[Story] Anima (Part 1)

[Kuhaku 87]

Hello! I_Am_Unkown here with Anima Part 1. Please feel free to comment below any suggestions or tips!! There is one new term in the Glossary. Also, please note that everything in the fancy font is important information that you, as the reader should know.

 

 

Index

 

Story Reveal + Prologue

 

 

The Eight Races

1. Human

2. Elf

3. Warlock

4. Goblin

5. Troll

6. Fairy

7. Dwarf

8. Anima

 

Glossary

• Forenia

  • The planet in which the eight races live.

• Humans

  • The species that are currently the leaders of Forenia. Miraculously, they won the war and was able to end the war. Although they cannot emit magical power, they are masters at creating weapons and tools that use magical power. Humans live all throughout Forenia.

• Elf

  • This species competed in the war, but lost. About half the leaders wanted to end the war, but the other half didn’t. This led to a split in the race, the Dark Elves, and the Elves. They can use magic power emitted from their bodies. The Elves are close allies with Humans, but the same cannot be said for the Dark Elves. Elves live all throughout Forenia.

• Warlock

  • This dangerous species is a master at sorcery. Sorcery is generally more powerful than magic. This species did compete in the war, but lost. They now live in the country Aswarulden, although some live in other countries.

• Goblins

  • Crafty creatures that are hard to see.  Greedy, yet intelligent, this species not only participated in the war, but also was able to have a small piece of land to themselves, not governed by Humans. However, some Goblins do live among the other races. Cannot emit magic from their bodies, but use weak magical weapons. As they lack great physical strength.

• Troll

  • Creatures that aren’t very intelligent, but have tons of strength. They lack the ability to both use magical weapons as well as use magic. Did not participate in war as they thought that it was pointless.

• Fairy

  • Beautiful creatures that can use magic as well as sorcery. They participated in the war, but lost. Some resent the humans but mostly, this species live among the humans and are allies with them. They have great magical power, but can also use magical weapons if needed.

• Dwarf

  • These creatures lost the war and then went into hiding. Only the leaders meet with the other races once a year at the Summit. They can only use sorcery.

• Anima

  • Legendary creatures, rarely seen. Little is known about them except for the fact that they can use magical weapons, sorcery, and magic. The only race that can fly naturally without the help of magical weapons. Did not participate in the war, only one Anima meets with the other races at the summit once a year.

• Summit

  • A yearly meeting that all races are attended to meet peacefully. The leaders discuss anything from a natural disaster, to large problems occurring in the country.

• Altedemia

  • A computer world in which the first world war as well as any other wars will take place. After the war, Altedemia was open to public use for almost everything. From video games to the Summit, many races spent most of their lives here.

• Ranks in Altedemia

  • Almost everyone plays games and participates in tournaments in Altedemia. As a result, almost everyone has a rank. The higher your rank, the better you are. The higher you are, the better jobs you can obtain, the more power you have, the more popularity you have, more money; almost everything comes from these rank.

    • Rank 1: Corvexx

      • About 0.0001% of the world’s population are at this rank.

    • Rank 2: Night Walkers

      • About 2% of the world’s population are at this rank.

    • Rank 3: Ninoxide

      • About 5% of the world’s population are at this rank.

    • Rank 4: Sari

      • About 8% of the world’s population are at this rank.

    • Rank 5: Centurion

      • About 15% of the world’s population are at this rank.

    • Rank 6: Aeon

      • About 25% of the world’s population are at this rank.

    • Rank 7: Akul

      • About 45% of the world’s population are at this rank.

 

Human - Jason

 

I woke up with a start, knowing that the day was going to be a long one. I had to finish a long series of chores before I could see the Elites train.

 

 

The Elites were Human warriors that used magical weapons. As magical weapons are incredibly expensive and hard to make, in order to become an Elite, you must be among the leaders in Altedemia - the computer world.

 

 

Quickly, I finished my chores and ran to the stadium where I could watch the Elites train. I saw a guard, one that I knew - his name was Arcol.

 

 

Name: Arcol

Race: Human,  Male

Age: 22

Current Rank in Altedemia: Centurion

 

 

Acol spoke,”Well Jason, having another day watching the Elites train?”

 

“Well I dunno, one day, when I’m an Elite, I’m gonna rub it in your face every single day”, we both smiled as we knew this was true. We had known each other for quite a while, and we often battled in Altedemia.

 

 

Name: Jason

Race: Human, Male

Age: 17

Current Rank in Altedemia: Centurion

 

 

I hurried into the stadium where I could watch the Elites train. I watched it almost everyday for the past three years, hoping I could one day join them. Once I was 19, I would send in my application to hopefully join the Elites and begin training.

