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ewww_its_a_fake_tank

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  1. ewww_its_a_fake_tank

    [Issue 48] Contest: Tanki Mythology

    The Creation of Freeze It was a time of fear. Of destruction. The Firebird had just been created. Some ***** had seen a phoenix in the game and called it a Fire-Bird. He played around with the Fire-Bird, creating a fearsome weapon. He showed it to his family, and the name stuck. Just like the fool who had found this weapon, any fool was able to use this weapon. Even without the rotation of this turret, a person could cause mass annihilation. The pros were horrified while the noobs sat in glory. Something had to be done. But the developers sat blindly, until one day, the king, Semyon Kirov, got a vision from the god Tanki. Tanki showed him the horrible murder happening. “You have to do something,” Tanki said in the vision, “You have to slow the Firebird down.” ... Semyon soon woke up and immediately went to the developers. They sat there in shocking realization at what they had done as Semyon ranted at them. “DO SOMETHING! You are destroying the gods and we will all be damned to hell if you don’t!” he screamed wildly. … The developers quickly acted and started discussing options. The tried various ideas but nothing worked. The firebird was too powerful. Soon, winter had come and everybody was depressed. They were convinced they had no solution. But they were wrong. Semyon had figured it out. He had to get the opposite of the Firebird. The opposite of fire - snow. He rejoiced and quickly headed to Brazil, where the stunning god Rio was located, He fended of many Firebirds, throwing snow at them, which immediately slowed them down, and then headed to the Sacred Building of Incarnation. There, he created a new turret with the help of the god of frost, Fris. The whole world rejoiced as King Semyon came out of the building, making firebirds useless. All the pros immediately equipped the new weapon, Freeze, destroying firebirds left and right. The gods basked in such power and talked happily about how the knew that making Semyon king was a good choice. Everybody was happy, as battles were no longer ruled by the power of the Phoenix. Everybody was happy, because they were was a new turret in town. Everybody was happy, because of the Freeze.
  2. ewww_its_a_fake_tank

    [Issue 48] Contest: Tanki Mythology

    Legend of Godmode_On In the start, it was only a empty haven. There was nothing in these beautiful maps, waiting to be filled. But then the god Tanki, owner and caretaker of these stunning maps, had a son. He named his son Torris. Torris roamed these empty maps, feeling lonely and alone. So he created something to give him company. Something beautiful, something great and powerful. He designed the tanks. For many days, he enjoyed looking at the tanks and driving them. But he was getting lonely again, and he realized what he needed. He needed drivers of these tanks, to share these magni things. He didn’t want to be the only one in this world; he wanted to have company and share his amazing invention. So Torris created another invention. Named Krystis, Torris created a god that could go into other realms and get more creatures to drive these tanks. He got creatures called Humans to drive tanks in exchange for one thing: a part of Torris’ soul called Crystalis, named after the god. It generated beautiful diamonds called crystals, which became the currency of the game. Now there was two gods, and Tanki became something more altogether. Tanki evolved from a god to a supergod because of what his world had become. But in this process, two new creatures formed inside of him. They were of little power to him and extremely annoying, so he threw them out. One of them was made of excess crystals and originated from Krystis. The other was just made of colors, and had originated from Torris’ servant Paints. They came into the hands of the humans. The humans, not knowing what power they had in their hands, performed experiments on them until one day they accidentally merged them into one. The name of this creature was Goldbock. … One day, Goldbock escaped the hands of the humans and went back in the game. In the game, it became a new god. The other gods didn’t like Goldbock, though, since he gave free crystals to the humans. They tried to destroy him, forgetting that all gods are immortal. In this bloody fight, they all got hurt and lost some parts of their soul. These parts combined to forge something extremely powerful and gave even more power to the humans. His name was Godmode_On. He inherited an extremely strong tank from Torris, and hidden crystals inside him for Goldbock and Krystis. … As soon as Godmode_On came into the battlefield the humans knew there was something different about him. When they tried to kill him, they figured it out. He wasn’t a human - he was a god. But when he died, from the remains his body, leaked out some of Krystis’s powers, coming in the form of three of Goldbock servants, named Goldboxes. ... From then on, the humans stayed happy, drunk in such power and the gods lived in harmony, learning their lesson and never giving more power to humans again.
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