contest Tanki Horoscopes II

[Bydo 20,135]

Judges please judge this either with others or on its  own.. I'm good with what you choose. to me it's not right with others in a group seeing some have only done 1 horoscope.

this is done in fun and not insulting to  towards anyone . not to be take any of it seriously.. jokes only

sorry I wanted to get the moon cusp's down but ran out of time.. will try to think of some if I can . but not sure..

 

Horoscopes 2020

Capricorn December 22 – January 19

Fortune:

Magic is only around the corner. Find the magic rabbit and pull out the golden key from his hat. It will unlock the hidden room. But you need to find the room before you can unlock it.. Only a true magician will be the one to show you the way.

Relationships:

Time to let it go.. The baggage from the past is hindering your game play. Its now effecting to turn your metal to rust. Your tank is not going to be worth it in the end when cashing it in.

Money:

Showing your cards to soon in the battles will tend to take you on the loosing tracks. Learn to hold them and not to show them till you are ready to do so. You will gain in the long run.

Career:

Too much studying will get you the Cm's job. Leaving the CM looking to catch a ride on Ares to fly him to the moon.

Health:

Battery’s will be running low. Make sure you have them locked up in your garage and don’t give them your passwords. They like to run and play on the hills, going up and rolling down the hills.

 

Aquarius January 20 – February 18

Fortune:

Slow and steady will win. Rescue the Princess. Just be careful of the evil Event Helpers frogs, they have a bad habit of pushing you into the swamp. If you win, Huge rewards will be yours,  in the hand of crystals.

Relationships:

Relish your new summer friends and old ones will need to Ketchup to your rank.

Money:

Your walking a tight line on wasting your time on buying useless paints that the Dev’s forgot to remove. Only legends have a bad habit to fall into there traps.

Career:

Time to go back to the beginning to educate yourself on the patch notes. Seeing the Dev’s can only give us patch notes. Due to they have no knowledge on how to sew.

Health:

Stay away from the sandbox this summer. It’s a home to nano bots which have not been fed for some time now. The Management have cut back on investing into the company, due to CV19 and can’t afford to feed them. They like to hide in the sand and jump out when you lease expect it.

 

Pieces  February 19 – March 20

Fortune:

Invest in the re-enter battles & 404 stocks. It seems to be popping up in the game, they seem to be  bringing in 000 refunds to the creators.

Relationships

Your head is in the clouds and your true friends will bring you back down to Earth. Parkour will be taking more time learning then you wanted to . But in the end it will be a great flip flopping good time.

Money:

Money will be falling from the sky’s in Oct. Make sure you catch plenty enough golden pumpkins to make a 3.14.

Saving your Tankions will gain in the end. You could never have enough when Christmas time will be sliding in on your frosty tracks.

Career:

Reading the news archives might advance you to the next rank. Wail sitting on the beach hording your toilet paper.

Health:

Return to battles.. Will cost you in the end. When trying to claim a gold box.

 

Aries  March 21 – April 19

Fortune:

It will come to in the form of a gold rain. Racing will test your temperature on how cool you can be in a race. the more dust you make it will leave the others behind.

Relationships:

Try sticking to the IN LOVE PAINT and try using Twins. In time you will find your true Love in a battle.

Money:

Try acting as a Noob and then surprise players as you show them, how a master Noob takes the gold.

Career:

Now is not the time to cut corners it will end up costing you in the end. If your goal is be the next Mod – staff.

Health:

Buying Health box’s when no sale’s events are happening. Will end up being very costly in the end and you will fail to buy your dream garage items.

 

Taurus  April 20- May 20

Fortune:

Time to break open your coin box. To see all the rewards you can purchase from saving your crystals.

Relationships:

Time to join a clan, your one and only true love will be there in the form of a tank.

Money:

You need to stay away from the shop sales. They have been known to be over the top prices for cookies.

Career:

Time to go to the Wiki and find the mistakes in the Math. Mods tend to make huge mistakes seeing they have been out of school for so long.

Health:

Dev’s made the mistake of forgetting to make a protection Mask for our tanks. This is the time to make your own, so your protected from all those virus within the game.

 

Gemini May 21 – June 20

Fortune:

The Clown with in you will make you miss a special Investment when the Christmas Events take place.

Relationships:

Bad habits are hard to break when it comes to friends  Birthdays. It seems every year you tend to miss certain ones. This year buy a calendar so you can write  them down.

Money:

This is the year to spend on your dream trip to Moon Silence, to visit an old Alien friend. They have been longing for someone to stop in so they could do some Parkour experiments with.

