Contest [Issue 27] Can you Contribute to Tanki's Finest News Source?

[canadarules 1,938]

The Drought of Forum Fun

 

Recent reports have indicated that there have been no Contests in the forum for almost four months. Oh, wait....that’s a fact. Many reporters have indicated that this is due to the simple fact, of a shortage of Vodka in Russia. With the shortage of Vodka, the developers have gone into a deep spiral of depression where they have lost all meaning of knowing 'What is fun?’ After learning of this Development News many players started to grow anger towards developers in a very childish way, so much so that even one of their own employees Semyon Kirov decided to post a message saying 'We are extremely depressed! Do not bother us or send us vodka!' This drought also prompted the starting of star ladder which took away all clan tournaments from the forum which made  a lot of people angry. It was like the forum was being zapped of all fun and this was happening over some Vodka?!?! One of the players (Remaine) even spoke out against this situation as he remained drunk saying 'Fen-Harel , GoldRock, tsd2000, Damn Slow and I just drank 200 liters of Vodka today, but if I knew the Dev's needed it i would have sent them it so we could continue with clan tournaments and contests on the forum.' What caring forum members but what selfish Developers you might say. But is it true?  Who really is the Villain here? Is it Russia's Vodka industry or the dev's? :blink:

Edited October 21, 2014 by canadarules

[I.H.U.R.R.I.C.A.N.E 120]

ya this sort of thing happens when your going throu with-draul. make some good updates to make us players happy the last update the drugg cool downs wer not to smart :) i quit buy cristals on tanki cause druggs are what i bout with them now its just boring drugging

[fighter310 67]

A New General(issimo) is on his Way

 

On Monday October 13^th, tanker fighter310, known by as friends as ‘Fighty’, ranked to General. That’s just 4 steps away from achieving every tank man’s dream. And no, it is not tank women or a sack full of crystals; it is to become a generalissimo! Gee – it took the man months to rank up. I wonder what happened?

 

According to a tanker who chose to be anonymous, the rank up took place in Sparta – whoops I mean Madness. A bald – whoops - *bold* challenger nicknamed ‘’Flitter’’ decided to invade his privacy. Aware about this strange visitor in his environment, Fighty sprang into action. He cleaned his railgun, deleted his internet history, and out he went. Then, with precise timing, Fighty did a front-flip railgun shot overhead and shot the twerp right where it hurts! ‘Ow my railgun!’ screamed Flitter as he flittered away. The rest of the report ends with Fighty regaining balance – and headed to capture the flag. It was also reported that instantly 4 golden stars came out of him and to outer space; indicating that Fighter ranked to General!

 

 ‘’I think he’s a star – no wait, 4 stars!’’ said a wise man named MonsterofEruption.

 

The whereabouts of Fighter, and the time of his next rank-up, are unknown…

Edited October 23, 2014 by fighter310

[GoldRock 6,165]