You're ever so welcome! This is exactly why I need to buy a laptop and get back to Tanki.

Oh boy! All you had to do was ask! How to Get a Girlfriend in Tanki

I need to get a computer so I can rejoin all these crazy parties.

Rekt boi.

I'll do it, eventually.

Hello tankers, and welcome to 'Blast From The Past Interviews'! Here we speak to older players and helpers who have long parted from the game, in an attempt to recall a few good memories, update ourselves on how they're doing, what they're doing, and simply to get to know them if you haven't yet before. Today we're speaking with @deadtoyou, an old time chat moderator and player. He'll be telling us how he remembers Tanki, what he's doing currently in life, and of course, if he's coming back or not. Read to find out more! Player Profile Game Name | deadtoyou (Maybe I'll change it one of these days so I stop getting those awful jokes ) Nicknames | dead, (duh ) deady, and D2Y are the most common (believe me, I've seen a lot of variations). Real Name | Joshua Age | 19 Gender | Male Country | United States of America Hey there, how're you today? You're a former helper of the EN community. Tell us a bit about how you came to find the game and eventually a spot as a helper? Are there any funny stories you'd like to share with us which you experienced while holding your position? @deadtoyou Oh my...where to start? Well, I started playing Tanki as a part of the Miniclip community, but I soon discovered that it was a standalone game with its own website, and I switched to that. I remember starting back when crystals came in boxes of one! Wow! After playing for a month or two, I discovered the forum, and a whole new community that I loved interacting with. Of course, all the great times on the forum came with all the bad stuff - you know, all the stuff we're glad the Moderators are there to get rid of. I became interested in the Forum Moderator position, and I kinda poked around a bit and made some inquiries, but nothing came of it. However, my time spent in the game also brought my attention to all the abuse of the chat system and the game itself (hacking, griefing, account stealing, etc.) and having an account of mine stolen for a brief period of time really opened my eyes too. I started getting interested in the Chat Moderator position, and I sent an application to the Administrators soon after that. I had spent a lot of time sitting in the main chat rooms helping people out with problems and questions of theirs, and I really enjoyed it. I know a lot of people I came into contact with think Moderators in general are no fun - and maybe somebody reading this now might think that way, but I can assure you, we are a fun-loving bunch! I remember one instance in particular... We all went to (what was at that time) the primary English server and started typing "Ostrica is awesome" in the chat. We were so cracked up over that! I also remember so many fun times attending rank-up parties, photoshoots, awesome events, and more! I will forever remember all the fun times. And if any of my old team members are reading this - Thank you! You guys are awesome, (I know you might not get this a lot) you guys do so much to help the Tanki Community, and I miss you all so much! I'm glad I got to know you guys. *virtual hug* Wow! You seem to have had a lot of fun back in the day, apart from moderating. But what I found interesting is that you mentioned photoshoots, which reminded me of something. I remember giving you and a bunch of old friends a photoshoot together. That was simply awesome! When you look back on those memories, how do you feel? How do you remember Tanki? Tell the newer players how Tanki felt back when you played it. @deadtoyou It felt...well, in a word, simple. That's all it is; simple. And don't get me wrong, all the updates to Tanki and the new Tanki X are awesome too, but I know there are a few of you nostalgic players out there that liked the simple Tanki just as well. I remember playing before daily missions, before gold boxes were all the rage, before supplies were "smart", before the huge rebalance, before Tanki became such a huge platform... But I also remember interacting with the community through all those updates, how we learned to use them, like them, dominate with them... I loved every minute of it. And looking back now, years later... I still feel that thrill I felt when I played, the satisfaction that came with a problem solved or question answered for someone, the rush of the gold box, the happiness that I felt when I talked and played with friends, the sadness that came when I said goodbye to longtime friends, and the joy of finding new ones. Beautifully put, couldn't have said it better myself. But before we get dragged into a vortex of olden day memories, let's discuss your real life for a bit. How has your life changed since you left Tanki? Where are you holding now, and what are you aiming for? @deadtoyou I'm holding double sixes, and I'm aiming for that pocket on your shirt, so you better hand over all dem' crystals partner! Ah, Louis L'Amour book references... Speaking of which, I am enjoying a couple of those books as we conduct this interview. Now, down to real life...the main reason I resigned my position is because I had applied to a local college and had plans to fill up most of my day with coursework. In addition to that, I work as a salesman at a hardware retailer. The cool thing is, I help people with problems and I answer questions just like I did in Tanki, so I'm right at home! I think my life has changed a lot, not just because I don't spend my time in Tanki that much anymore, but because change is a part of life as I get older, and I think acceptance of that change is an important thing to have. Nice outlook you've got there, and it is pretty cool that you went from answering people on Tanki to, well, doing the same in real life. Way to keep the momentum going! Was that coincidental, or did you purposefully try to find a job that was similar to the one you had in Tanki? @deadtoyou I think I have always gravitated towards occupations that put me in contact with people to help them. Tanki was the first "official" occupation that I was involved in that really got me going in that direction, and now I have a job where I do even more of it. God gave me a love for helping people out however I can, and I'm glad he's given me all these opportunities to show it. Well, you sure got talent. You weren't a helper in the community for so long, but I remember, you definitely helped many people out there. Nice job! Getting back to Tanki for a second, who are some of the best friends you made here? Are you still in touch with them, or did it all just die when you left? @deadtoyou Well, most of my contacts and connections did die out when I left, but there were a few besties that I kept in (more or less) constant with (@beaku and you top out that list ). The reason for this is because I kinda stopped using Skype altogether, switching most of my online conversations to email. Another one of those changes I mentioned before. I also don't use social media platforms at all, so it's harder for people to talk to me in that sense. Me? Close contact?! Ah- Pff- Ahher- Eh- Eek- I- Well, thanks! But the obvious question at the end of the day is, do you ever plan in rejoining Tanki? And if so, when? @deadtoyou It's hard to say... I can't see the future, but right now, my plans do not include "rejoining" Tanki.... Although I do play it sometimes, I don't have plans to come back full time like I was. I do know that if (somewhere in the future) I were to rejoin the community, it would be so much different from what I was used to back then that I might not enjoy it like I did. Aw, sorry to hear that. Well, was nice chatting. Thanks for taking part in this interview, and of course, have a good one! @deadtoyou You're welcome, fantastic talking with you too Yis! Maybe one of these days we'll play some XP, 1 vs. 1 and I can dominate you like old times. See you around! Yea, everyone knows I'm a noob, you don't gotta rub it in. Bye! *Hastily ends interview* Hope you enjoyed this casual interview. Give us your thoughts down below. Whether it be on something we mentioned in the interview, or simply a piece of advice to help us improve our interviews next time. Who would you like to see be interviewed next? Leave that thought down below!