Career:

Your work load will ease off around Christmas time. This is the best time to plan your trip seeing the Dev’s will be off playing with the left over Toilet paper. They will be trying to making crafts from them. But watch out for the CM. He has other plans to use the Toilet paper for. Like to use it to wallpaper his Office with it.

Health:

Buying fish sticks and cheese balls and eating them on the beach. Will make others jealous  as they can’t eat them cause there parents wont let them have there credit cards to buy.

 

Cancer June 21 – July 22

Fortune:

It’s the time to let the Genie out of the bottle. Acknowledge that your a buyer. Over time your friends will admit there also buyers.

Relationships:

As you battle more in Match Making you will find yourself flipping  head over tracks in Love with Juggernaut.

Money:

Time to cut back on buying Twinkies and snacks. It’s starting to show more these day’s with the weight gain on your mammoth.

Career:

This is the time to start a new account. Seeing over time your getting board of being a legend and not moving up in the ranks. The grammar King with in is getting restless.The Grammar King needs to go back and play in the jungle of noobs.

Health:

It’s time to put your Tank on a diet. You need to spend more time running around outside and taking photo’s of items in the real world for Tanki photo contest’s.

 

 

Leo  July 23 – August 22

Fortune:

You will fall into a mine field. Use caution where you roll. If you survive you will win the prize at the end.

Relationships:

It’s time to enjoy those battles you have been longing for. Christmas will be a busy time with Tanki. So take advantageous now to spend time with everyone seeing there is no school.

Money:

Your account will be plentiful. But near the month of November you will start to see it deflate and you will need to find ways to make money such as entering in contests.

Career:

Your Boss/ Teachers will see a great improvement in your work skills. But the down fall is it has nothing to do with your real life. It will be you dreaming and thinking of Tanki all day long and it will show in your write as you use comments from Tanki in your work.

Health:

It’s time to grease those tracks. The squeak in your tracks is bother players in battles.

 

Virgo  August 23 – September 22

Fortune:

This is the year for gold box rain along with crystals in battles. You could not ask for a better year. So much will be happening.

Relationships:

You will be more Independent and battle more on your own. You}re  true friends will understand. The past has been in turmoil and you just need time to reflect on your mistakes from battles. This is the year to find a new set ups that will work for you in the long run.

Money:

Over the year the summer months will prove to be, the all time best time of your career. The summer events will make your tank blossom into a respected player within the game. You will have more stalker’s then you realize. Its all for the good.

Career:

You will find yourself day dreaming about being in a battle in an e-sport battle. Just as your ready to cap the flag. Your woken up by your neighbors cutting the grass. You then realize it’s time to take a break from Tanki.

Health:

This is the year your health box’s will be running low due . Do to the virus it  has cause everyone to stock up on health supply’s. Buy now or when you can so you don’t run out when the Halloween ghost appears.

 

Libra  September 23 – October  22

Fortune:

Will be found in the Help sections. It will help you learn to get a track up over the other players. The more you learn about how to implement items the more you will make in crystals.

Relationships:

This is the year to join a clan. At first you will not feel like it. But when you do it will take time to find the one for you. Once you do it will be the best thing you will do for yourself and make a bunch of new friends.

Money:

You will be approached by the Admins to buy stocks in Tanki X. But it will be a scam. Think before you leap. Time to report any strange going on within Tanki.

Career:

Tanki Clowns are in full clowning around mood. The Cm’s have a bad habit of playing games on April 1^st. Use  caution in the dust from your tracks and don’t fall off the edge in the maps.

Health:

Using drones will only get you hurt and use up all the health box’s you have  build up over the years. Make sure you buy more hand sanitizer to keep your tank from getting the CV19.

 

Scorpio  October 23 – November 21

Fortune:

Fortune's will come to you in this year. Without having to work hard for it. Only thing you need to do us use drones to increase your prize in the end of the battles.

Relationships:

Instead of staying inside playing Tanki and having you parents complain. Meet up with friends to battle with you in games on there cell phones. This way when Juggernaut shoots you, they too will be blown away when you are thrown to the top of the Rio tower.

Money:

You will have crystals falling from the sky in blue box’s. Make sure you don’t forget to bring a plastic bag to carry them home to your garage with.

Career:

Education is well put to use with the old archives. Learning more about how the game and who the old time players like Maf or was that Maffaso? It will give you a track up.

Health:

Shield yourself form Ricochet ,they like to toss balls at players. They have a bad aim, so watch out for those low grounders.

 

Sagittarius November 22 – December 21

Fortune:

The rainbow you need to find will be found on the Rio beach. Be careful not to burn your tracks in the sands. They could melt and then you will be stuck in a battle with no way out.

