Application for: "The Gold Dropper"
Applicant Number: #0000four0
[THINGS WE NEED TO KNOW ABOUT YOU]
• What is your first and last name?
My name is Thisis Notaname.
• Where are you from?
My Mom.
• Where were you born?
Earth.
• How old are you?
I'm 21 in dog years.
• What would consider your greatest strength?
Catching Gold Boxes.
• What would you consider your greatest weakness?
Catching Gold Boxes.
[THINGS WE NEED TO KNOW IF YOU KNOW ABOUT GOLD BOXES]
• What is the color of the Gold Box?
Oh thats easy, Its gree-
• Why should we hire you instead of someone else?]
Because Hopper players want me to run for president.
• How can we trust you with an unlimited amount of gold boxes?
.....
• Hypothetically, If one of your friends we're running low on crystals and they asked you to drop them about 34.5 Gold Boxes, what would you do?
.....
• What do you think the average amount of Gold Boxes should be dropped per day?
Hey. Sorry about that, I had to use the bathroom.
[THINGS WE NEED TO KNOW ABOUT YOUR GENERALMINDSET AND EDUCATION]
• Can you read?
That's strike one with the big words, I don't know what "read" means.
• Whats the highest level of education that you have completed?
I dropped out of 4th grade because Mrs. Limpkiss said I didn't color so good, and the highest number I can count to is 4.
• Do you have a scholarship? (Degree, PhD, Masters)
I have a Degree in Examining Gold Boxes t̶h̶a̶t̶ I̶ d̶e̶f̶i̶n̶i̶t̶e̶l̶y̶ d̶i̶d̶n̶t̶ d̶r̶a̶w̶ w̶i̶t̶h̶ c̶r̶a̶y̶o̶n̶s̶
• What was your highest score on an IQ Test?
It was -3, But I did call to get it fixed and fortunately it was successfully changed to a 1.000000002!
• What do you think about the benefits?
All i really care about are the Community Managers giving me high.... er... what comes after 4?
[THINGS WE NEED TO KNOW ABOUT YOU GETTING THIS POSITION]
• How long do you plan on keeping this job?
About 2 years.
• Do you think you'll get the job?
Absolutely..... *cough*
• That's all the questions we needed, thank you.
That's strike two with the big words.