Impersonation - Chapter Three

[P.4.R.K.O.U.R 329]

Previous Chapters
Chapter One – A Surprise Attack
Chapter Two – The Task

The Meeting

He ran. He ran as fast as he could. He glimpsed behind. They were closing in on him. Shots ricocheted off the walls near him. He saw an open door and dived. He fastened the door with shivering hands, and turned around. His parents were bound to chairs. Behind them were militants, their guns ready to take the lives of his most beloved ones. It was all over.

Leroy woke up in cold sweat. The clock chimed 6 o’ clock. He got up, and splashed his face with cold water in the bathroom. He looked at himself. He wasn’t Leroy anymore. The past two weeks had been spent altering his appearance and the way he walked, talked and ate. He changed his clothes, looking like a respectable businessman instead of a burglar and walked down the stairs of his new dwelling place. Picking up the morning newspaper, he sat on the sofa and stretched his legs on the table; instead of his usual mannered ways. When he glanced at the headlines though, his heart skipped a beat.

There had been blasts in Croydon, Harper, Sanford and various other towns, massacring hundreds and injuring thousands. Ruthless militants had mercilessly gunned down anyone roaming on the streets. A level of Emergency had been declared in the nation. Leroy was horrified. This organisation had been planning big. And he knew that this was just the beginning. His racing thoughts were interrupted by a knock on the door. His bodyguard, or rather, his captor entered the room. “Your drive has come, Sir." With his head still aching from the shock, Leroy got into the car. “Where are we going?”, he asked the chauffeur. “You will know” was the reply.

After about 20 minutes of travelling, they reached a bungalow near a forest whose façade was so magnificent, it seemed to belong to someone filthy rich. And so it turned out to be. Leroy was startled to find it to be the President’s unofficial residence. He was welcomed and taken inside.

“Aha, General Vord, nice to meet you.”, President Richinagg greeted him, shaking his hand, which, in his childhood, he had dreamed of while getting the Bravery Award. But this was different. Leroy was spellbound. What had the President got to do with a terrorist organisation?! Now his mind was a complete mess, like a McDonald’s burger delivered carelessly. Then he remembered his mother’s words- It’s not long before he decides to destroy the whole community.

And then it all clicked together. There was no chance Richinagg was going to win the elections with the opposition being strongly backed. So he was going to eliminate all smaller communities to ensure he had no rival. Immersed in these thoughts, he sat on the couch opposite the President. Richinagg offered him a cigarette. Leroy reluctantly took it.

Now here came a problem. Leroy didn’t know anything about smoking other than that it was injurious to health. But this thing looked nothing like a scary spider or scorpion. Instead, it looked more like toilet paper. Nevertheless, he couldn’t help but ask “Does this bite?”. The President gave him a curious glance, and then shook his head and held up a lighter. Ready to get out of the awkward situation, Leroy held his cigarette out for him to light.

But still Leroy didn’t know what to do with the lit tube. But he guessed it had something to do with the smoke coming out. So, putting it in his left nostril, he blew it as hard as he could and a small flare erupted. Richinagg gave him a ‘What are you doing’ look, and then sighed. Leroy immediately took the cigarette out of his nose. “Vord, you are still shaken from the blast. Remember, I can give you all the money you want, but I can’t bribe the whole military. You need to keep a look out.” Leroy nodded and excused himself to the washroom. He locked the door from the inside.

Seeing the ventilator, it sparked an idea, the hope for an escape. He lifted the grill and put it as softly as he could on the floor. He cursed himself when it made some noise. There was a huge pounding on the door. Realising the situation, Leroy squeezed himself out of the mansion. There was a forest in front of him. He ran as fast as his legs could carry him. He could hear the sound of his captor distantly approaching him. That guy was too fast. He reached a patch surrounded by dense bushes. He suddenly braked, coming to a stop in front of a woman carrying an M16. It didn’t take a second for him to realise that she worked for the organisation. He could hear the man shuffling through the bushes behind him.

The lady lifted her rifle and aimed it at him…. Edited August 9, 2018 by P.4.R.K.O.U.R

[LOLKILLERTOTHEDEATH 1,921]

Approved!

 

Another great piece. You have used lots of vivid imagery and also managed to sprinkle in some humour (such as the cigarette part). I didn't find any real problems with the piece, barring a comma being present where it wasn't needed. Looking forward to the next one!

[thethiefofvictory 339]

Mmm, nice one! I like where this is going. Keep it up, I'll be waiting for Chapter 4!

[P.4.R.K.O.U.R 329]

Yay! Thanks Lolkiller, you are the best. Guess the thesaurus for captor got extinct.

