tanki jokes

[BlitzPanzer12345 241]

To Post #73.

Me or actual lightning?

User or actual thunder?

thunder , the gun in TO

[BlitzPanzer12345 241]

How a tanker thanks another tanker ?

"Tanks a lot"

[ThouShallNot 963]

what did the noob buy crystsls? to be better, meh whatever that joke sucked right

[BlitzPanzer12345 241]

what did the noob buy crystsls? to be better, meh whatever that joke sucked right

thats a joke ?

[r_LightningStrike120 8]

Why does Zeus uses Thunder?

It goes along with his master bolt.

 

What's an ice cream truck's favourite weapon?

Freezer. Why?

To protect it's ice cream.

Edited July 8, 2014 by r_LightningStrike120

[Guestguestguest 6]

Some new chat commands will be implemented soon ( :excl:  please don't try them at home):

\vote (nickname of player) : with this command you vote for the president of Tankionline. (i'm not a candidate, though) ^_^

Ctrl+Alt+Canc (x 2 times) : with this command, when your team is winning, you will get 5000 free crystals. ;)
\addcarrots 9999 : turns Tankionline into Farmville. With spacebar you'll plant carrots, z to water them, x to harvest them. :blink:

\dohomework : this function does all your homework while you're playing tanki. After the battle press "print" and you'll get all your homework done and printed. Note: good marks are not guaranteed. :rolleyes:

\eatvegetables : your tank will eat your salad. This trick is not recommended for vegetarian players.

\add$tobankaccount (insert amount) : the tanki's staff will be charged with the inserted amount, and in your bank account will be added the same sum. :P

\x-ray_view : allows you to see through buildings, and also through dresses. Not recommended if granny is around. :unsure:

\derankizator : demote enemy's rank. Lasts one hour. During that period the tanks you hit will lose both health and ranks. For example you hit once a WO4 he'll become WO3, you hit twice will become WO2, and so on until recruit. :ph34r: 

\hippielize : your tank will shoot flowers instead of projectiles :wub:

\hip_hop : adds 4 powerful loudspeakers plus a sub-woofer to your tank and noise-sensitive springs to its caterpillars. That will make it impossible for you to hit enemies, but while they'll see you incoming with a rythm-jumping hip-hop-ized tank they'll think you're very cool. B)

[echo_bravo_alpha_111 12]

What does the hunter say to the mammoth

 

 

im going to hunt you

 

[r_LightningStrike120 8]

Why did the tankers use Scope after they brush their teeth?

 

Because they needed to rinse out their teeth!

 

Edited October 19, 2014 by r_LightningStrike120

[r_LightningStrike120 8]

Why should you not stand under a tree in a lightning storm?

I'll get out my Thunder and shoot you!

What did the Hornet say to the Wasp?

"Hi cousin!"

 

Edited October 28, 2014 by r_LightningStrike120

[Cutie_Girl_Pro 6]

Sorry this is not tanki joke. 

 

Once there was a lake. Someone dropped an axe inside accidentally, and a goddess came out, saying I have a golden, silver, wooden axe. Which  is yours?

The man said: the wooden axe.

The goddess said: you are so honest, so I will give you all of them.

 

Later after people know the story.....

*Splash* Someone throws axe in the lake on purpose.

The goddess said: whose axes are these? there's a golden one, silver one and wooden one.

The greedy person:They're mine!

The goddess: why the hell did you chop off my arm?

The greedy person: oh no oh no.

 

The goddess throws three axes. The wooden one bounces off, but the gold and silver axe killed him. 

[r_LightningStrike120 8]

 

 

Sorry this is not tanki joke. 

 

Once there was a lake. Someone dropped an axe inside accidentally, and a goddess came out, saying I have a golden, silver, wooden axe. Which  is yours?

The man said: the wooden axe.

The goddess said: you are so honest, so I will give you all of them.

 

Later after people know the story.....

*Splash* Someone throws axe in the lake on purpose.

The goddess said: whose axes are these? there's a golden one, silver one and wooden one.

The greedy person:They're mine!

The goddess: why the hell did you chop off my arm?

The greedy person: oh no oh no.

 

The goddess throws three axes. The wooden one bounces off, but the gold and silver axe killed him. 

:o

 

Edited October 29, 2014 by r_LightningStrike120

[jokersus.cava 1,503]

What did a Mammy say to a Wasp?

 

vroom (engine sound)

 

meh, that's not funny, just press the green button and I'll be happy

 

 

Edited October 30, 2014 by jokersus.cava

[Pride.ln.Blood 1,065]

What did the wasp said to mammoth?

You are just a fatty :P

[Shaloo7 1,216]

What did the Wasp say to the Mammoth?

 

 

Ever heard the story of the ant and the elephant?

 

 

[r_LightningStrike120 8]

Player has been banned. Reason: flame.

[r_LightningStrike120 8]

Nice picture. Did he get hit by a Lightning Strike? 

Yeah. Nice joke. Player has been banned. Reason: flaming.

Edited November 8, 2014 by r_LightningStrike120

[PowerStrike1.1 270]

Tanki ASDF;

"Everyone do the flip!" [every tank does the flip]

[egmarkgone 4]

 

:fire_r:  :fire_l:

(theyregreat)

 

(toodamnhigh)

 

(tree)

 

(troll)

 

(truestory)

 

(trump)

(turkey)

 

(twss)

 

(tyrion)

 

(tywin)

 

(unacceptable)

 

(unknown)

 

(upvote)

 

(vote)

(waiting)

 

(washington)

 

(wat)

 

(whoa)

 

(whynotboth)

 

(wtf)

 

(yey)

 

(yodawg)

(youdontsay)

 

(yougotitdude)

 

(yuno)

 

(zoidberg)

 

[egmarkgone 4]

(ceilingcat)

 

(celeryman)

 

(cereal)

 

(cerealspit)

 

(challengeaccepted)

 

(chef)

 

(chewie)

 

(chocobunny)

(chompy)

 

(chucknorris)

 

(clarence)

 

(coffee)

 

(confluence)

 

(content)

 

(continue)

 

(cookie)

(cornelius)

 

(corpsethumb)

 

(daenerys)

 

(dance)

 

(dealwithit)

 

(derp)

 

(disappear)

 

 

My  Emotion  is best

[egmarkgone 4]

:-D

[egmarkgone 4]

 

[genak138 950]

Players Wasp-Fire and Fire-Wasp have been banned reason: Flame Wars

:rolleyes:  :rolleyes:  :rolleyes:  :rolleyes:  :rolleyes:  :rolleyes:  :rolleyes:  :rolleyes:  :rolleyes:  :rolleyes:  :rolleyes:  :rolleyes:  :rolleyes:  :rolleyes:  :rolleyes:  :rolleyes:  :rolleyes:  :rolleyes:  :rolleyes:  :rolleyes:  :rolleyes:  :rolleyes:  :rolleyes:  :rolleyes:  :rolleyes:  :rolleyes:  :rolleyes:  :rolleyes:  

Edited February 12, 2015 by genak138

[bittu_unbeatable_XXX 2]

what does  freeze say to firebird

you are a hot girl u cant kill me i am cool man i kill u. and you can **** only

 

[m6ttetu 288]

!st Tankeman: Do u like potatoes?

2nd Tankman: No.

Ahahahaha!

:D

[m6ttetu 288]

What does Thunder say to Isida?

 

Nothing