Slender Man Returns: Part 3

[TankiNoob2000 231]

I woke up again, tied to a bed. Jonathan was sitting next to me. I asked John what happened, and he took a deep breath and replied, "I had to knock you out again because you saw Slender Man."  The doctor that I wounded came in with an ice pack and a band aid on his nose. I told him, "Sorry for injuring you. Apparently Slender Man is becoming more and more dangerous." The doctor forgave me for hitting him and untied me so I could get my phone. I ended up playing a couple matches of Tanki mobile on my phone until my battery died. I put my phone on charge and decided to go to sleep. I looked at the clock before I fell asleep. 3 AM.

 

I woke up to a tap from one of the doctors that told me, "You're going home!" I took a big sigh of relief because I was looking forward to being back home again. The doctor gave me my clothes and I went in and changed. One person I didn't see was Johnathan. "Where's John?" I asked. The doctor simply said, "He left already. He's back at his house." I shrugged and started to walk out of the room. I managed to go down the flight of stairs and when I looked to my right, Slender Man was standing at the end of a long hallway. I stared at him until a doctor tapped my shoulder. "You ok?" I shook my head and then he was gone. "Yeah." I asked and I went outside of the hospital and I got inside of my car and started driving away.

 

I was home in 20 minutes. Johnathan saw me and he waved to me. I waved back at him and went inside my house. I took a good long breath, changed into my home clothes and sat on my couch. There was a game between the Philadelphia Eagles and the Dallas Cowboys. It was only the 2nd quarter with 10 minutes to go so I relaxed and watched the game.

 

It was overtime now and when I saw the final snap, it flew and it bounced into the receivers hands. The Dallas Cowboys won and I was somewhat impressed. I got up and decided to make myself my Chicken Tenders. While I was putting them in the microwave, I heard something drop from upstairs. I first put my food in the microwave and ran upstairs to see what dropped. It was a glass cup that I kept and I had to sweep it up and dump it in my trash. My microwave sounded and I went down to get my food. When I went down, I saw a piece of paper saying "HELP ME!" I nodded my head as if to say to myself, "He's back for more!" I crumpled the paper and threw it in the trash quickly. 

 

I ate my food and decided to go upstairs and play some Halo 5. I heard a knock at my door. I saw a pizza guy and I went down to him and he asked, "Is this the correct address?" Except the pizza guy was Slender Man! I quickly told him it was the wrong address, slammed the door, and ran back upstairs. I quickly ran to my room and locked the door. No matter where I was, Slender Man would always follow me. I continued playing Halo 5 to forget about what just happened.

 

It was 6 PM now and I decided to order some pizza from Papa Johns. I ordered a large 3-cheese and it came within 30 minutes. I looked at the pizza guy and I saw Slender Man again. I quickly pieced myself back together and gave the man a tip. I took the pizza, thanked him and shut the door.  I took a deep breath and laid the pizza on the table. I ate 4 slices and put the rest in the fridge. It was already 11:30 PM so I decided to call it a day. I went upstairs, brushed my teeth and hopped on my bed and went to sleep.  I tossed and turned a bit and I finally got some sleep in.

 

I woke up at 5 AM to a creaking sound and I saw that my window was open. I never opened my window. I got out of bed to shut it, but at the last second, a piece of paper flew in. I picked up the paper and it said "Always watching; no eyes!" I crumpled the paper and threw it in the trash and I reached over to turn on my light. The light illuminated the room - and there was Slender Man, standing near my desk, tentacles reaching out hungrily. I ran out, but Slender Man kept teleporting, closer and closer. I eventually had nowhere to go and there I was, exhausted, standing face to face with the faceless figure.

 

Part 4 Coming soon

[kaisdf 3,320]

Article approved.

 

Another spooky piece; I like it. You are also learning from my previous comments, which is nice - spelling and grammar was much better in this piece. 

 

You do seem to focus on one sentence type, "I did this. I did that. I went here". It gets a bit repetitive after a while, but I'm not really sure what alternative you could go for in this writing style.

 

Edits:

• A few words changed to improve flow

[TankiNoob2000 231]

Thanks;)

[PHSa 9]

:ph34r:

[g-force 1,000]

it's really nice, but IMO I feel like your scenes could transit a bit more slowly. Before I can imagine a scene taking place, the scene quickly changes. Try lengthening your scenes.

 

Otherwise, it's a great work! Keep it up! Cheers! :D

 

Slender Man

[TankiNoob2000 231]

Thanks;)

[Person_Random 4,991]

Excellent work! Hmm... need to show you a cool little piece sooner or later.  Time to write!

[Lose 881]

you ended on a cliffhanger i severely dislike you now

 

 

 

jk i love it and i love cliffhangers too. i also dont severely dislike you. keep up the good work!

 

 

[TankiNoob2000 231]

Thanks;)

[Person_Random 4,991]

you ended on a cliffhanger i severely dislike you now

 

 

 

jk i love it and i love cliffhangers too. i also dont severely dislike you. keep up the good work!

 

 

I enjoy stories like this, but do try to stray from cliffhangers to promote creativity.