 

 

The Elites were the ones to fight in the war. In order to make up for the inability to use magic, they must train endlessly with magical weapons. But because magical weapons are incredibly hard to master, as well as require a large amount of physical strength, only top ranks in Altedemia can enter. Typically speaking, the required rank to join the Elites is Centurion. Only one Ninoxide ever joined the Elites.

 

 

Amazing. I watched in awe as the champion Elite, Krul, went past me. He was using his common weapon: a Bi Tonic, one of the hardest weapons to master, and also one of the deadliest.

 

 

Name: Krul

Race: Human, Male

Age: 28

Current Rank In Altedemia: Ninoxide

 

 

After an hour of training with his Bi Tonic, he entered into the Altedemia arena, where he could fight his comrades, without physically injuring him. It amazed me to no end how quickly he could respond to his opponents attacks using his Ninoxide.

 

 

A variety of magical weapons are used in the Elites. However ultimately, when becoming an Elite, you are required to create your own weapon. These weapons can vary as there is no set standard, the only limit is the user’s brain.

When entering Altedemia, you are placed in a cylinder tube where a computer scans everything inside it. Then you are digitally transported into Altedemia, where everything inside the cylinder is coded and put into Altedemia. This can include weapons, food, clothing, supplies, virtually anything as long as it can fit inside the cylinder.

 

 

When a comrade attacked him, his Bi Tonic would glow and a fight would begin. Although a lot of people were at similar skill to each other, Krul was a legendary fighter. He is a legend, a brilliant fighter and leader of the Elites. His weapon was a sword with magical abilities. I realized that not only did he bear the physical burden of his weapon, but also the burden of his comrades trust. The Elites knew Krul as a leader, a man who you could always trust, the face of our humanity. But we all knew that in a fight between him and another species, say Elf, or Dwarf, or Fairy, he would be doomed.

 

But that’s the very reason I hope to become an Elite. Better to join the fight then to watch it. One day, I would become an Elite, and be able to beat any other race.

Edited May 6, 2017 by Kuhaku

[Hex 11,520]

Approved!

 

 

Edits:-

 

1. Looks like you wrote this one in a hurry - which is okay on side but becomes vulnerable to a lot of mistakes. I have corrected some five grammatical errors, one spelling.

2. Following the above point, two rephrases have been made where the original sentence made no sense at all.

3. Standardized font to Trebuchet M3S, font size 14.

4. Italicized and profiles changed to ease distinctness.

 

 

Feedback:

 

Well written, enjoyed but I do think you need to write a bit more in each part, because as far as this story's going, it will be a big story.

 

So, in a nutshell:

 

 

Edited May 5, 2017 by Hexed

[Kuhaku 87]

Please don't add the *** each time I add in the special note.

 

I'm trying to keep the format exactly the same every post, as I'm writing this on a doc, and copy + paste it into here.

 

Thanks

[T3est 17]

well that's a good one

[pieface101 285]

A few clarifications:

 

Is Corvexx or Akul the highest rank? Because normally very few people are at the highest rank (like very few generals in the military, but a lot of privates and sergeants), which suggests Corvexx, but from the information, Corvexx is only rank 1 while Akul is rank 7.

 

Also, second question. Krul uses a Bi Tonic, right? so 

 

After an hour of training with his Ninoxide, he entered into the Altedemia arena, where he could fight his comrades, without physically injuring him. It amazed me to no end how quickly he could respond to his opponents attacks using his Ninoxide.

this part doesn't make sense.  :huh:

 

Looking forward to the new series, though.

[fe4f3 1,002]

[*Insert Unknown expressions here*]

 

Well written!

 

[Kuhaku 87]

A few clarifications:

 

Is Corvexx or Akul the highest rank? Because normally very few people are at the highest rank (like very few generals in the military, but a lot of privates and sergeants), which suggests Corvexx, but from the information, Corvexx is only rank 1 while Akul is rank 7.

 

Also, second question. Krul uses a Bi Tonic, right? so 

 

this part doesn't make sense.  :huh:

 

Looking forward to the new series, though.

Thank you very very much for catching my mistake!!

 

To clarify, Corvexx is the highest rank, with only a small number of Altedemia users at this rank.

In addition to this, Akul is the lowest rank with about 45 percent of Altedemia users at this rank. This means that generally speaking, about 1 in every 2 people are at this rank.

 

Rank 1 means that you are the highest rank. Take Tanki Online for example, before the Legend Update, Generalissimo was the highest rank you could obtain, while Recruit was the lowest rank. Everyone who just joins tanki online is automatically at this rank. Likewise, Corvexx is the highest rank you can reach in Altedemia, while Akul is the standard rank that everyone has.