Old Man Logan: Renewed Part One

[tankawesome_3000 0]

Logan woke up, he looked at his chest. Where a cut should’ve been there was a scar that was slowly fading.

 

“I should be dead,” Logan thought to himself. Just then something dug into his back.

 

“Ahh!” he screamed.

 

He quickly threw off his assailant. He looked around, his genetic duplicate was missing, meaning he like Wolverine had also healed and had run after stabbing him once. Logan was getting up, but all of a sudden was stopped, something tugged his body, he felt like he was being ripped apart. Then it stopped, and his vision went Black.

 

Logan woke up in a long corridor on a metal examination table, his hands and feet tied by two pieces of Metal, and an odd thing covering the place where his claws would come out. He tried using his claws, but they wouldn’t come out, just then a woman walked in the room.

 

“Morning Logan,” she said to him.

 

“Who are you?” Logan asked.

 

“You don’t need to know my name.” The woman told him.

 

“You just need to know that my boss wants me to run a few tests and see if you’re fit to do what he wants.”

 

“What if I don’t want to do what he wants?”

 

“Oh, you will do what I want if you want ever to see your daughter again.” A gruff voice replied to Logan, out of the shadows. He knew that voice but from where?

 

The woman came closer and poked Logan with a needle, then she took some blood. Immediately the area where he had been poked closed.

 

“Impressive it appears as though your regeneration capabilities are coming back,” she told him.

 

“That’s impossible” Logan replied,”Mister Yashida made sure of that after I killed him.”

 

“ Oh yes we know all about your incident in Japan, to be honest, we’ve been tracking you for years.” she replied.”Master Yashida didn’t poison you though, he just put a microchip in your bloodstream, when he stabbed you. This was his contingency plan in case you killed him it made sure to attack your cells and lower their healing factor.”

 

“So it poisoned me?’ Logan asked.

 

“In a sense, yes, but it was just slowing your healing factor down, not destroying it.” She answered. “Then in your most recent battle with X-24, his stabbing ended up hitting the microchip, causing it to malfunction which restored your healing factor.”

 

“Enough chatting Doctor,” the man said. “Can he do it or not?”

 

“After a thorough analysis of his blood, it appears that yes he is adequate for your job sir.”

 

“Fantastic!” the voice exclaimed. A silhouette of a man slowly came forth.

 

“Hello Logan, it’s been a while.” Victor came forth.

[LOLKILLERTOTHEDEATH 1,921]

Approved!

 

Certainly an interesting read. I find your fascination with Wolverine fascinating. I do assume that this follows from the Logan timeline in the movies. Nevertheless, I did find a few things that you certainly could improve.

 

• Grammar: This seemed to be somewhat lacklustre. The piece would have been much more enjoyable if this aspect was taken care of. I found a single instance where your meaning was completely obsucred with numerous other cases where there were slight grammar problems. You don't have to spend hours proof-reading your article, but reading it out loud once (to help you find any places where your meaning is obscured) and using editing software (such as Grammarly) will greatly fix this.
• Format: This isn't that important, but I highly recommend that you format your article better. The way you put together some lines was quite bizzare, for starters. If you are unaware of this, the forum standard for text is Trebutchet MS with font size 14, unless you are writing a header or a footer.
• Try to develop the plot more: I personally feel that this was something of a problem. Through the story, it felt like you were just trying to justify why Logan came back to life (or never died, as you put it). I would highly recommend that you focus on developing the plot more by, perhaps. Nonetheless, you did include his daughter, but that was indeed to the very end of your article.

 

Welcome to the AWS!  

[thethiefofvictory 339]

Welcome! Nice story, keep it up!

[Chronicle 164]

Nicely written, I'm intrigued. There has to be a part two of some sort right? 

[Quarks 2,255]

Approved!

 

Certainly an interesting read. I find your fascination with Wolverine fascinating.

Way to use that big vocabulary of yours effectively ;)