The tanker who became a Lone Wolf

[TankiNoob2000 231]

A tanker simply named "Wolf" didn't like team modes so that's why he only played DM. His Healer kit always kept him handy during battles. He never ever teamed up with someone and had no friends. He was always a serious tanker.

It all came to be in CTF Bridges where Wolf's teammate was about to die with the flag. His teammate said: "Please, heal me. I can't take anymore shots." Wolf simply ran off and said: "I don't care. I have others to take out." His selfishness eventually bought the downfall of his team that lost 6-0. All of Wolf's teammates asked the same thing "Why don't you contribute to the team?" Wolf just said "Because I'm a Lone Wolf." He ended up leaving shortly after.

In Yorkshire TDM, he saw one of his teammates about to die while saying: "Just a couple meters. I gotta keep going!" Wolf took the Repair kit and refused to heal his teammate while the teammate replied with: "Please. I beg you!" Wolf ignored him by driving away from him while saying "Don't expect me to help you out anytime soon."

In Assault, he would help out the defending team instead of his own team and he would help out the attacking team instead of defending. Everyone got so sick of him that they all decided to vote him. Wolf simple said "Vote me if you want. I don't care!" He ended up leaving after.

In Deathmatch, many of the other tankers saw how impressive he was and asked: "Can we team Wolf?" Wolf simply killed them and killed all those who opposed him. More than 20 people sent a friend request to Wolf and he simply declined it and sent a dislike to everyone asking for a request saying: "I don't need friends. Beat it and move on." All the tankers who received his heart message were sad and unhappy with it.

Wolf was by himself until an old rival came in. He asked: "I remember you bud. Can we be friends?" Wolf simply replied with: "I don't need friends. Get out of my sight right now!" His rival said: "What's wrong?" Wolf simply killed him and drove past. His rival tried to block him but yet again Wolf killed him. He left after all of this.

He decided to go to DM once more but his old rival followed him. Wolf slaughtered everyone in the battle along with his old rival who said: "Please...." Wolf shot him and his old rival died with the others. He saw all the dead tanks and walked away saying to himself, "There are people who can walk away. I'll let them walk. I don't need anyone that wants to be friends to talk to me. Their destiny is never tied to mine." He walked away shortly after and vanished.

[Flexoo 6,980]

Approved.

 

Edits:

- Minor grammar edits and mistakes were fixed, like double use of certain words, or "so" instead of the verb "saw".

- Use a colon or comma before quotations.

 

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Okay, this might be just slightly better than your previous piece, but it's still quite simplistic if you ask me. The quotations were overused just like their introductions; "He said", "He asked" etc. I see you've made another story that is not yet approved, so I would suggest you to take your time and work on perfecting your pieces before moving to another one. There is no need to hurry. We are not closing anytime soon. Quality always beats quantity.

[P.4.R.K.O.U.R 329]

I agree with what @Flexoo said. Also, instead of literally spoon-feeding the reader with details, try to mix them up in the story.

For example, you wrote: "A tanker simply named "Wolf" didn't like team modes so that's why he only played DM. His Healer kit always kept him handy during battles."

A better version would be: "After 9 minutes of intense battling, Silence DM ended with a Healer kit combo topping the list with 70 kills. "Wolf", as he was called, hated playing in team modes.