[Issue 40] Internet Bullies

[sonofchrysalis3 3,719]

Tears streamed down my little sister’s burning cheeks and fell noiselessly onto the bed. Her voice trembled as she tried to tell me what had happened.

 

“There was a guy on the website.... He called me names, and... he told me I’m (censored).”

 

She bit her lip as more tears came.

 

“He said he was going to... to get me-.”

 

Her voice broke. She buried her face in my shoulder and cried harder than an eight-year-old should ever have reason to cry.

 

I am quickly losing my patience with humans. This is the second time that one has hurt my sister. It won’t happen again: Cirrus has turned off her computer for the last time. She is now scarred for life because two horrible individuals had nothing better to do than prey upon the young and innocent.

 

I can’t describe the pain of seeing the suffering of a loved one for whom I’ve laid my life on the line. There is no physical hurt strong enough to compare it to. But what hurts just as much is remembering when I caused somepony else to suffer.

 

I am, by definition, a monster. I come from a species whose primary characteristics are wanton gluttony and a sick delight in causing problems. Less than two years ago, both were deeply embedded in me, and I loved it.

 

But I’m over that now. My new family and friends have helped me escape my old nature and start a new life as everypony’s friend and companion. I still occasionally have relapses, but for all practical purposes, I have totally changed.

 

And I’m thirteen years old. Your species has been around for millennia.

 

Would you mind explaining why you can’t change in your thousands of years when I have changed in less than two?

 

Bullies are present in both our worlds, but yours are much more proficient at using the internet. Yours actually taught me some new tricks when I was a bully. I have a lot of experience with internet bullies, and I plan to take advantage of it now, to give the honorable among you a look at what they do, why they do, and what to do about them.

 

1.)    What they do

 

An internet bully uses the... wait for it... internet

 

 

 

 

as a means of communicating hateful and damaging messages, media, etc. They spend quite a bit of time on the computer and usually group together like wolves, doing whatever the other bullies are doing and to the same victim.

 

a. Insult

 

The whole “sticks and stones” business is garbage. Words do hurt, and nothing hurts quite like being personally attacked. The bully isn’t saying that something you said or did is bad; he’s saying that you yourself are inherently bad in an unfair and undefinable way.

 

b. Intimidate

 

The bully makes a frightening statement, a threat for example, intended to keep you from doing something that he doesn’t want you to, like report his words or actions. Most threats are groundless and empty, but are phrased in such a way that the victim is taken aback to the point of distraction and doesn’t see the lack of power that the bully really has.

 

c. Incite

 

A bully’s favorite thing to do is light a match and watch the fire spread out of control. He will say something, maybe a single sentence, which will throw the website into a chaotic frenzy that leaves hearts broken and lives scarred.

 

 

2.)    Why they do what they do

 

a. Pleasure

 

The mind of a bully is a dark, nasty place. He finds amusement in causing others pain. To him, it is a way of life. Even when he’s off of the computer, he’s thinking about what to say or do next that will cause the most problems.

 

The bully observes when another acts like him online and compliments him. He might join him in whatever destructive thing he’s doing; they may even become the best of friends.

 

He laughs when someone online tries to defend himself. Some use logic to try to convince the bully to change, but he isn’t being abusive due to flawed logic. Some lash back at him, fighting fire with fire, and he simply hits back harder. It’s all a game to him.

 

b. Personal Gain

 

Some more intelligent bullies use their ability to intimidate to make victims, especially young ones, give up important information. He’ll throw out vulgarities and threats in an attempt to scare the victim, then he’ll demand things like account passwords and private financial details. This is what the bully did to my sister a few days ago.

 

The threats are usually empty, since the bully’s only means of accessing the victim is via internet. As I mentioned, he has no way to carry out the dastardly things he says, but he words it in such a way that the victim doesn’t realize that.

