Contest [Issue 74] The Dictator: Write For Us

[Yisroel.Rabin 16,224]

 

Have you dreamt of writing for "The Dictator"? If you have, good for you - if you haven't, you're about to know what it feels like anyway! This is your chance to write for "The Dictator - Tanki's Finest News Source". Learn how to enter below!

 

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Task

 

Your task is to write a piece in "The Dictator" style, and potentially have it featured in next month's issue! Make it as funny as you like, because when it comes to humor, the sky's the limit! Don't make it too long, nor too short; about two or three paragraphs will do. Make it about anything you wish, as long as it has some sort of connection to Tanki. Remember, you want to keep things original, and not use old jokes. We will go through and filter out the best ones to be featured in next months issue.

 

Submit your entries here. 

 

 

The Rules

1. A max of two entries per individual are allowed (if more than two are submitted, only the first two will be judged). This includes alternate accounts!
2. Entry must have some sort of connection to Tanki.
3. It has to be funny. It's for The Dictator, after all.
4. Most importantly, plagiarism will result in immediate disqualification.

 

 

Deadline

 

The deadline for submitting your entry is Friday, the 27^th of April, 2018, 17:00 UTC+0.

 

 

The Prizes

Crystals per winning entry: 25 000 Crystals

 

 

Example

 

 

 

 

Dr. Sagittarii announces that playing Tanki is beneficial for your exams

By @Yisroel.Rabin

 

After many decades of isolation and self-incarceration, Doctor (formerly referred to as Lord Zenith, ruler of the underworld) has come back from the depths of his far away cave to announce the results of his intense experiments and works. He claims, with no proof whatsoever, besides for a gum wrapper with a girls phone number written on it (update: the phone number belongs to GoldRock), that playing Tanki Online at around this intense time of year, will actually improve results on students exams.

 

We asked him for some background on this conclusion, as he had no physical evidence to back-up his claims. He simple said that it will work because "swag." We are currently looking into what exactly the ethical meaning behind that statement was.

 

The reporter team, being a bunch of premature hooligans who get an F on all their exams anyways, have decided to take part in the experiment for scientific purposes only. A handful of reporters (mainly the ones whom are struggling and are desperate to graduate) will, like most years, not be studying for our upcoming exams too much, but will instead be engaging ourselves in this fascinating experiment, and will be playing Tanki Online for as long as re possibly can. Meaning, until our parents kick us off our computers because it's 3 AM.

 

In other news, while we (the dumb reporters) are brainwashing our already brainwashed minds in this experiment, the smart reporters (the nerds like Antarctica, tweezers, and... no one else) will be taking their own barricades in their respective bedrooms, studying for the exams they would pass even if they had not studied for them. Have fun smarties. Next year, play Tanki, and put that on your resume to Oxford.

 

 

 

NOTE If you want to use stuff like specific fonts / sizes / colors, images, GIFs and more, you can type out your entry in a forum post and send us a copy of the BBCode. To get the BBCode of your post, press the 'BBCode Mode' button at the top-left corner of your post editor ( ).

 

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Remember, the key is to be funny and original. Do your best and have the chance to be featured in next months "The Dictator"! Good luck!

 

 

[Yisroel.Rabin 16,224]

This topic is locked, post your submissions in the form linked above.