Puns

[NewbieCake 3,067]

Did you hear about the movie called "Constipated?" I heard it's coming out soon.

Edited May 6, 2015 by NewbieCake

[pizzaslad 471]

What's the difference between my jokes and a pizzaman's?

 

They can never be topped

[ThouShallNot 963]

Pronounce this: good eye might, 

now you sound like an ausie.

[NewbieCake 3,067]

I had a joke about amnesia, but then I forgot it.

[NatchGa 665]

How did the Hipster burn his tongue?

 

He drank his coffee before it was cool.

 

MEEEE OMG

[NatchGa 665]

My Grandpa said, "Your generation relies too much on technology!" I replied, "No, your generation relies too much on technology!" Then I unplugged his life support.

[Nltobh 498]

My Grandpa said, "Your generation relies too much on technology!" I replied, "No, your generation relies too much on technology!" Then I unplugged his life support.

thats messed up but funny 

[Raredust 454]

I would tell you a joke about butter, but I don't want to spread it.

[T.O.T.A.L.W.A.R 581]

My Grandpa said, "Your generation relies too much on technology!" I replied, "No, your generation relies too much on technology!" Then I unplugged his life support.

xaxaxaxaxaxaxaxax

[BlitzPanzer12345 241]

What happened when Bob , who waz reading a newspaper , waz blown up by a bomb ?

Ans. He waz all over the news

[aperaiderpistol 459]

"My friend went away to work as a mime artist. After that, I never heard from him again."

 

"I was warned about the dangers of lollipop ladies, but I guess I never saw the signs."

 

"Pins are dangerous, yes, I see your point."

 

"I have no idea weather or not it will rain tomorrow."

 

"I found out that I had to actually pay for my satellite dish. They said it would be on the house."

 

"I cannot be trusted with money in my household. No change there."

Edited May 11, 2015 by aperaiderpistol

[Nltobh 498]

knock,knock... 

who's there? 

amos. 

amos who? 

a mosquito.

[Strawwitz 86]

 A post about puns is  very redundant.

Edited May 12, 2015 by Strawwitz

[aperaiderpistol 459]

Here's another one:

 

Did you hear about the horse that had an accident? I heard he's in a stable condition.

[vanshajwore 324]

Do you want to hear a sodium hydrogen joke ?

NaH

Potassium.

[golden5648 1,686]

An old lady in the park asked me to buy milk for her ugly child, later I got to know she's a ghost