 

3.)    How to deal with them

 

Talking to a bully is dangerous, but that’s always the route most will take. Some think they can change his mind, while others think they can turn the tables on him. Neither is effective. These, however, are:

 

a. Avoid

 

Did the bully send you a violent email? Then stop reading it and delete it! He needs you to read it in order to hurt you, so if you don’t, he is defeated.

 

Is he on a discussion forum, luring you into an argument? Go somewhere else. Bullies don’t argue rationally, they simply say whatever they think will agitate you more, so you won’t get anywhere by taking the bait and talking to him.

 

Let me take a brief aside here to provide a personal anecdote. Some may remember what I said in the reply section of Issue 37’s “Equipment Advertising” contest results. A number of contestants didn’t win and were mad about it, and a few bullies were filling the reply section with angry posts.

 

I responded by lashing back, which probably has you wondering why I’m saying you shouldn’t. I responded because, back then, I didn’t know that they wouldn’t relent.

 

I did know that they might send me hate-filled PMs (and they did), so I consulted with my aunt Luna before making my response. She warned me that bullies wouldn’t care what I said, but she did give me the tranquilizing hex that I asked her for. With the hex in place, I could make my reply and resist the urge to counter the flood of emails I got.

 

The end result of taking my valiant stand for the cause of justice? The bullies overran the Equipment Ad with angry (yet pitifully hilarious) replies, and Lhamster had to lock it down.

 

Oops. Lesson learned: avoiding the bully is the most effective way to fight back.

 

b. Report

 

Sometimes a bully takes a step too far. He’ll make a threat, or violate some law, and then you have him dead to rights. On Tanki, you can take a screenshot of in-game chats and report them to the Chat Violators page. In the forum, simply click the Report button at the bottom of the bully’s post.

 

Other sites have different rules. Some need you to email to report the bully’s actions, others may require you to call a help line, but rest assured that most sites have a way to report violations.

 

I’m going to let you in on a dirty little secret. Call me a sick cookie if you want, but I have a folder hidden deep within my computer documents labeled Prison. Within the folder are screenshots of every Tanki violator I have reported and gotten banned. The folder grows steadily all week, every week.

 

One of my favorite pastimes on Tanki is to watch chat rooms and take screenshots of all the chat violators I see. Violator Hunting is a satisfying, perfectly legal way for me to avenge my sister; I enjoy it thoroughly. Try it sometime.

 

c. Get off of the computer

 

Occasionally, though, the bully is too smart to slip up. He seems to stalk you around the site, nagging you and trying to irritate you enough to make you slip up yourself.

 

This is when you should hit that power button. It’s a radical move, but Cirrus did it, and look what it got her: she escaped the bully. No one on the internet can hurt you if you aren’t on the internet.

 

* * * * * * * *

 

Internet bullies are just like every other bully: they seem to love their life of anger and hate. The average Joe cannot fathom how they can live with themselves. Watching the Evil run free with a clear conscience can be very discouraging to the Good.

 

Don’t be deceived. All is not well within the heart of the bully.

 

He is full of fear. Every night he tosses and turns upon his bed, wallowing in the agonizing dread that someone somewhere saw what he has said and done and reported him. He rises from a sleepless night and holds his breath as he logs onto his computer, half-expecting to be permanently banned.

 

He cannot escape his guilt. He tries to bury it deep enough within himself so he doesn’t feel it, but it is still there, constantly reminding him of the pain he has caused. As long as he continues his wicked lifestyle, the guilt will continue to eat him from the inside out.

 

The bully must live without true friendship. He thought he could be mean online but still have friends in real life, but he learned too late how wrong he was. What you are on the inside will come out, no matter who you are with. He emerged from his computer and couldn’t help but treat his friends just as viciously as if they were online. So they left him.

 

Above all, the bully looks to his future and sees nothing. He has no friends. His conscience tortures him day and night. His life has no meaning.

 

Deep down, his soul is just like yours and mine. He wants to be happy and enjoy life, but he is also depraved and prone to moral error. You can pity him, but not too much. The only way he’ll ever change is when he gets fed up with the pain that comes with being a bully.

 

Until that happens, stay away from him. You’ll be doing him a favor.

 

Edited September 14, 2015 by sonofchrysalis3

[DanTheKiller1 2,889]

You do have some talent at writing,amazing article!

[EuzLo 491]

Great read! I'm looking forward to reading more of your articles, Stratus! 

[canadarules 1,938]

Well looks like i fall under this category :P

[r_gigiz0 327]

so true

[sha77777_super 877]

Your writing is simple amazing bro! 

[BlazingCoder 108]

o true/.

[Barra 1,445]

Man this made me think deeply...

[Cor7y 13,862]

Internet bullies ? Gotta run away and hide in a corner watch out for them :ph34r:

Edited September 19, 2015 by Cor7y

[anuclearbomb 220]

so that's why the gave us tanks..

 great article Stratus ( i like the name, mostly cause it's short) always look forward to more.

[Halinator 52]

Those who become bullies almost can never change. They go down a wormhole from delinquency to crime. It usually is unstoppable.

 

This article is very true.

 

Do not be scared of bullies even if they threat you, it is their psychological way of dealing with fear.

[Hex 11,520]

Good article! Keep it up :D One of the best ever since Issue 30 ;)

__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

|| PDox ||

[flametank73 0]

One of the best articles i have ever read!! :)  :)  :)  :)  :)  :)  :)  :)  :)  :)  :)

[GHOST68INVINCIBLE 152]

U sound like Batman. :D sonof change your logo into the batmans logo that would be epic.

[SandmanDRW 5]

Nice and helpful article, good job!

[The-Operator219 1,929]

This is the reason I never let my sister do online gaming.

Well written, as always.

[Sleek 43]

 

2.)    Why they do what they do

 

a. Pleasure

 

The mind of a bully is a dark, nasty place. He finds amusement in causing others pain. To him, it is a way of life. Even when he’s off of the computer, he’s thinking about what to say or do next that will cause the most problems.

 

The bully observes when another acts like him online and compliments him. He might join him in whatever destructive thing he’s doing; they may even become the best of friends.

 

He laughs when someone online tries to defend himself. Some use logic to try to convince the bully to change, but he isn’t being abusive due to flawed logic. Some lash back at him, fighting fire with fire, and he simply hits back harder. It’s all a game to him.

 

b. Personal Gain

 

Some more intelligent bullies use their ability to intimidate to make victims, especially young ones, give up important information. He’ll throw out vulgarities and threats in an attempt to scare the victim, then he’ll demand things like account passwords and private financial details. This is what the bully did to my sister a few days ago.

 

The threats are usually empty, since the bully’s only means of accessing the victim is via internet. As I mentioned, he has no way to carry out the dastardly things he says, but he words it in such a way that the victim doesn’t realize that.

 

 

Another reason they do what they do is because they are to some degree insecure about themselves, and to make themselves feel better, they pick on others (or pick out their flaws). This is mainly what happened to me when I was like 5, then I realized I was less of a loser than the bully was ^^

[EpicJ77 2]

This is great article keep the good writing up. :)

[BIZ_THE_DESTROYER 126]

Thanks man,This helped me alot..Ur article was AMAZING! Keep on writing like this.. :) :)

[BIG-RED-0NE 5]

Hackers and Bullies

red = where the comment came from

blue = the specific part of the comment that i'm talking about

 

great job writing this, however, there is one spot that i noticed that is incorrect from my experience of video game/website facts. you stated: 

b. Personal Gain

 

Some more intelligent bullies use their ability to intimidate to make victims, especially young ones, give up important information. He’ll throw out vulgarities and threats in an attempt to scare the victim, then he’ll demand things like account passwords and private financial details. This is what the bully did to my sister a few days ago.

 

The threats are usually empty, since the bully’s only means of accessing the victim is via internet. As I mentioned, he has no way to carry out the dastardly things he says, but he words it in such a way that the victim doesn’t realize that.

 

           i hate to state this as i would never want anyone to have to go through the threats of bullies or even hackers. its actually not that hard to obtain this info for many people. any company is able to be hacked and all the credit card info would be exploited. think about when Sony got hacked and stated that it is possible that 10M credit card numbers have been stolen and are at risk due to hackers. and id imagine their electronic technology is very hard to decipher considering the company is worth 17.7B US Dollars. but thats not always the case. also if someone has bought crystals with a credit card/debit card it is possible for hackers/computer geniuses to obtain that information. especially with the option for using paypal as that company may be hacked and have all your credit/debit card info exploited. the reason i do not like paypal is because if it ever does get hacked then that means that all that saved data on that feature (credit/debit card info, names, addresses, emails, and such) will be discovered if hacked. not trying to discourage people from buying crystals either but i just want to enlighten people about this topic. i have learned a bunch of knowledge in my college course that deals with this computer language and coding, and my professor had stated that people have been robbed of their credit cards and bribed over the phone to give them cold hard cash otherwise they'd put the card on the internet. this is a very scary thing to have happen to you. also it is possible for hackers to get ip addresses which then lead them to the address of your house through Skype. so if anyone asks for Skype name be careful and be sure you can trust them. personally i rarely give out my Skype name because of this. however if you want to communicate with someone use teamspeak. its much more safe in my opinion plus its much harder to get ip addresses.

 

            with this said, i would just like everyone to be safe with how they use their own or their parents credit cards especially, but also debit cards. just make sure any company you share that info with is secure and has a good reputation of security of credit card theft. but don't give credit card info out easily, but if you have to give it out, give it to companies that have not been hacked in the past in my opinion. i know tankionline has never been hacked as a company so that puts out a good reputation of informational security for them. anything you put your credit card/debit card info into is able to be hacked, its just a matter of how high the security level is of their company. yes it is hard, but its possible for anyone with the knowledge to do so. i know you said "As I mentioned, he has no way to carry out the dastardly things he says, but he words it in such a way that the victim doesn’t realize that." Bullies actually can do many things they say. but the thing is we don't know if were talking to hackers that are also bullies or not. if they say i will publicly advertise your private information via the internet and it is a hacker then they could do that. they could even get info about anything you type through key logging/phishing websites. what i think of on this topic of private info is the whole Jennifer Lawrence problem where some of her things on her iPhone got publicly shown to everyone in the world via the internet. not going to go into much more detail than that because i do not want to say too much info on this weird topic about jennifer lawrence. it was all over the news but if you don't watch the news you may not understand what I'm talking about. i am assuming you don't considering your 13. sure as heck i didn't watch the news when i was 13 but i wish i did. thanks for reading this massive comment. sorry about the length.

Edited September 21, 2015 by BIG-RED-0NE

[personia 4,036]

I agree, although I do think that you're being a little bit harsh on bullies. But other than that, nice article!  ;)  ;)  ;)

[npc5 3]

When people say something rude or nasty or vulgar to me, I typically say, "God bless you". Bullies bully beacause they are insecure about themselves, or abusive parents. Ihave said that for the past few months and almost evry one of them (accept for one that was atheist) thanked me and apologized for acting so hastily.

Edited September 21, 2015 by npc5

[mueez_007 2]

You just told the truth of the so-called "sophisticated" people of TO. It is a very big problem,and the worst thing in it is "duality".On one hand,many people insist to stay away of such players.On other hand,they ARE THAT tanker .Thats why we can just comment,but unfortunately noone tries to act upon it and be a good player.

And by the way,Good writing Skills.

[GHOST68INVINCIBLE 152]

Dude If u really need to protect your sister let her grow up to a suitable age so she could play online games.The internet can be a dangerous and violent place sometimes. :(

 

(and I hope your lil sister is now okay)

Edited September 21, 2015 by GHOST68INVINCIBLE

[simes123 0]

This is incredible and I think that more people need to tell people to shut up sometimes.

I've had to deal with dummies like that before and it seems to do nothing but give them a source of power.

B)