The Lost Tank - A novel by Sacrifice

[Sacrifice 2,278]

Reader caution advised

The Lost Tank is a novel written by Sacrifice, which spotlights the story of an 11 year old , 7th Grader - Carter, who, because of his innocence, fell into the miserable trap of scammers who stole his account. The consequences that Carter bore afterwards were immense. Losing friends, being blocked and worse. This is an eye-opener for all new tankers; a step to promote account safety and increase the playing experience of players in Tanki Online. All names used in the novel are completely fictional, and any relation is entirely coincidental.

 

 

 

CHAPTER NO #01: THE COMPLIMENT

It was a wonderful day. School had just bid farewell to the class 7 students. Summer had just begun and Tanki Online's birthday was just around the corner - this meant some serious in-game celebrations. Carter was more than enthusiastic to find out what the developers had in store for this year. He remembered the last year's celebrations: the discounts, Gold boxes and X2 Funds along with the in-game themed decorations, were all breath-taking. Unfortunately, last year Carter was not able to buy his favorite combo because he didn't have enough crystals. This year, he had played hard and saved a whopping 80k in hopes of buying the legendary M2 Railgun.

Things were just as Carter had planned. He was anxiously waiting for Semyon's (The then Community Manager) announcement. His patience was growing shorter and shorter. His excitement grew. I mean, what could go wrong? Carter thought to himself. But things did go wrong. After getting changed and grabbing snacks, Carter logged in to the game. He went straight to the garage, ignoring the annoying chat because why not to choose his tank for the day. He equipped Hornet M1 with Railgun M1 along with the Storm paint. It would be his last week with the M1's, so why not?

Got the equipment, tick that off the list! Carter though to himself. He went to the battles section and to look for an interesting battle. Sandbox? Nah.. Cross? I mean alright, yeah, okay, lets go with Cross. It was a Cross CTF (6v6). He entered the battle, and like always, his old PC was messing with him. The loading screen took 2 to 3 business days to load and then the sky turned dusky, tanks flew around like birds and after he had successfully wasted half a minute of the battle, the game screen loaded.

His ghost tank appeared on the screen, near an enemy Mammoth M1. He crept into the Mammoth, who looked quite annoyed by this and tried to get rid of him, but even a Mammoth with nitro can't compete with a Hornet. Carter flew out of the Mammoth, materialized, pressed his 3 key followed by space, and after an astonishing 180-degree rotation, he shot the Mammoth M1, who was killed instantly thanks to his already half life. Carter, like any player would, went for the enemy flag and soon got lost in the game.

Carter was usually never amused by anyone's tank or performance in the game except this time. This is where the problem began. One of the opponents who was defending the flag had Smoky M2 and Viking M2 along with the Savanna paint, full on supplies, playing like a pro as if he had been playing with this combo since he was born. Whenever Carter got near, he would send Carter back to his base dazed and irritated, with only a single shot.

Carter thought that he should compliment the guy. I mean yeah he is irritating me, but he deserves appreciation, said Carter. Carter typed into the battle chat, "Nice man, wish I had that combo, hehe." and went on with the gameplay. The guy responded immediately "Oh ty. This? Well it wont be difficult for you getting it too if I help XOXO". Immediately, a red exclamation mark popped up on the Friends icon at the top right corner of his screen. The guy he had just complimented had sent him a friend request. Adding experienced players to his friends list was Carter's all time wish. He accepted it. He didn't reply further to any of the comments and continued on with his game play.

They lost. Carter's team lost by 7 flags. Carter was not disheartened because he played for exposure, not for the win. He gratefully claimed his 188 crystals and clicked on the red exit cross. He went to the garage and started looking at his equipment and wondering as why he wasted so many crystals on stuff he didn't use. As he was doing so, he got an invitation to a battle. It was Zone CTF. The invitation was from the same guy whom he had complemented 5 minutes ago.

Okay, he thought and accepted the invitation. He didn't feel like he should go in to the battle, it was a 2 player battle [Did I mention that it was private?]. His senses told him that something was wrong. Stranger danger. He joined the battle, clearly uneasy with his choice.

When the game screen loaded, after the classic lag sequence, he noticed the guy had typed, "Hi" and was asking about his name. He gave a fake name. In turn, the guy said his name: Frank. He asked, "So, Kevin, you like my combo?". Carter replied with a yes. Frank then asked Carter how many crystals he had. He replied correctly, 80k, and asked why Frank had invited him to the battle.

"I want to buy you crystals", said Frank. Carter was moved. "And why on Earth would you do that? I am a stranger to you." said Carter.

"Yes but I like your character. My father is a millionaire. I can spare $50 on you. I want to be nice to you", said Frank.

"No thank you! You will take my password and steal my account. I don't need anything from you." Carter said.

"Listen to me bro, trust me! It will be quick. Anyways, I am sure you want crystals, right? Why would I steal your account anyways. I have my own, which is better than yours!" exclaimed Frank.

At this point, Carter thought, that maybe the guy just wanted to be nice. I mean what could go wrong? He doesn't want my account, he did say that and my account has my e-mail on it. "You promise me you are not lying?" asked Carter.

"Promise", said Frank (probably with his fingers crossed). Carter thought that a promise is a word, said by one soul to another soul and was to be obeyed and fulfilled. They should never be broken. Carter was innocent. He muttered out his password and asked how long it would take to get his crystals. "A minute, don't worry" replied Frank. Immediately, the screen went black. "There was a problem. You are disconnected from the server. Enter the game again?" it said on the screen. Carter's instincts told him that something was wrong, but he didn't quite yet know what was wrong.

 

 

 

[To be continued..]

 

 

[kaisdf 3,320]

Article approved.

 

Wise words. I too had my first account banned after falling for the classic "gimme ur pass for free crys" trick.

