[Issue 44] The Adventures of a Nublet

[Night-Sisters 2,139]

The Adventures of a Nublet

 

 

 

Greetings. My apologies, but Night-Sisters had a large amount of Biology homework to complete, so it is I, , who will be crafting this article. Further introductions are unnecessary, as I am quite familiarly acquainted with the lot of you.

"What?" You inquire. "How in the world would this nublet fellow know me?"

I am glad you asked. You see, I am the the physical manifestation of the multing impulse that resides within all Tankers. 

Deny it if you like, but you and I both know of that little voice inside that tells you to 'accidentally' flip a teammate off the edge in Monte Carlo...with the flag. Or to mult in a tied battle, ripping victory from the grasp of your beleaguered team.  

I am that voice. So, without further ado. I give you, The Adventures of a Nublet.

 

---

 

Date: Unknown. 

Time: 1300. 

Location: Boombox.

 

It was a fine day in Tanki. The sun was shining, heated battles occurring, and I was winning in Boombox. The duel was fast-paced, and my opponent worthy, but the score was 5-3 in my favor.

For some time, we battled happily...and then, it happened. Exhibiting a remarkable show of poor driving, my opponent flipped. 

Nub mult troll that I am, I left the poor wasp on his head, and proceeded to capture another two flags.

 

Suddenly, at the bottom in chat:

 

 

Aha! What an opportunity!

 

#rekt. 

---

 

Date: Unknown.

Time: 1318.

Location: Farm.

 

Having had enough of Boombox for the day, I browsed into a tempting Farm, CTF. My team was losing, 5-7, but we were on the up-and-up, and a win seemed to be within grasp...

Well. It didn't take me long to remedy that! Equipping my trusty Mammoth, I proceeded to protect my flag.

I am pleased to report that not a soul got past my ponderous bulk.

 

 

---

 

Date: Unknown.

Time: 1325.

Location: Fort Knox.

 

I was busy multing in Fort Knox, taking great pains to construct a perfect D\L ratio of 0 and 18. My teammate grew frustrated with my evident trolling. I soon set her straight. 

 

 

---

 

Date: Unknown.

Time: 1337. 

Location: Polygon.

 

My gaming time was almost up, so in celebration of such a productive day, I decided to splurge a little and swing by a personal favorite: Polygon DM. 

Upon joining, the sight of a cumbersome Mammoth\Smoky sent me into the seventh-heaven of trolling ecstasy. I quickly threw on my trusty Wasp and when the opportunity presented itself, I nipped inside the spawning ghost of my lone opponent. Confused, it tried to escape from my evil clutches and respawn fully. But...hehe...due to mammoth's physical limitations and my savvy driving, it simply couldn't. I followed the beast hither.

 

 

 

 

And thither.

 

 

 

And over yonder.

 

 

Finally, driven to near-insanity by my perpetual harassment, the behemoth chunk of flubber stopped to pour a heart-wrenching plea of despair into the chat. 

 

 

 

---

 

Satisfied with my work, I logged off for the day.

 

Trolls complete.

 

This is signing out. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Edited December 6, 2015 by Phoenix-Warbird

[Darren4Turbo 4,913]

The funniest article in this issue.

 

Please do more adventures next time.

 

Well done, Night-Sisters! :)

Edited December 5, 2015 by Darren4Turbo

[Flexoo 6,980]

lolness

Edited December 4, 2015 by Flexoo

[HichigoShiiro 4,378]

*Looks at title*

 

Oh! Lham's writing this article again!

 

*Looks at author*

 

Wat.

 

*Reads*

 

Ok Lham you got beat. 

Edited December 4, 2015 by HichigoShiiro

[yoshi-1 1,096]

Good one!! :D

 

Love it! :wub: really funny! :wub: :wub:

[Quarks 2,255]

#lol

Multing and trolling is so fun on lower accounts when they know nothing.

[Cor7y 13,862]

This is, in many ways, a continuation of Remult's 'Chronicles of a Nug' series. Good job, N-S! Hoping to see more of these types of articles from you!

Edited December 4, 2015 by Cor7y

[lukey0 27,543]

Very nice with nice amount of humour.

 

I'd love to see another issue of this. :)

[Helindu_2014 830]

Perfetto!

[MandolinMarc 874]

*Looks at title*

 

Oh! Lham's writing this article again!

 

*Looks at author*

 

Wat.

 

*Reads*

 

Ok Lham you got beat. 

^ This!

 

One of my biggest worries with the TO Newspaper is it's started to get a bit disconnected from the game of Tanki itself and from its mission to report on the game+community. It's really refreshing to see a great article like this about the game itself that we can all relate to. The pictures make it awesome, as do the words hither and thither. Keep it up Night!

Edited December 5, 2015 by MandolinMarc

[Bugs.meeny 1,013]

This might be my new favorite article . . . 

[Mr.Cashier 1,622]

Nice! Your First Article and its amazing! Good Job

[irfaan12 4]

:wub:  :wub:  :wub:

Awesome article 

Pls do more of these

;)

[Destrod 2,634]

Bravo! bravo! In 2 years of my newspaper pleasure, never have I read a hilarious topic such as this! Keep doing more of these!

[KillerGnat 3,135]

So good NS. You're competing with Stratus for the "KillerGnat's favorite writer award" (I'm sure you two will be positively thrilled to hear that).

 

On my alt, I trolled and told people you could get five crystals from pressing command+w+crystals5. I got six victims  :D.

[MessagerAngel 33]

OMG the first one got me laughing lol i don't like the 2ed but 3rd is funny. :d :d

[beaku 2,656]

Loved it... Really hilarious... :lol:

[fordmustang12345 3,910]

Lol the second and third ones were hilarious

[M4ShermanNoob 3]

Well, being a bit of a "noob" myself, hence the name.

I found this well written, funny, enjoyable and insightful article to brighten my otherwise dull day perusing the Tanki forum.

Congrats sis, well done! loved it!

[PretzelPerfect 11]

Thumbs up!!

[Indra_Otsutsuki 329]

Awesmazing (awesome+amazing) article BTW I haven't actually see you on the forum as a news reporter...do you mind showing me your first newspaper?

[Gambit 94]

This was awesome! This would make a great on-going storyline!

[Quarks 2,255]

I have a new meaning to my nub account. I haz m1 Titan.

[euphonium 40]

are u sure it shouldn't b spelled "nooblet",  jes saynhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

[Night-Sisters 2,139]

Awesmazing (awesome+amazing) article BTW I haven't actually see you on the forum as a news reporter...do you mind showing me your first newspaper?

Thanks :)

 

You haven't seen me, because I just recently became a reporter. B) My first article was in Issue 43. (The Pathological Drugger.)