Relationships:

You like to play games on your friends this year. Best place to search for you will be in the forest map hiding in your tree house, that you build over the summer.

Money:

There will be no limit where your creativity is concern. It will be flowing steadily in the form of postcards .You need to make at Christmas Events to  help bring in the money. But be warned there could be others who will steal your pencils. Like the alien ghost of past players. They claim there  still haunting  the maps in the game. They tend to come out closer to Oct 31. so be warn..

Career:

This is the year to bring the gold box’s to you. It’s time to educate yourself with the gold box drop zones and remember the Halloween maps don’t have zones so best advise will be to watch v-logs or other players blogs. Just be careful not to get demonetized by sharing the v-log.

Health:

Regular maintenance on your tanks. During the winter it you will need to make sure you did not miss a thing. Don’t forget to swap out the summer tracks for the winter ones. So your not sliding on thin Ice.

 

 

Edited August 19, 2020 by Bydo

[chinufire 19]

My birthday is on april 1st so heres my tanki horoscope. 

 

Pisces: A Pisces player is full of emotions and they are easily infuriated by their teammates during the struggles of a defensive battle. When the moons align around their planet Neptune, they channel internal spirits which unveils their full water element potential. Poseidon carved freeze from his cryptic trident which enchants a Pisces player with mystical freeze augments to liquidate their enemies. Fire renders them vulnerable but the immunity they obtain in the near future enables them to dominate wasp fire battles.

[Venem 615]

Spoiler

 

Gemini: There is a sense in which your current planetary positions are electrifying... (nothing to do with Tesla, just that you'll be zapped by lurking Gausses) Having Owl module equipped might help, or not, coz you might end up triggering the Gauss army. Never befriend a Gauss user, coz (s)he most prolly has Hornet, which is bad for your health.

 

Scorpio: Saving up Tankoins might benefit your dwindling finances. Don't play on small maps for the next few days, otherwise you risk getting excessively mined. Forget about Ultra skins, as I sense that the current position of Venus will bring you bad luck.

 

Leo: You have been spawn-killed too many times. Playing private battles will help you regain your confidence. Never rely on spawn-protection in MM. Oh, and don't forget that a long lost friend might contact you via Lobby chat. Be ready for a Gold-rain from that friend.

 

Pisces: Don't go Gold-digging in Pro battles. You'll find that noobs will vote you for that. Mars is in the perfect position for you- go claim your throne in MM battles! The God of War is always behind you.

 

Libra: Oh my! It's best that you stay away from Titans and Vikings and Hornets and Wasps and Dictators and Hunters and Mammoths. Use Ares for the next few days. Never use your Ares OD on Juggernaut, as you might incur the Juggernaut's wrath.

 

Aries: Spend all your crystals on micro-upgrades, as I sense a horde of crystals coming your way. Tankoins must be saved at all costs. Alas, your stars are not aligned in your favor. You might expect missing many events.

 

Sagittarius: Ah, for the low-rankers, I sense many Thunder-Mammoths ruining battles titled "XP/BP Only". You must rank-up quickly and buy Mk7 equipment. The high-rankers are lucky- you'll get plenty of Golds in Pro battles, and find some really great friends.

 

Capricorn: A perfect time for improving Parkour skills. You'll find helpful Parkourists on Discord. Beware, though. They may get a sudden change of heart, and use you to improve their KD ratio. You must focus on OMP.

 

Disclaimer: The above horoscopes are purely for fun, and I have no intention to offend anyone.

This is my entry for the contest.

I did only 8, cuz I ran out of ideas lol.

P.S. @Sacrifice do let me know your zodiac sign, as there is still time... I can edit my post and add your sign XD. I can't afford to lose your vote of confidence, as a lot of crystals are at stake... Astrologers need money, you know! ;]

Edited August 19, 2020 by SHREYA88

[Sacrifice 2,278]

@SHREYA88  since you didnt do my sign, you dont get my vote of confidence. 

*cri*

 

Edited August 19, 2020 by Sacrifice
Its a joke tho, dw.

[E_polypterus 2,374]

Cancer: Beware of the next tanker you meet equipped with the "In love" paint. Do not fight him for if you do you'd suffer a lot in your future relationships. 

Sagittarius: Beware of the next three tankers equipped with the "Hand sanitizer" paint. They're clean only in the outside. Keep a constant one meter gap with them or else you're not likely to go anywhere you please for the next few months cuz  of quarantine.

Leo: Beware of the next seven tankers you meet equipped with the “Savanah” paint. If you meet any and do not leave the battle immediately, the next safari you go on will be a very unhappy one where it will lead to you being chased by seven very unhappy, angry, and naked Aborigines.

