Life

[C.O.N.Q.U.E.R.O.R 3,845]

“Ari… you ever wonder what life is really about?”

 

~~~

 

Leff and I were sitting with our backs to an evergreen atop a small hill that overlooked a road near our house. This was our spot; we came here whenever we wanted to relax. Oftentimes, if one of us left the house and went to the tree, the other would follow after shortly. Just ‘cause we wanted to be with one another, I guess. Siblings. Isn’t that what they do? That’s how we grew up, at least. With our parents constantly fighting and Mom basically being a bomb just waiting to explode at the slightest touch, Leff and I had to stick together. I always wondered how it was fair that Dad ended up with someone as volatile and irrational as Mom; while Mom tore apart the family, Dad was the strand that held us all together. Leff and I relied on him completely.

We went out together on that day because we loved the outdoors. Also because we hated being in that house… but mostly because we loved the outdoors. It was a beautiful spring day, and the weather was perfect. Or, well, almost perfect. It was a little bit chilly in the shade of the tree. We exchanged a few words, but after a while, we both fell silent. The birds were finally starting to return after winter, but the sound of traffic interrupted nature’s perfect melody.

Abruptly, my younger brother turned to me with a distant look in his eyes and asked in a quiet voice, “Ari... you ever wonder what life is really about?”

I caught myself gazing off into the sky and stopped to respond to Leff. “What?”

Leff scrambled to explain himself. “Well, uh, lately I’ve just been thinking. What’s the point of living if all that life gives you is a bunch of hurt? You know? It just seems like it never stops. Mom’s always getting drunk or high, Dad constantly has to worry about how to support us with a part-time job—and Mom blows through that money on her drugs in no time flat—and just last week, Forrest’s dad died of some incurable virus.”

I laughed softly.

Clearly still confused, Leff stared at me, his eyes asking an unspoken question.

“I asked Dad the same question a few years ago. He simply told me, ‘Life is what you make of it.’” I glanced back at Leff and saw that his face was completely blank. I smiled and ran my fingers through my hair. “Yeah, to be honest, that answer never satisfied me either… but I’ve found that it’s easier to just let that question fade into the background and to take life one day at a time. Maybe someday I’ll find the answer, but for now, each day comes with more than enough trouble to keep me busy. Just… try not to think about it so much.”

Leff sighed and looked away. “I guess…”

 

~~~

 

It was only a few weeks later that I felt my phone vibrate in my pocket while I was at a party. I ignored the first notification, but after four more within a few seconds, I pulled out my phone to check. Five texts—no, six—from Dad. 

Ari
Ari, please respond
Ari, this is urgent, I need you to come home
Something’s happened with your brother
Please
Come home

The conversations around me faded into the background as the life of the party left me, replaced by an overwhelming feeling of apprehension. I heard the host call out to me as I left, but a million thoughts were rushing through my mind. Multiple emergency vehicles passed me on my way home; I thought nothing of them until later. My panic mounted when I drew close to my house and saw the dreaded flashing lights of an ambulance. I slammed my car door and ran past the first responders into the house, shouting for my dad.

I felt tears already finding their way down my face even before I heard the news. The moment Dad saw me, he rushed over and enveloped me in a hug.

Choking on his words, he barely managed a whisper. “Leff killed himself.”

I’ll never forget the last thing I saw in my dad’s eyes before I collapsed.

Total and absolute defeat.

 

~~~

 

Leff, what’s life about? I guess you couldn’t bear not knowing. If only I had one more chance to talk to you, maybe I’d be able to tell you. I never realized how much you meant to me till you were gone. Fifteen years is a long time, but looking back, it feels so short. Somehow, despite being younger, you taught me so much more than I ever taught you… and this time, you’ve told me the answer to the exact question that you asked.

It’s love. All those years, I took you for granted. But Leff, I’ve learned. I’ll love my friends and family with everything that I have, because there’s a chance that tomorrow doesn’t come. I understand now… so could you end this horrible dream now? Could you come back?

Please.

Come home.

Edited March 30, 2020 by C.O.N.Q.U.E.R.O.R

[kaisdf 3,320]

Article Approved.

 

Very powerful article; absolutely amazing. Perfect accuracy, no edits made.

[3dL 454]

Best all the time .

[Lose 881]

Beautifully written.

[foxer_XXX 135]

On 4/4/2020 at 6:57 AM, kaisdf said:

Article Approved.

 

Very powerful article; absolutely amazing. Perfect accuracy, no edits made.

 

On 3/29/2020 at 9:42 AM, C.O.N.Q.U.E.R.O.R said:

Spoiler

Edited March 30 by C.O.N.Q.U.E.R.O.R

 

So, how do you explain this? :x

[C.O.N.Q.U.E.R.O.R 3,845]

23 hours ago, foxer_XXX said:

 

So, how do you explain this? :x

Lol I made a couple of stylistic/tone changes; as far as grammar goes, I had one mistake in tense that I fixed after a friend noticed it

 

I mistakenly used present tense instead of past tense

I noticed that I used "softly" only a few sentences afterward, so I changed the first usage