Greetings, readers! Here at the Tanki Online Newspaper, we are passionate about providing you with information on all the latest updates, turrets, hulls, maps, contests or just about anything related to the community or game; and you can trust us to cover it all. After a well-deserved break, we're finally back with the latest real news. Administration Strikes Back - Loose Rabbit Is Finally Caged By @Flexoo The Dictator, GoldBrick's precious legacy, was a traditional journal column that kept the audience regularly informed about the latest and finest news happening in the community. Surprisingly, the column was cancelled at the zenith of its fame and the original founder took a turn to the ranks of admin oppressors that were driven by the blind fate of world domination. It was much to our delight when a certain redactor operating under a pseudonym Yisroel.Rabbit dusted off the beloved column. However, after a couple of successful editions, we came to know that Yistroell started to publish less accurate, borderline gossip, information to raise the view count such as the "Dorito in the Kungur Sky" segment (when in fact, the only thing you can see in Kungur is the grand cheese ball as it can be seen on picture evidence below), or the blatant lie he posted months back that the administration was on honeymoon while in fact we were collecting resources in Africa for the new Zimbabwean newspaper. Based on these trespasses among many other, it was decided to send the main editor to a Newspaper diversion program. Forcing him to go was by no means an easy task. The sleek rabbit skillfully used any office crevice that would be a tight fit even for the likes of Fen to delay the inevitable. At the end, we finally managed to hunt down this noxious animal and put it behind bars. One question remains unanswered, though. What will happen to The Dictator? @Vikingsrallentando and @Viking4s proposed an idea to transform The Dictator to a talk show with secondary title "The Vik and Viking talk show", the title that will once and for all determine who from the duo will use the acronym Viking in the Newspaper office. @tweezers instantly countered this proposal with his own idea of car magazine. Others suggested a brand new digital media that would cover the hottest real life topics like "The misadventures of the Paul brothers" or "Why Viners should have been blocked from YouTube in 2016". We haven't made a final decision. Stay tuned to find out in October. How Yisroel.Rabin really got Helper of the Month By Anonymous Tanker Last month, @Yisroel.Rabin got the Helper of the Month award. Everyone was astonished as to how he managed to obtain such an award with doing little to no work at all. In fact, Yisroel was always viewed as the least helping helper, never the most! I spoke with our Newspaper Administrator, @Flexoo about the issue. Here's what he had to say. "Yes. I'm trying to keep it all hushed up. Cedric just told me to do it. He sounded afraid when he told me. He said I should ask no questions and simply award him HOTM... I don't know why he gave me such a command, although I'd like to suspect it was Yisroel's doing. Cedric told me not to mess with him, and treat him like I always have. I can't fire him, but he suddenly feels like a threat to the whole of Tanki. I don't know what he's up to, but it can't be good. Sorry, that's all I know." Very strange, very strange indeed. I've began investigating Yisroel's whereabouts since my conversation with Flexoo. He's been acting strange lately. Sometimes he's suddenly disappear from Skype and go away for a few hours. One night I followed him. He went to Factory. The next night I set up cameras and lo behind in case he shows up again. I watched for three hours, he didn't budge. He made odd sounds. Un-earthly sounds which I've never heard before. He seemed to be waiting. Suddenly, my camera went crazy and shut down. He turned around and shot towards me. I dodged and ran away as fast as I could. When I thought I was at a safe distance I turned around to look back. A gigantic U.F.O. hovered over Yisroel's area. Everything went bright for a second, and when the brightness faded, Yisroel was gone, along with the space craft. I don't know what Yisroel's up to, but it isn't safe. I have gone into hiding, I'm no longer safe. Godmode_ON's comment found in the forum; could the beast be coming back? By @Hexed In other news, we have made an discovery so exciting, it could change the shape of the entire community. We'll hand over the mic to our correspondent in Game Discussion, @Hexed. Hi Hexed! Please tell us more about the eye-opening discovery you just made minutes ago? How do you feel? Hello John, I feel quite amazing to be honest - discovering things like this only happens once in a life time. You viewers must now be jumping on your couches, desperate to see what the discovery actually is. Well, open the spoiler and on you go! Reporters suffer from amnesia after Magnum shell hits offices By @Yisroel.Rabin Many of our reporters have suffered a severe amnesia - the phenomenon where a person suddenly forgets something... So basically me on every test I've ever taken. This dramatic disturbance in the balance occurred when a Magnum shell hit the EN Reporters' HQ with full force. Experts who have looked at the blast site said it must've been from an M4 Magnum on 99% power, and aim at around 35°. So, if we calculate that (which I didn't), you can guess that the attacker was about 20 meters away, as shown in this homemade diagram. The funny thing is, guess who lives 20 meters away from the EN Reporters' HQ? Yes, forum moderator and thinks-he's-cooler-than everyone, @Maf! After a long interrogation on Maf, we got him to open up. We're currently looking into rebuilding the EN Reporters' HQ into something a lot cooler, getting medical help for our newspaper reporters who've been affected by this attack, and looking into Maf's mental state. We're sure to get back to you in the next issue on how this story progresses. The Real Truth Behind The Summer Break - Revenge of the Sith By @stanzhang You may have read this announcement when Issue 66 published: Newspaper Issues Take a Break This August. You may wonder why? However, after reading the Newspaper, why does it stop after Issue 66? Coincidence? I don't think so. Exactly, it looks strangely like the Order 66 in Star Wars Episode III. On the instant when the Emperor Flexoo executed the Issue 66, all reporters were exterminated by the Clones also known as Flexbots. Every member of the reporter team is dead, I along with two Vikings are the only survivors. The Vikings are currently hiding in a mysterious jungle named Dagobah and gave no news since. All of this was an evil plan prepared months in advance by The Emperor Flexoo and his apprentice Dark Beaku. You now know why Beaku turned to the dark side and went to TX with a role of administrator to rule the new Forum. They created Flexbots that controlled dead reporters accounts to write at their place, in order to hide their plans from the readers. Those bots weren't ready to deploy in August, that's why they extended the next Newspaper release over to September. I can sense that the Force is strong with you, find those Master Vikings on Dagobah, they will teach you how to master The Force, find them and you will learn the secrets of journalism. Few of you guys may complete the training and become Master Reporters. If not, join the rebellion and fight on our side! Help us, readers; you are our only hope. Please read this before it gets caught and deleted by the Emperor Flexoo! Beaku turned to the dark side We can clearly see the resemblance between them Hexed found hexed By @Yisroel.Rabin *Listen to this while reading* We take this moment and opportunity to remember the warm memories we all share of Hexed. He was tragically found hexed yesterday in the factory, where his last battle was said to be fought, his tank covered in oil spills and graphic images alike. Tanki noobaligists suggest he was hexed about three hours before he was found. Legend never die, they self-destruct. Hexed was a heroic and noble simpleton; never held a grudge against anyone. He was cheerful guy, always made us laugh, never made us cry. His soul travels up to the heavenly skyboxes, where he shall dwell for eternity. His loss will greatly affect us all on many levels. Today we stand in unison as to commemorate the memory of Hexed. He was horrifically taken from our presence by an evil wizard by the name of GoldRo— Uh, I mean The-Rock-Who-Shall-Not-Be-Named. We stand strong with the loss of a friend, because with every loss we become stronger, higher, and ever-more vigilant. We, the newspaper team, has put together a special memorial in honor of Hexed. We present to you, fellow readers and even people scrolling through this without even reading it just to write "nice" and hold the place of 'first comment', the almighty Hexed Memorial! Leaks show where your crystals really go after you spend them By @Yisroel.Rabin Have you ever wondered what the deal is with crystals? By that I mean, have you ever wondered where all those heaps of crystals go after you buy a garage item or change a mission? Well, new leaks from TofuLeaks show that the developers have "ever-so-randomly" earned a whopping four millions crystals in the past week. Rumors have spread that every crystal is not a mere virtual currency, but actually goes straight to the developers after they're used. Later leaked video footage shows Hazel partying at AlternativaPlatform, wearing gold chains and all the latest Jake Paul merchandise. Although Hazel denies ever even being slightly interested in Jake Paul, the video shows Hazel's true colors at last. Dr. Noymes Vorik, a former worker for Tanki Online, was recording admitting that the currency is scam created only for the benefit of the workers at TO, and was later recorded saying he, during his time at TO, used his money on stylish haircuts. Other parties benefiting from the currency are the Administrators. As we all know, reporters get paid in teddy bears and chocolate milk shakes, however, the reporters' Administrators, as well as Administrators of other groups, get paid in a share in the benefit of this scam of a currency called crystals. Reporter Administrator @Flexoo's tax returns are substantial evidence of this. Papers show that Flexoo has spent over 20 million dollars in new paintjobs and arm replacements, and has bought an estimated four thousand cans of WD-40. More info can be found here. *insert link to something* Cedric resigns to become a full time CNN reporter By @Yisroel.Rabin Nuff' said. If you want to read more from The Dictator, here are the news reports from previous months! - July 2014 - August 2014 - September 2014 - October 2014 - November 2014 - January 2015 - February 2015 - March 2015 - August 2015 - December 2015 - January 2016 - February 2017 - March 2017 - April 2017 - May 2017 - June 2017 - July 2017

Sentimental? Well, I can be at times, but I just like photography, I got cool pics of / with my friends too, but I doubt they'd let me share those. This is one of the 50-ish pics I took, every picture completely different. It goes from a video of me jumping off a boat going 80 km/h to a beautiful pic of a sunset.

Went to cottage with my classmates this past weekend. We had hardcore chill moments, went fishing, jet skiing, blasted music until 4 AM, but nothing beats the view of the lake.

I know, right? :lol:

I'm assuming you're assuming I'm an adult? I'm not, nor do I act like one. I love doing crazy stuff in school like all teens my age. ^_^

I feel so bad for you. You're so addicted that you even have to play in these rough situations. ... Just do something else! I find so much fun garbage on the internet besides Tanki. :/

What? :think:

I saw a firework fall down and fly past me. My Canada Day is complete.

@Yisroel.Rabin :v

Slogan duh wha what? Who, what, where, and why are you talking about. I am just the coolest president ever and it shouldn't be so complicated.

I love everything I'm seeing. You guys really know how to turn the game into something beautiful. Keep it up!

I have many friends, but none are girls, or human. WIth that, I'll be closing the topic again; it's simply to famous. Besides, this section is for amateurs, not me (I'm pro). Topic covfefed.

No, I'm just under investigation at the moment. Yes! Speak your mind and keep supporting. I should be finished with this investigation business very soon!

No one really leaves.

What rain?

I was dying in 30°C, but 53!?!? Ah! Maybe don't use a car from 2001. :x

We received many fantastic entries from you guys, most of which made me laugh. But, as the rules of every contest go, not everyone can win. With that thought in mind, we have (or I have) whittled the winners down to the best of the best! See the winners below. Winners The following tankers receive 20 000 for their entries, as well as a spot in this month's The Dictator! @Lynus_the_Egg @CarryIsLive OPjoshua @CarryIsLive will also be receiving another 5 000 as a consolation prize for a smaller entry. Check out their entries here! Thanks to everyone who participated! Leave your feedback down below. Do you want another contest like this in the future? How did you like the winners entries? Tell us below. Have a great day!

Yea. I was a 6th grader back then, so I didn't really have to worry about anything besides what time my mother would realize I was up at 3 AM playing Tanki.