Capricorn: Beware of the next nine tankers you see equipped with the “Helper” paint. If you end up in the winning side with one of them on the losing side...you’d be wishing you were the one on the losing side(There’s a possibility of a number of bans coming your way)

Libra: The thing you had been dreading for a long time will come to pass... when you meet a tank with the “LOL” paint. Do not laugh at this statement for if you do, you will receive a six month ban by the moderator ________ (name will not be revealed as mentioning an individual and his/her duties without the persons’ permission is a punishable offense {Even for Soothsayers, yes} ).

Edited August 19, 2020 by E_polypterus

[Volturo 181]

Spoiler

Aries

While you prefer charging right into battle and confronting your enemies head-on, you should consider a change in tactics. Try out a long range turret and pick them off one by one from a distance. You never know, you may be surprised by the outcome. Prepare for some choice words from your enemies as they get blasted to pieces without even getting a glimpse of your tank.

 

Taurus

Now is the time to act! Carpe diem, as our Latin-speaking friends would say. Try your hand at completing the Battle for Olympus special missions. I have a feeling you’ll get something *special* in your ultra containers. (Disclaimer: I am not responsible for any damages caused by my fortunes. Don’t blame me if you end up with 2x 125 mines. )

 

Gemini

Romance is in the air! Your future in Tanki Online involves a special someone . You will meet them very soon in battle. Make sure you have your most good-looking combo equipped. Don’t be afraid to break out any rare paints you have (take a break from green paint, alright?) to make a good impression. I only hope that your Tanki soulmate is really who they say they are...

 

Cancer

This week will be a good one for you in terms of Tanki contests. Try your luck with one of the chat contests, or if you’re feeling more ambitious and want a bigger prize, keep your eyes peeled for any new contests on the forum. *wink wink* *nudge nudge*

 

Leo

Unfortunately, this won’t be a good week for you matchmaking-wise. Perhaps it would be wiser for you to just take a break from it for a while. Chill in parkour battles with your friends or, if you want to earn some experience and crystals, give pro battles a shot. After your much-needed break, you will feel refreshed and ready to blast some tanks in matchmaking again.

 

Virgo

Well well well… isn’t someone’s birthday coming up soon? While you might not be able to celebrate in-person with your friends, don’t be too upset. Why? Well, because some of your friends on Tanki are planning a special celebration for you. Enjoy, have fun, and don’t let them forget to give you birthday punches!

 

Libra

Congratulations!!! It looks like the kit you’ve been desperately waiting for will finally arrive in your shop this week! The Tanki gods have looked favorably upon you and have decided to reward you for your good behavior. Make sure you keep it up! We wouldn’t want something bad to happen to your crystal balance...

 

Scorpio

Try Ares, they said. It’ll be fun, they said... Okay, so Ares didn’t exactly meet your expectations. Maybe you shouldn’t have spent all of your crystals on it. Don’t worry though, since there’s still time to earn them back. This week, you will have good fortune in matchmaking battles, and with the summer fund boost, you will earn a decent amount.

 

Sagittarius 

Ask not what your fellow tankers can do for you — ask what you can do for your fellow tankers. Instead of begging for golds with the all too familiar “admin gold pls” you should consider doing something nice for others in the game. Put a dent in that secret gold stash (that’s right, I know all about it) and host a party. You may earn some new friendships, which we all know are more valuable than any amount of crystals .

 

Capricorn

You’re a feisty tanker, aren’t you? You’ve been in one too many confrontations, let’s call them, with your fellow tankers. This week, you should definitely try to cool your engines. If you don’t, you may be ambushed with a ban when you least expect it. And we wouldn’t want that to happen, would we?

 

Aquarius

This week, you will have great fortune with your daily missions. They will be easier to complete than usual and give better rewards. Besides, it has been wayyy too long since the last time you received gold boxes from daily missions, hasn’t it? Oh shoot, I’ve said too much. 

 

Pisces

You are about to face some drastic changes in your Tanki career. Could they be changes to your friends list or clan status? Or maybe you’ll purchase some new equipment or get something long-awaited from a container? Only time will tell...

yee yee

[Bydo 20,135]

24 minutes ago, At_Shin said:

 

 

I was also  thinking of changing the titles to something other then the normal horoscopes but could not think of good names.. good job.

 

good luck everyone ..

[Person_Random 4,991]

Alright guys, I wasn't here yesterday, so y'all had an extra day. It's time for me to judge the results. Winners will be announced in about 1-2 weeks. Thanks for your cooperation!

Topic Locked.