Pass 1. :D

Lovely story, you have quite the talent!

There is a special place in hell for those who take repair kits at 98% health.

w00t w00t Pass 1.

Try me. Stayed up too late for three days in a row, eating nothing but cheetos puffs and watching video games.

Shameless Advertisement Alright, besides my shameless ads, I have an idea. What if we put a secret message in the rules, to verify whether a new applicant has read through them or not? They would have to read the rules, and then they would have to put the secret message into their app. Good idea or no?

I really hate it when I reach my limit for upvotes. +1 I believe you would first have to wait until one retires or moves up. After that, DOS will test you to see if you fit the criteria - loyalty, friendliness, a certain degree of helpfulness, etc.

Said "HBD Canada" on every single social media site I went on but completely forgot this one. Ugh, feel free to kill me. HAPPY (really late) CANADA DAY!

The contest is long over, if that's what you're thinking. However, for future contests, you can send in your captions via a Google Docs link in the contest post.

Interesting story, though I must admit it's kind of disturbing how nobody seems bothered by the "puppet" getting murdered, especially since she is supposedly around the same age as Emily.

Alright then Glorious Draconic Leader, farewell until next time! P.S. Can I keep your throne warm for you? :P

Gratz on rankup! Couldn't make an account with that name :ph34r: But...HDxAbdomen is up...

Corrected. ;)

Chimaeras are a type of fish. Look it up.

Guys it's kind of hard to keep making alts based off of nicknames people call me: Abbadoom Flabbydoom Absofdoom Absofsteel Abbandoom Abbandon Abdomen

Ooooooooooh okay, that clears everything up. Glad to know you have a gissimo alt ;)

Shameless advertisements: HD-relevant stuff:

I mean no offense to anyone, but this is smack dab in the open. We have our enjin forums for a reason, and I'm relatively active over there, in case anyone applies.

Mhm. Around 700?

Let's not go back to Spamland.

Well good luck to everybody participating, you can't let Lasershark win everything, now can you? :P

Finally. ^_^ Pass 1.

9/10 The irony is that your name is also kind of generic, though you're possibly the first person I've seen who has multiple words in their name and has PROPER CAPITALIZATION FOR EACH ONE.

Heads Will Roll Sometimes, bad things happen to the nicest people. Such is the case of a certain Edward Falks, a nice, middle-aged man who used to give sweets out to the neighborhood kids if they asked politely enough. He always had a joke to tell, a practical joke to pull off, or some money to donate to a good cause. He sometimes babysat kids when their parents weren't around, and they always loved visiting him. His rules were always not quite as strict as their parents' rules, and there was always a new, exciting place to visit in his house. He liked everyone, and everyone liked him, so it was a rather big surprise when someone found his body-less head in his backyard, surrounded by what parents would tell their children was "ketchup". Edward's death sparked a massive investigation by the local police, although neither the killer nor the rest of poor Edward's body were ever found since that day. There were, of course, several suspects, but none of them were proven guilty. Devere Wellington was a short, thick man (thick in more than just one way) of about 30 or so, and was a notorious brawler. He always carried his beloved authentic 1942 switchblade with him, and, legend has it, when a man dared steal it from him, Devere punched him straight across the border to the next country, though the legend didn't specify which country. The police made a beeline for Devere once Edward's head was found, since Devere had come close to killing people multiple times. However, there was no evidence whatsoever to convict him, and several people had supported Devere's alibi anyways, so he was, indeed, a free man. Wanda Bluffings was the local landlord, a jolly woman, though she could be quite strict if the time called for it. She had no criminal record whatsoever, although she was notorious for housing several criminals on her property in the past, even if always without her knowledge. The police went to her next, since Edward owed her debt. Again, no evidence was found, and her alibi was supported by a few people, so she walked, and still walks, free. Hugo Tell, a rather tall, skinny man, was third on the suspect list, mainly because of one incident in which he was involved. A while back, a police officer was found dead after a trial involving Hugo. The officer in question had several cuts and gashes to the neck, and was found in an alleyway nearby. However, it was found that Hugo was nowhere near the officer at the time, since another officer had locked him in a waiting cell a few minutes before, and neither the door nor the window showed any signs of being forced. However, he was still held under suspicion by many, even if the majority of said suspicious people also believed in black magic. In any case, Hugo was not found guilty of Edward's death, and got out free, though recently he died in a car crash. Finally, when the police got desperate enough, they interrogated Abby Falks, Edward's wife and, now, widow. She didn't last very long in the interrogation room, since an angry crowd of people demanded she be released - mainly because she was just as sweet and well-known in the neighborhood as her late husband, and everyone knew that she was only being questioned because of Edward's will, which entitled Abby to a rather large sum of money. However, a recent incident has changed people's minds. Before, many had thought that Devere was the culprit, and before he moved out of town, there were several attempted lynchings targeted at Devere. They stopped trying to lynch him after he got his head chopped off, and not too cleanly at that. That was a few weeks before, so it is still relatively recent. Detective Clancy Woodborough, a nice man, father of three lovely kids, was assigned to the case, and is still working on it, even at this moment. I was invited here by a certain person who went by the name of "Alan". He claimed to have information on the Devere case, and apparently, he also has information on the Edward case that happened years ago. Personally, I think he's the culprit, which is why I agreed on a place far from my family and kids, and I brought a few officers with me who agreed with my hunch. They're stationed in a few buildings beside the alleyway I agreed to meet "Alan" in. Speaking of "Alan", he should be here by now, actually. My watch says he's about five minutes late. I would normally stay here, but something just does not seem quite as right as I would like it to be. It's awful quiet, and the place seems just a little too dark for me to be able to see, yet a little too bright for me to hide. Time goes by fast, ten minutes since "Alan" was supposed to meet me. Since he isn't here, it would probably be a nice idea to radio a few of the officers around the area, to see if they have noticed anything out of the blue. Just another voice would probably cheer me up in this dreadful alleyway. "Sergeant Nicholson, you see anything out of the ordinary?" Silence. "I repeat, sergeant Nicholson, is there anything worth noting?" Silence. This is odd. Either Nicholson is out for a bathroom break - Or he's out for good. I radio the other officers. One by one, I receive nothing but eerie silence. Time to leave, this might get dangerous. Thump. Already out of time. I look around, but buildings surround me on three sides, and the sound is coming from the remaining side. I could cut through a building, but that might be too risky. Thump. No time, I can already see a shadow of someone coming, time to cut through the building. Perhaps if I take the stairs quietly up to the fourth floor, I can escape. Whoever is pursuing me should assume I got out the other side, and I'll be safe. Presumably, anyways. Thump. How are my wife and kids going to react to my death, if it happens? I should have listened, this was indeed a terrible idea. Thump. I'm on the fourth floor, and I don't think I'm being pursued anymore. My plan worked. It seems like this was the building Sergeant Nicholson was stationed in, so I may as well check on him. Thump. Oh. I better make it quick. Thump. I'm inside the room the Sarge was supposed to be in, but nobody is inside. I don't see any signs of struggle, and there's no blood, so maybe Nicholson really is out for a bathroom break. But then, what's that thumping noise, and why didn't anyone else respond? Thump. I take out my gun and point it at the door. If someone other than the Sarge comes in, I won't hesitate to shoot. Or rather threaten to shoot. I'm out of ammo. Thump. They should be at the doorway in three... Thump. Two... Thump. I tighten my hold on the gun. I don't care if it's out of ammo, it's my only hope. One... Thump. Sergeant Nicholson's head pops into view. He seems a little surprised to see me here, probably because I wasn't supposed to be checking in on him. "Oh thank goodness Sarge, you weren't answering the radio, so I decided to check on you, and -" Hugo Tell walks into the room. The Sarge's surprised head in one hand, a machete in the other, and two massive fangs in his smiling mouth. Bloody hell.

I keep getting hit by #5. Lieutenants+ see my rank, look at my garage, then immediately start chucking "N00B BUYER GET OUTTTT LOL U SUKKKK" at me. Of course, ignoring them is the best choice, but it's not really all that easy to do when they're targeting you only.