[Forum Game]Rate the Joke ! Write the Joke

[Boeing_787 1,455]

10/10

 

What did the plane say to the bad pilot as he was landing?

 

50...40...30...20...******!...******!

it actually means to reduce engine power, not an insult. It is an automatic warning

 

 

Edited June 20, 2017 by Boeing_787

[CabbageRoll 3,018]

9000/10

 

i stole this from jokes.cc.com -dark humor -bill gates in hell

 

 

 

Bill Gates goes to purgatory.

 

St. Peter says, "Now Bill, you have done some good things, and you have done some bad things. Now I am going to let you decide where you want to go".

 

First, St. Peter shows Bill an image of Hell with beautiful women running on beaches. Then, St Peter shows Bill an image of Heaven with robed angels playing harps on clouds.

 

Bill chooses Hell.

 

About a week later, St. Peter checks in on Bill in Hell and finds him being whipped by demons.

 

Bill says to St. Peter, "What happened to all the beautiful women and the beaches?"

 

St. Peter replies, "That was just the screen saver."

[BRO0088 1,724]

9/10

 

One day a Joker was laughing.

[abskpr 7]

0.0135/0.2156

 

I don't understand how can people not take a bath for a month, i get itching all over my body at 25th day itself.

[colindestroyer77 45]

2/5

 

Want to hear a word I just made up?

Plagiarism.

[r_Bangla1 52]

Haha, 10/10

 

Jack and Jill were visiting a zoo. Suddenly, a monkey farts at Jack.

[colindestroyer77 45]

1/10 Honestly!

 

When I see a lovers' initials carved into a tree, I don't think of it as anything sweet. I'm simply surprised that so many people bring knives on a date.

[r_Bangla1 52]

10/10

 

Why did the chicken cross the road?

It decided to leave Tanki.

[colindestroyer77 45]

7/10

 

What is 8-4. If you say 4, you are wrong. If you take away the four from the equation, the eight is all that is left. (eight-four). Therefore 8-4 = 8.

[r_Bangla1 52]

3/10

 

Q: What’s the difference between a copilot and a jet engine?

A: The jet engine stops whining when the plane shuts down.

[colindestroyer77 45]

10/10

 

Woman: Andy, do you think I am a bad mother

Child: My name is Drew, Mom.

[r_Bangla1 52]

9/10

 

Why did a chicken run out of the Tanki office?

 

I don't know.

 

[SprayGround 2,851]

Inactive.

Reopened.

[The-Best-Tanker101 42]

Thank you sir!

 

......

 

A teacher to a student:

"Tomorrow come with ur parents,ur mother and especially ur father"

[The-Best-Tanker101 42]

Eee well did u make it on ur own? .. 9/10 

 

Once a pt teacher took students to ground..

 

Sir said to them :

             

                  "Please make a straight circle" 

[21985_the_master 422]

8/10 Ithink that is better on your language.

 

 

One day the teacher asked the students:

what God said to create light?

And The-Best-Tanker101 said:

TURN ON THE LIGTHS!!!!

[The-Best-Tanker101 42]

:P 10/10

 Why r ghosts so bad at lying ?

 

Bcoz u can see right throught them

[21985_the_master 422]

5/10 you can do better m8

 

 

Why The-Best-Tanker101 stopped his car?

-OMG lag

[The-Best-Tanker101 42]

4/10 Be more creative

 

Once John & Smith went to a Cafe and they ordered a hot coffee of $20..

 

John : Hey Smith,drink ur coffee fast or else we would hv to pay more

 

Confused Smith : Why do u say so?

 

John: Bcoz if u drink it slow it will get cold

 

Smith : So?

 

John : Oh dear! Look there,its written on the board cold coffee "$30"

[Crip 4,735]

3/10

 

---

 

An Englishman, a Scotsman and an Irishman went to see a forester to get a job. "Ok", said the forester. "Whoever cuts down the most trees in a day gets the job".

 

So, all three went out and did a full day of chopping. When the evening came, the forester asked each man how many trees he had cut down. The Englishman had cut down 20, the Scotsman 30 and the Irishman 175.

 

"Wow!" exclaimed the forester. "Where did you learn to cut down trees like that?"

 

"I learnt to do it in the Sahara", said the Irishman.

 

"There aren't any trees in the Sahara", said the forester, raising an eyebrow.

 

"There aren't any now."

[21985_the_master 422]

9/10

 

 

The-Best-Tanker101,Coldplay and 21985_the_master died and they went to hell.

Then the satan said:Alright i am going to hit you with thisgun 3 times and if you scream i am going to take you with me,if not you are going to heaven.But you can take something like shield to protect yourself.

So The-Best-Tanker101 took a huge rock as a shield but satan with the first shot took the rock away and with the second he screamed.

Then it was Coldplays turn and he said:I took yoga lessons for 15 years and iam not going to take shield bacause i dont feel any pain.

And so 3 shots and nothing happend so he went to heaven.

Then it was 21985_the_masters turn and satan said: what shield you want to take?

 

Coldplay

[The-Best-Tanker101 42]

xD 10/10

 Teacher: what do u call a person who cannot hear anything?

Santa: U can call him anything, because he cannot hear anything.

 

[21985_the_master 422]

9/10 heard that before but in greek.Good choise!!!

 

 

Teacher:Alright kids how many were jesus students? Coldplay can you tell us?

But he didnt knew and then The-Best-Tanker101 told him :Dude just like the hours of the clock

And Coldplay answered: Half past eleven Miss!!!

[The-Best-Tanker101 42]

8/10...do u make it all by urself?

 

Teacher :"Anyone who thinks he is a stupid may standup!"

* Nobody stands up *

Teacher : "I m sure there r some stupids over here "

 

* Little Johnny stands up *

Teacher : "Ohh Jonnhy,u think u r a stupid?"

Johnny : "No mam..i just feel bad that u r standing alone"

Edited October 10, 2017 by The-Best-Tanker101

[21985_the_master 422]

good 9/10 and no the previous was a greek one.
 
 
how do you call GuidoFawkes when he puts his hand on fire?

-stupid

Edited October 10, 2017 by 21985_the_master