.

I am Hunter! I'm good all round.

 

I am Hornet, this is my fact.

While you were blathering, I took the flag.

[Nightingale 70]

Rail has joined a battle in Dusseldorf for the first time and managed to catch the flag. But on the way back Rail was lost!

Rail: Hey Hornet! I am lost and I can't find my base. I have the flag and I really want the points.

Hornet: What!! But I am on the Blue Team and you are on the Red Team. Why would I tell you where to go?

Rail: This is true but I am Rail and I'll shoot you of you don't give me directions.

Hornet thinks for a second and realises the situation isn't advantageous.

Hornet: You're powerful and I can't refuse your logic. I will tell you, go left, left, right, left and you're there.

Rail: Thank you.

Rail shoots Hornet, Hornet wails and the last words can be heard.

Hornet: Why! Why did you shoot me?

Rail: I am Rail.

[Nightingale 70]

>Ultimate Pwer Tanker has joined the chatroom.

Ultimate Pwer Tanker: I have a great and new idea for a tank. It's like got the armor of Mammoth and the speed of Wasp.

Hardworking Mod One: It's too powerful, this idea will never be acceptable, but keep the ideas coming!

Ultimate Pwer Tanker: Meh, I have a new cooler idea. It's called The Beetle. It looks like a Beetle car. Pros - it's cool and looks cool, Cons - you can't carry a gun.

Hardworking Mod One: What! That's ridiculous and after all this is a tank game! What's the use of a hull that doesn't carry a gun?

Ultimate Pwer Tanker: Meh, I have even cooler idea, It's called 'THE OIL RIG', it has infinite health and can carry multiple guns. Cons - it doesn't move.

Hardworking Mod One: What!!! That's even more ridiculous, even if you could have something like that it would cost 10s of millions of crystals. Who's going to afford that?

Ultimate Pwer Tanker: Ha noob. I think there shuld be more and bigger Gold Boxes.

Hardworking Mod One: Noooooooooo!

>Hardworking Mod One has retired from the chatroom, TO, the world and joined a monastery.

 

Hope you like the jokes and tall tales! I'll be back with more if I can come up with some inspirations. Peace, xl.

Edited February 19, 2015 by Nightingale

[Nightingale 70]

Godmode_ON FACTS

 

Godmode_ON is forum member since 13 Dec 1901 20:45:52, this the minimum value for a 32-bit signed integer timestamp, therefore only UNIX is more powerful than Godmode_ON 

 

Ice is just water that was scared by Godmode_ON

Godmode_ON will kill Godmode_ON's shadow, just because it gets too close

Chuck Norris wears Godmode_ON pyjamas

 

If you can see Godmode_ON then Godmode_ON can see you, if you can't see Godmode_ON then your tank is probably going to die soon

 

Thunder doesn't actually fire any rounds, it's Godmode_ON passing wind

Godmode_ON lost a turret in an epic battle with 50 XPs, you might know it as the Milky Way

Godmode_ON makes onions cry

 

Godmode_ON ordered a Big Mac at Burger King! Godmode_ON got the Big Mac

Godmode_ON goes into a bar, bar collapses

Twins used to be called Triplets and had three barrels, that was until Triplets met Godmode_ON

 

There used to be a map called Godmode_ON, they had to change the name as no one crosses Godmode_ON

Edited February 20, 2015 by Nightingale

[Nightingale 70]

Freeze and Firebird go on a second date.

Firebird: Hey Freeze, did you see 50 Shades Of Grey?

Freeze: Is that a new paint? Sound's weird.

Firebird: No, it's a...

Freeze: No wait, it's a new supply? Some special camouflage?

Firebird: Oh no, I'll tell you it's...

Freeze: You mean it's a new hull? Finally, at last we can...

Firebird: Shut up! I can't get a word...

Freeze: I got it! It's a new turret!

Firebird: FREEZE! You play tooooo much Tanki. Get a life!

[Yisroel.Rabin 16,224]

[Nightingale 70]

>World Wide Dominator has joined the chatroom.

World Wide Dominator: This game is too cool, I'm having the time of my life.

Hardworking Mod Two: Glad to hear that, great to have you with us!

World Wide Dominator: But it's so hard to get better ranks.

Hardworking Mod Two: Keep playing! It'll get easier (ahem).

World Wide Dominator: I really want that FV215b (183), for a Tier X it's BOOM with the HE shells.

Hardworking Mod Two: What! That's not in this game.

World Wide Dominator: Wait up, this isn't World of Tanks?

Hardworking Mod Two: Noooooooooo!

World Wide Dominator: So what have I been playing for the last two years?

>Hardworking Mod Two has retired from the chatroom, TO, the world and taken up potato cultivation.

 

That'll be enough for tonight, gotta get some shut-eye. Peace, xl.

Edited February 20, 2015 by Nightingale

[canadarules 1,938]

omg that is so not funny

[genak138 950]

xl, your jokes are so funny. Keep 'em comin' :)

[canadarules 1,938]

 'em comin' :)

is that a joke?

[genak138 950]

No, it's just a common way to say that the "th" and "g" are cut off.

[sachet100 1,020]

Freeze and Firebird go on a second date.

Firebird: Hey Freeze, did you see 50 Shades Of Grey?

Freeze: Is that a new paint? Sound's weird.

Firebird: No, it's a...

Freeze: No wait, it's a new supply? Some special camouflage?

Firebird: Oh no, I'll tell you it's...

Freeze: You mean it's a new hull? Finally, at last we can...

Firebird: Shut up! I can't get a word...

Freeze: I got it! It's a new turret!

Firebird: FREEZE! You play tooooo much Tanki. Get a life!

Fifty shades of grey?!?  -_- please kids don't tell ur mommy to watch that,

Edited February 21, 2015 by sachet100

[BlitzPanzer12345 241]

i know what it is !

itz  a new deck of  cards

itz cool

:)

[PowerStrike1.1 270]

i know what it is !

itz  a new deck of  cards

itz cool

:)

As in BlitzPanzer12345.

[BlitzPanzer12345 241]

As in BlitzPanzer12345.

cool

never saw that

[canadarules 1,938]

No, it's just a common way to say that the "th" and "g" are cut off.

wow i saw a funy joke and you ruined it thanks -__-

[genak138 950]

wow i saw a funy joke and you ruined it thanks -__-

Sorry, I didn't see any joke in keep 'em comin'. What did you see?

[canadaruIes 13]

http://en.tankiforum.com/index.php?showtopic=245903

tries to get someone banned, does and gets himself banned :lol: