[Issue 54] [Special] Newspaper Crystal Giveaway... with a twist!

[Zanlasha_G 119]

@Zanlasha_G

@NamesAreForNoobs

 

What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup?

 

 

Anyone can roast beef, but nobody can pea soup!

 

 

Edited July 3, 2016 by Zanlasha_G

[LaserShark 2,095]

@LaserShark @poop

 

Annnnd... the joke:

 

"Free to Play"

 

Edited July 3, 2016 by LaserShark

[falcosenna1 8,320]

@falcosenna1

 

Science joke :p

 

 

Oxygen was drinking a cola in a bar. A bit later Helium came in the bar. The bartender asked if Helium wanted something to drink, but Helium didn't react. 

 

 

[sonson58 4]

@sonson58

 

 

High-school life:

 

=Most irritating moment 

-morning alarm

( let me get some sleep plz) :angry: 

=Most Difficult Task

-to find socks :(  :angry: 

=Most tragic Moments

-Surprise Test IN 1ST Period (and i didn't study) -_- :angry:  :angry: 

=Most Wonderful News

-TEACHER IS ABSENT (turn up) :)

:D  :D  :D  :D Finally after years :D  :P  :)  :rolleyes: 

:)  :)  :D  :D  :D it's like she doesn't have a life  :rolleyes:  :rolleyes:  B)  B)  B) 

Edited July 3, 2016 by sonson58

[fighter310 67]

[rank:30] Sonson48
[rank:30] shamari

Joke:

 

What do you say when you are comforting a Grammar Nazi? 

There, their, they're. 

 

 

[Boeing_787 1,455]

@player_2015_tanker

 

And of course, here is the included joke

 

 

Have you ever noticed that when you step on someone's foot they open their mouth, just like a trash can?

 

Edited July 3, 2016 by Boeing_787

[ToiletPaperRoll 1,318]

@Cedric Debono

Man: If i die, will you remarry?

Woman: Of course no darling, i will stay with my sister. And if i die will you remarry?

Man: No, i will also stay with your sister.

Edited July 3, 2016 by ToiletPaperRoll

[vansh10 34]

vansh10

ramniranjan

Human:Siri, why do you always search the web?

Siri:Okay, searching web for 'the web'

Edited July 3, 2016 by vansh10

[Bluebird13 95]

 

 

@Bluebird13

@Birdfriend

 

(That's a laugh, above, but serious, too)

 

Joke:

Why did the turkey cross the road?

Because it wasn't a chicken.

 

 

Edited July 4, 2016 by Bluebird13

[Inducer 12]

1.

2. @Inducer

 

How does someone who hates bears describe Grizzlies?

 

 

Unbearable!

 

 

[ihatepasswordisback 152]

1. slycleaversmart

2. shellfire_tanki

 

joke: It was so dark outside when I saw Donald Trump clapping at Hilarly Clinton's speech.

Edited July 4, 2016 by ihatepasswordisback

[M1-A2 840]

1: M1-A2

2: DaBaum

 

Dear math, stop asking me to find your X. She isn't coming back.

[Cke1st 102]

McSwaggerton72

Cke1st

 

Two businessmen met for lunch. "I'll have an iced tea," the first one tells the waiter.

"Me, too," agrees the second, "and make sure the glass is clean!"

Five minutes later, the waiter comes back with a tray. "Two iced teas.  Which one wanted the clean glass?"

[Quora 125]

@DejectedTomato

 

 

If i had a dollar for every girl that found me unattractive, they would eventually find me attractive.....

:p :D

[Mr.Latvian 3,597]

@Zupas_BlodaLV

@Mr.Latvian

 

 

You know what is the difference between tea bag and England?

 

Tea bag stays longer in a cup

 

 

[Yisroel.Rabin 16,224]

@Yisroel.Rabin

@Godmode_ON

 

Why'd the noob cross the road, to get to the admin gold pls on the other side.

Edited July 4, 2016 by Yisroel.Rabin

[okutg 2]

Usernames:1)okutg 2)sniper109. Joke:During a flight to the sunny land of Africa, a middle-aged man pulled out a pair of binoculars and began to peer through them out the window.After a while the passenger seated next to him (an elderly lady) inquired as to what he was looking for.The man answered that he was looking for the equator."Could I try looking for it?" the lady asked gingerly."Sure!" the man answered with a broad smile.As the lady peered through the binoculars the man pulled out a strand of hair from his broad mop of curls and dangled it in front of the binoculars."Can you see the Equator madam?" he asked."Yes,Yes!" she answered eagerly,"and there is an elephant walking along it!"

Edited July 4, 2016 by okutg

[Virat.Kohli 86]

@Virat.Kohli

@indiarules

 

 

 

An American psychologist is selling a video that teaches you how to test your guinea pig's IQ. Here's how it works: If you spend $14.99 for the video, your guinea pig is smarter than you.

 

 

[zaara_tanker 89]

Hi i would like to give a joke.

@zaara_tanker

@lakassa147

Teacher:"where is your book??."

Student: "at home"

Teacher: "And whats it doing there??"

Student: "Having more fun than me"

[Concodroid 1]

The_Web and Concodroid

 

Homework-

Half

Of

My

Day

Wasted

On

Random

Knowledge

 

Games

Greatly

Amazing

Money-and-time wasting 

Educational

Sites

 

P.S. I don't know how to hyperlink the names to the address, so...

Edited July 4, 2016 by Concodroid

[alotharian 8]

@alotharian
@legobendi2

 

Joke:

It's 7 o'clock in the morning, the sun is hardly shining and the wind is chilly when a ghost is approaching a pub.

Having entered a pub the ghost goes to the bar and orders a whisky from the bartender.

Bartender: "Sorry, we don't serve spirits before nine."

[jazzter2 1]

@legoysombi2

@jazzter2

 

Son and father have a discussion.

Son asks: "Dad, what is the difference between unlucky and catastrophic?"

Father: "I tell you with an example. Unlucky is when your mom's mom, who is my mother-in-law, falls to the river from the bridge. If she were saved that would be catastrophe."

[doraemon100 2]

Players 1D-ONE_DIRECTION-1D and Virat.Kohli

 

I went to customer service at a clothing outlet to return a pair of jeans that was too tight.

"Anything wrong with the jeans?" the cashier asked.

"Yes," I replied. "They hurt my feelings"

Edited July 4, 2016 by doraemon100

[THE.LAST.AVENGER 585]

THE.LAST.AVENGER and hahahahaha55555

joke:

 

MY LIFE

[III_Dope_III 319]

1. iii_dope_iii

2. GoldRock

I heard Apple is designing a new automatic car. But they're having trouble installing windows.