Too close, yet too hopelessly far.

When you hardly use your supplies, and you score almost 3 times as much as the second place player on your team. We were up 50 points, during that time, I had 400 score, second place score on my team: in the 60s. I scored even more than anyone on the other team, and they drugged madly. It actually felt like a 1 on 5 in our base, me trying to stop some mad tankers, my team hardly did anything.

BANK TELLER Big House Behind Red Flag in Kungur Can you handle stress like no other? Do you love talking to people that only say “admin gold pls!?” Look no further, this job is for you. Must be able to fend off head-less chickens who scuttle past boundaries in hope to steal free crystals, answer all customer's requests. Looking for someone who is caring and secure about bank policies, able to think on their feet, and, the greatest of all, no Mammoths or Titans. Sorry about that, you’re too slow for our taste. w̶o̶w̶ ̶w̶e̶ ̶r̶ ̶s̶o̶ ̶r̶0̶0̶d̶. Every second that passes, a tanker thinks about applying, resolve quickly. _ 100 words.

Just a tip. I think posting a couple examples of the job descriptions would help the contestants a bit.

TOUR OPERATOR Any Map Do you like noobs; those clueless, dimwitted tankers who don’t seem to know what turret turning is? You’re in luck. A position as a tour operator, nothing is better. You must be able to withstand an inflated amount of pressure, have a marvelous sense of coordinates and direction, be obliged to perform various stunts to impress beginners, no smokies or thunders. Too explody for the youngbloods. Over all, you must sustain working both evenings and mornings, at least 18 hours a day. Be patient, fellow hope-to-be employee, and good luck with those n̶o̶o̶b̶s̶ ̶w̶h̶o̶ ̶t̶h̶i̶n̶k̶ ̶M̶a̶m̶m̶o̶t̶h̶ ̶i̶s̶ ̶f̶a̶s̶t̶ potential customers. _________________________________________________________________________________________________________ 100 words.

I see. Thanks for your help!

Wow, that's great, it works. Do you have any idea how I can keep on using Firefox though?

Okay, great, I just want you to find a link because I don't want to hit a virus :X I trust you more.

Hmm, okay, I'll try that out. Do you mind giving me a link to download the standalone player? And telling me how to insert battle links into it so I can play? I have a little memory about it, but I'm not quite sure where to look. Thanks.

Google Chrome takes too long to load.

Hey guys So I was logging onto Tanki the other day when this came up: I don't know how to solve it, I cleared my cache and stuff, I restarted my computer, I refreshed like it told me to. But I still don't know what's wrong. It's been going on for a few days. Oh, and I'd like to say that sometimes I can log on, but sometimes not, mostly not. Anybody know?

Very interesting indeed. Loving how this is laying out. ok how did he know my name.

Picture One Me and my comrades horse around candidly. One moment, I feel joy and delectation, the next moment, I don’t. I free fall toward my disastrous fore ordination. My optic is decimated into blurs of my past. I endure the streaks of colors streaking past my past. It transforms from purple, to red, to a pulchritudinous brilliance of a rainbow. I suddenly interpret of this, a̶n̶d̶ ̶r̶e̶a̶l̶i̶z̶e̶ ̶t̶h̶a̶t̶ ̶t̶h̶i̶s̶ ̶r̶e̶s̶e̶m̶b̶l̶e̶s̶ ̶t̶h̶a̶t̶ ̶o̶n̶e̶ ̶s̶c̶e̶n̶e̶ ̶i̶n̶ ̶T̶h̶e̶ ̶L̶E̶G̶O̶ ̶m̶o̶v̶i̶e̶ ̶p̶e̶r̶f̶e̶c̶t̶l̶y̶ and I register that the only one element that is causing this, lag. Which implies that I require exceptional internet connection. ________________________ 98 words, not including the title. Note that I am writing from Darren's perspective.

It's not cheating but I see what this guy means. Before I had to right equipment for XP/BP, I used M1 Railgun M2 hornet. I was in a duel, I was winning 5-2, blah blah blah. Then, the kid changed equipment. He put on M3 Hornet, M2 Railgun, Tundra. Talk about unfair right? So, I always shot him first. Then he shot me, I shot him. He should be dead right at this moment, but no - he's using Tundra -_- Then he shoots me. I die. I guess he presses delete and it counts down, 10 9 8 etc. He captures the flag, and explodes 1 second afterward. Why? His delete button. He self-destructed. I take his flag now, muttering some extremely colorful language under my breath. He respawns, goes to my base at full health, needs to get shot 3 times to get destroyed and takes my hit, hits me, I hit him, he hits me. I die. He captures the flag and self-destructs. Out of pure frustration I leave. ------ So there you have it, not really a cheat, but something extremely annoying.

It's legit, I promise.

Me and one of my friend's thoughts when we were noob. My friend's: -Thought Warrant Officers were called toasters. (Double toast, triple toaster, etc... this is all legit). -Thought he was too good so he didn't turn his turret. -Thought he would rank up when he killed a drugger. -Didn't know what battle fund was, thought it was a special turret. -------------------------- Me: -Thought Isida was legitimately called medic. -I thought I could fire anywhere, for instance I thought I could flame the enemies that were 80 meters away with my Firebird. -I thought I could fire through walls. (I recall once in a battle, I said "maybe I'll get a lucky shot *shoots at wall with Railgun* aw I didn't kill anyone." -I thought Marine, Forester, etc... were pro paints that only high ranks could get.

Man, best XP match in a while.

^Next issue, maybe early October? "7. The prize-winning entries will be announced in the next issue of the Newspaper."

You know it's a gold box when...:

I gaze at the descending sunset with my fellow comrades. The wholehearted beams of warmth gleaming on our elegant Wasps, magnifying streaks of enchanting colors winking from the meanderings of our aesthetic paints. We performed what we intended to do, an ambition from the inception. We wanted to soar through the skies, perform dubious stunts that would pervade every witness with consternation and wonderment. The three of us needed to pirouette through the heavens, circulating through the void, accomplishing something that no individual assumed was viable. This is our dream. This is our meaning of existence. This is our life. ______ 100 words, 632 characters. Good luck to all.