[Issue 60] [Review] Exploring the Unknown: Siege

[Quarks 2,255]

 

Normally, as a part of the Tanki Online Newspaper, we are required to have a snappy introduction to attract the reader's attention. However, to sum up Siege, in a nutshell, the best thing I could think of was: "I forgot this map existed". This was originally going to be Atra, until Pdox mentioned Siege. Yeah, the guy who writes reviews of underrated maps forgot one, gg bry, gg.

 

 

Overview:

 

An overview of the map Siege, I'm so punny
 

One of the first things observed is the 'layered' structure. It has three separate heights/playing areas, a raised outer edge, a lower flat valley, and a raised center.

 

Outer Edge:

The first raised area in the map, it goes around the entire map and has the highest concentration of Speed Boosts on the map, one on each corner. It is fairly narrow, and is filled with walls and ramps. This is the best place for possible campers, though they have a limited view. 

 

Valley:

The large majority of battles fought take place in the Valley. It is home to the only four double armors in the entire map and two of the four Double Damages. This area does not have many straightaways, so head on battling is foregone for 'Peek-a-boo' and 'Hit-and-Run' tactics, so plan accordingly. Attacks here need to be well planned, by TO standards, and they need to be constant. But remember, the other team is trying to do the same. Also, remember the Mosh Pit from last time? No? Oh, well then, read here, the same still applies. Rock on m8s.

 

Raised Center:

The only place where you can find repair kits on the map, it is a prime location for hiding the flag while under siege. 

 

*Sorry for the interruption, but bry has temporarily removed from this article for atrocious wordplay. He will return after he has served his penance*

 

 

*3 weeks later* 

 

Sorry for that, Goldy kicked me out. Guess I now have to cram this article in one week. oops. Anyways, the center effectively divides the map in half, considering one-half of the center can't access the other easily, or rather at all. There happens to be an obnoxious piece of land that divides you and keeps you in your castle *smack* and protects from the incoming invaders *smack again*. Meanwhile, your team is going to their battle positions *smack*, and manning the battlements with mines *Rem smacks bry again*. Anyways, this is the keep *drop kick* OW! of this map. Did I mention this is the only part that has Repair Kits? I did? Oh, well, remember that.

 

Remaine has left the Conversation

*Parting Smack*

OW! Stop That!

 

The Hopeless Battle:

 

Siege is rarely seen because of one specific event that happened many years ago. If you have any questions about validity, ro PM Goldnug with long and vague messages plz.

Anyways, way back in late December of 2009, a fateful battle took place. Someone decided they wanted to try out the new map that was introduced on the third, and started a 1 flag siege battle. I mean, who would've thought that a 1 flag battle would take long. The tanker also decided to turn off the time limit, it seemed redundant.

He joined the battle he made and drove around for a little while, really wishing there was a friend feature in the game. Well, he didn't have to wait long before someone showed up. Then another, then another, and so the trend continued. The battle began, and then those poor tankers soon learned the reason the map was named Siege, it took forever. The battling was intense, and a fund kept growing and growing, but no one could cap the flag. They were very close multiple times, and the tanker who started it regretted not having the time limit.

And so the battle continued. It was so long that it put the distance between Between Tabs segments to absolute shame. The stalemate was so real that it felt like more than just a game. The game quite possibly could have gone on forever. Whenever someone left, a new player joined. And so it continued, until 2 A.M. UTC. Then the server restarted, with no winning team, and a boatload of crystals to hand out.

This singular occasion was reported to us reporters, who thought it was too stupid to be covered. In fact, we did not even exist at that point, further making this story true. However, TO administration did hear of this and was so angry, that they banned this tanker's name from ever being written. His name was censored by Semyon Kirov himself; we will never know who started it.

In short, the moral is Siege is rare because of one annoying battle. But that was years ago, go play Siege now, I'm sure there isn't a curse or anything...

 

I guess there is a curse, after all. By the way, anyone here?

 

 

Game Modes:

 

DM:

Can't really find anything wrong with the DM mode in Siege. It is complex, interesting, and all around fun. With the multi-level and asymmetrical design, there are multiple ways to play. Whether a kill stealing camper up top, close combat valley runner, to the alternating mid-ranger, there is something for all styles. There is always a fun challenge in joining a Siege DM.

 

TDM:

Similar to DM, except that you have a team. "Well duh bry, hence the the TEAM DM". Here, it actually makes a bit of a difference. With proper planning and team of friends, it is an incredibly different experience. You can actually plan everything out in your attack, and can effectively make a strategy on how to be successful. Well coordinated attacks will be your friend, and guarantee your success.

 

CTF:

More similar to TDM, except this time you have a goal in mind: that elusive flag. Involving planning or just constant rushing, the lack of repair kits forces you to have a strategy in place. The flags have a tendency to sit and wait while the other teammates try and force a return, while the opposing team plans your demise too. Definitely worth checking out.

 

Suck it, red team, I'm invincible! 

 

CP:

And finally, we have Siege CP. A little bit less strategy required than CTF of TDM, but it cannot be entirely ignored. Planning is still required, but it is a bit more fast paced, in theory. Similar to Gubahka, I have not seen a Siege CP in my wanderings of the server, so if any of you have, please comment about your experiences.
 

 

Another underrated map, another hidden gem. So I entreat you, go give it a try, invest yourself in its enjoyable gameplay and relieve the monotony of playing the same maps over and over again.

 

 

 

Edited January 6, 2017 by Quarks

[Jwimmer 2,835]

Not sure if I would call Siege "underrated". Its one of the maps where a single super skillful/strong drug user player can carry a team. People don't know the layout (I had not played it ever until it started popping up a month ago), so if you know the layout, you can dominate. The games I have played there have been decent, but its not a map I always want to play on.

[TTK_229 1,080]

Pls don't do Hill next OK nug Hairbrush

[Quarks 2,255]

Pls don't do Hill next OK nug Hairbrush

There isn't enough to say about hill, but idk which one to do next yet.

[Crip 4,735]

There isn't enough to say about hill, but idk which one to do next yet.

Nice article bry :)

 

What about Kolhoz as the subject of your next map guide?

[Quarks 2,255]

Nice article bry :)

 

What about Kolhoz as the subject of your next map guide?

lel, this wasn't a guide, and I would do that but Remaine already did that one. 

[Guest]

Can you do Lost temple next? 

[TTK_229 1,080]

Why are all the reporters changing their nicknames?

[Guest]

Why are all the reporters changing their nicknames?

Idk why