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ZOO KEEPER Tanki Online I was driving around in my mammoth one day and I noticed that one of the wasps had escaped from its pen! The pens are supposed to be tank proof you know, but a wasp can go flying when shot by an m3 hammer... anyway, me being a mammoth and everything, I wasn't very fast. I thought to myself, man, this is going to be difficult, catching a small, light, and fast tank with my big slow one. I got 5k crystals for catching it, but it would be way to hard. I changed the mission. What an easy job! :D 100 Words Exactly

Picture 2: Being a wasp is hard, You get pushed around and called a 'tard'. With low protection, it is hard to collect them (crystals), so when the gold falls, you get tossed into the walls, and the vikings take over. But sometimes, being fast is key, to get the gold to come to thee. But when you lag, you think all are fags when they steal the gold box from you. 70 words, hope mine wins!

Buy cry and Don't cry... :D

Ever since this came out i have been trying to rank as fast as possible! I ranked 3 times since they came out btw

As the three tanks watch the sunset, they slowly sink through the roof of the house they sit on. All but the main tank have a tiny amount of health taken away undoubtedly by and enemy tank. As for how they reached the roof, almost untouched, remains a mystery. These three wasps sit in suspense as they wait for the next enemy to attack. The two thunders, in the front so not to hurt themselves, protect their big weapon, the railgun. 81 words. --Replitaz_2

great story in my lower account, replitaz_3 people ask for gold almost constantly! it drives me nuts!

That 'noob' that Nobody can Seem to Beat Here on the Tanki Online news reporting station today, we have a story of an excellent tanker who nobody can seem to kill! So here is the story, a tank joins a Polygon CP battle with m2 dicator and m2 firebird - a pretty typical combo. He goes in to cap the point, but first puts on a double damage for good measure. He almost instantly destroys 3 of the 6 tanks that were sitting in the point. Just then, his armour starts failing... he drugs again, this time with a repair kit. As the point slowly changes from blue to red, the chat is flooded with words of hate in the Tanki world. "Noob drugger!", "Fak u fire", and "drugger fire". This goes on for about 5 minutes - with the dictator getting destroyed only a few times. Then a golden (that is really actually orange or brown) sign pops up at the top of the screen. Again, the chat is flooded with "gold!!", "no kill!", and "please let me have it!" (the low ranker). As the gold starts to fall, one could see repair kits being activated, people dying, and a dictator firebird approach the drop zone. With double damage, the tanker starts shooting and pushing. Hornets and wasps are being launched from the pile of slowly dying tanks, also destroyed by the deadly firebird. As the goldbox touches our friend the fire noob, once more, the chat is flooded with hate for that drugger firebird that nobody can seem to beat. --replitaz_2 well here is my story, i hope it isn't too long, (I didn't count the words) and I hope it is amusing to the tanki community.

You have been banned for illegaly banning someone for nothing

"I-I..." I stammered not knowing at all what to say. After all, I did kill his son, or so he tells me. "I am sorry about your son," it was pitiful, but it was a start. He lifted his head and I could see his face, wet with tears. There was one blue vein, popping out of his forhead. He was mad, that obviously was not the right thing to say. "Your sorry? YOUR SORRY?", he yelled at me. His vein grew bigger. He raised the hammer again, and all I did was close my eyes and stuck out my hand. I first heard the sound of my bones being crushed with the pure strength of the man. It was like when I was a little kid, my mom poured the milk onto my Rice Crispies. "I hear them mom, they are talking to me!" "Yes," she always said kindly, "can you tell me what they are saying?" And then i felt it. Pain exploded up my arms with so much force that I threw myself against the wall, and passing out. I woke up dripping with sweat and my arm still throbbing with the pain. A white sheet covered me and above me was a spider web of tubes, cords and other medical devices. At least he has the heart to put me into a hospital I thought. Suddenly the door burst open, I didn't even have to look to know it was the man. "I will tell you what happened," he started with an erie calmness to his voice. "And you probably wont remember any of it, because the grenade I threw at you launched you into the ceiling, head first. I am very surprised you didn't die instantly, you were lucky" I was really starting to get confused now. "But before I tell you, first tell me what you remember" "I saw a boy, the one you showed me, and then I remember picking up something as the boy lunged at me. I must have shot him, but not before he scratched me with something. Anyway, that was after I answered the door, and you were there. After I killed the boy, you threw a grenade at me, and then I was out." "Wow I am surprised, the syrum we gave you really works! Look at your hand!" I looked down and to my surprise, I saw that besides the redness and puffyness of the fingers, my hand was intact! "What syrum?" I asked again "I am a defencive designer for the army" he proudly stated, "infact, the head designer. I desiged a syrum that allowes a living being to heal extremely quicly. We weren't sure you would make it through this because before I tried to destroy your hand, I could see the cut on your arm beginning to bleed again. That is a sign of the syrum wearing off." He continued, "And if you are wondering why the scar didnt heal on your arm, it is because it doesnt heal fleash wounds. Only deep wounds, which will help soldiers be able to keep fighting, even if they take a blullet in one of the vital spots." It suddenly became clear in my head. I was an experiment. They tried to wipe my memory so I wouldnt remember my past! But the syrum worked so well that it was becomming clear. I remember arms reaching out to me, that had to be my mother's. Then the police took her away. I was then moved to an orphanage where I grew up. "But then who was that boy?" I asked "He wasnt actually my son," he put his head down, "he was another child from the orphanage" What was this world comming to? ***

I self destruct when i am on top of a tank, please fix this

How about making the chances of Gold Boxes dropping higher? :D