Edited July 15, 2018 by P.4.R.K.O.U.R

[LOLKILLERTOTHEDEATH 1,921]

Yay! Thanks Lolkiller, you are the best. Guess the thesaurus for captor got extinct.

Thanks!

 

In regards to the captor synonym, sorry I couldn't find a good replacement. Captor captured I'm so punny what you meant and fit into the context perfectly. I mean there were words like Jailer, keeper and detainer, but Captor did the best job of those in capturing what you meant.

[P.4.R.K.O.U.R 329]

Would stalker have suited?

Also, KillerGnat admitted his mistake but is saying that he cannot repay me my prize since they have been given and he retired from reporter team. That's not fair. :'C

Edited July 15, 2018 by P.4.R.K.O.U.R

[LOLKILLERTOTHEDEATH 1,921]

Would stalker have suited?

Also, KillerGnat admitted his mistake but is saying that he cannot repay me my prize since they have been given and he retired from reporter team. That's not fair. :'C

I don't think stalker would be great. Stalker would be someone who follows you without your permission. Not sure about the second part though.

[P.4.R.K.O.U.R 329]

I don't think stalker would be great. Stalker would be someone who follows you without your permission. Not sure about the second part though.

Really disappointing. I mean, you can't do anything about it anyway, but it's just saddening.

I really needed the 20k for an upgrade.

[P.4.R.K.O.U.R 329]

This is why I skip over accounts really quickly. I don't rage quit, I get disappointed and quit.

Edit: Oops double post. My bad.

Edited July 15, 2018 by P.4.R.K.O.U.R

[thethiefofvictory 339]

he retired from reporter team. 

Uh... oh  :mellow:  :o

[P.4.R.K.O.U.R 329]

I didn't find any real problems with the piece, barring a comma being present where it wasn't needed.

Sorry, but, I, am, addicted, to, commas,

[thethiefofvictory 339]

Sorry, but, I, am, addicted, to, commas,

1. Revise your comma usage - you're using them way too often.

that was the first one that came to mind, and I was too lazy to find more

Edited July 16, 2018 by thethiefofvictory

[P.4.R.K.O.U.R 329]

Sorry, but, I, already, told, you, I, am, addicted, to, commas,

[P.4.R.K.O.U.R 329]

I didn't find any real problems with the piece, barring a comma being present where it wasn't needed.

“Your drive has come, Sir. With his head still aching...

 

No Grammar Nazis here?

[Person_Random 4,991]

Dang you are a good writer.

 

Wish I was that good...

[thethiefofvictory 339]

Dang you are a good writer.

 

Wish I was that good...

Learn... then? Write, read, practice, learn from others, take inspiration, etc. P.S any new to be published stories?

[P.4.R.K.O.U.R 329]

Not currently. Too busy for that.

[Person_Random 4,991]

Learn... then? Write, read, practice, learn from others, take inspiration, etc. P.S any new to be published stories?

You asking me? 

 

If you are...

Soon...  Please wait for assistance.  Editing story ideas and submitting.

 

Update: I have a new story idea, but I might not publish due to scholastics entry.

Edited July 26, 2018 by Person_Random

[P.4.R.K.O.U.R 329]

Lol. I have opened 4 containers so far on my newly made alt(including a black gold box) and what did I get? 50 drone battery pack 3 times and one 150 drone battery pack. I could incorporate this into a story.

Example: He took out his fishing line the last time from the water and let out a cry of joy. For the fifth time in a row, he had got a boot!

[P.4.R.K.O.U.R 329]

Changed font to trebuchet ms. Hope it looks better now.

[Person_Random 4,991]

Double post alerts!  Anyways, this topic is pretty popular parkour so don't sell yourself short.

[P.4.R.K.O.U.R 329]

No I actually am hearing complaints about odd formatting. Please tell me what is the problem which is going unnoticed.

[thethiefofvictory 339]

No I actually am hearing complaints about odd formatting. Please tell me what is the problem which is going unnoticed.

A: I heard somewhere that it's unwise to have two different people speaking in the same text wall. To be honest, I'll agree - it doesn't look particularly good.

 

B: I hate text walls. My own opinion. Don't change your style because a mult asked you to. 

[P.4.R.K.O.U.R 329]

I am always confused as to how to write a conversation.

And how can I break a text wall?

 

Edit: Is it a big problem? I was actually going to ask this in PM but it seemed something big, like a 'kick me' sticker stuck to my butt.

Edited August 11, 2018 by P.4.R.K.O.U.R

[Person_Random 4,991]

B: I hate text walls. My own opinion. Don't change your style because a mult asked you to. 

r u talking about me?

 

And not many ppl respond to my articles, unlike yours parkour

Edited August 11, 2018 by Person_Random