 

In direct speech, different people have to have their speech separated as a new paragraph.

 

You had a lot of weird and unnecessary emphasis on words, bold, italics, and a strong colour to draw attention to things that weren't particularly important. You should use colours very sparingly, beyond perhaps titles. I removed all of it, because it looks aggressive, and served no purpose.

 

Edits:

• Unnecessary commas
• Poor use of conjunctions - "by" when you meant from/with/etc.
• Deleted some double spaces between words
• Removed the weird emphasis

​

[Sacrifice 2,278]

Article approved.

 

Wise words. I too had my first account banned after falling for the classic "gimme ur pass for free crys" trick.

 

In direct speech, different people have to have their speech separated as a new paragraph.

 

You had a lot of weird and unnecessary emphasis on words, bold, italics, and a strong colour to draw attention to things that weren't particularly important. You should use colours very sparingly, beyond perhaps titles. I removed all of it, because it looks aggressive, and served no purpose.

 

Edits:

• Unnecessary commas
• Poor use of conjunctions - "by" when you meant from/with/etc.
• Deleted some double spaces between words
• Removed the weird emphasis

​

Every tanker has gone through the same cycle of 'gimme your pass for free crys' :D

Thank you for pointing out those mistakes. I will try to keep an eye on them in the future. Thanks :)

[Unregular 27]

Every tanker has gone through the same cycle of 'gimme your pass for free crys' :D

Thank you for pointing out those mistakes. I will try to keep an eye on them in the future. Thanks :)

Nice article man. Great storyline and gives a nice advice to the newbies.

Well done man keep up the good work!!

[Sacrifice 2,278]

Nice article man. Great storyline and gives a nice advice to the newbies.

Well done man keep up the good work!!

Thanks for the appreciation man. It goes a long way. And yes, I will definitely try ;)

[Cyber2_O.o 64]

Every tanker has gone through the same cycle of 'gimme your pass for free crys' :D

Hehe that never happened to me, but I still got hacked twice.  <_< I mean, how does that even work?!

Anyway, it's a great story! I wonder what will happen next to Carter...  ;) Can't wait for Chapter 2!

[Sacrifice 2,278]

Hehe that never happened to me, but I still got hacked twice. <_< I mean, how does that even work?!

Anyway, it's a great story! I wonder what will happen next to Carter... ;) Can't wait for Chapter 2!

Well I tried my very best to place a cliff hanger over there. Anyways, next story would be as surprising, that I can assure you ;)

[Jade 1,420]

rip Carter :(

 

Good ol' 'I wanna buy you crystals' hahaha

[Sacrifice 2,278]

rip Carter :(

 

Good ol' 'I wanna buy you crystals' hahaha

Yeah no scam,' I wanna buy you crystals' :D

 

 

Sadly, I have been there many times. #innocentSoul

3:

 

 

Edited July 11, 2019 by Sacrifice

[Person_Random 4,991]

Excellent first story!  I enjoy reading Tanki stories just as much, if not more, than other stories.  (Random to Random: nice job insulting yourself, it's common knowledge you only write random stories).  As good as the plot is right now, it can definitely be strengthened if you incorporated some more description to make the reader feel like they are in the story.  Kaisdf is right, your italics, bolds, strikethroughs, though they do attract the reader's attention (SAT prep tip), they also are slightly distracting.  Also, you may want to add transitions into your story.  I noticed a lot of "Carter", "he", "the", and several more.  Adding some transitions into your stories will give you some more flair into your plot as well as give the reader a sense of the time.   Another thing that I noticed was that you used X2, 6v6, 80k, which should be (double, teams of six, eighty thousand crystals)  Those words are more 'game slang', so it should be kept to dialogue only.  (don't forget: write out every number below twenty or fifty, im not sure which one you stop writing them out at).  Overall, though, I really enjoyed the plot!  I can't wait for the next installment!

[Sacrifice 2,278]

 

 

Excellent first story! I enjoy reading Tanki stories just as much, if not more, than other stories. (Random to Random: nice job insulting yourself, it's common knowledge you only write random stories). As good as the plot is right now, it can definitely be strengthened if you incorporated some more description to make the reader feel like they are in the story. Kaisdf is right, your italics, bolds, strikethroughs, though they do attract the reader's attention (SAT prep tip), they also are slightly distracting. Also, you may want to add transitions into your story. I noticed a lot of "Carter", "he", "the", and several more. Adding some transitions into your stories will give you some more flair into your plot as well as give the reader a sense of the time. Another thing that I noticed was that you used X2, 6v6, 80k, which should be (double, teams of six, eighty thousand crystals) Those words are more 'game slang', so it should be kept to dialogue only. (don't forget: write out every number below twenty or fifty, im not sure which one you stop writing them out at). Overall, though, I really enjoyed the plot! I can't wait for the next installment!

 

 

 

Thank you so much! I have read the improvements that you have advised. They do make sense and I agree with you. I will try my best to keep them in mind while writing chapter 2. Thank you for those kind words. They go a long, long way. Deeply appreciated! :) Edited July 13, 2019 by Sacrifice

[FrozenRailgun 1,771]

 

At this point, Carter thought, that maybe the guy just wanted to be nice. I mean what could go wrong? He doesn't want my account, he did say that and my account has my e-mail on it. "You promise me you are not lying?" asked Carter.

 

"Promise", said Frank (probably with his fingers crossed). Carter thought that a promise is a word, said by one soul to another soul and was to be obeyed and fulfilled. They should never be broken. Carter was innocent. He muttered out his password and asked how long it would take to get his crystals. "A minute, don't worry" replied Frank. Immediately, the screen went black. "There was a problem. You are disconnected from the server. Enter the game again?" it said on the screen. Carter's instincts told him that something was wrong, but he didn't quite yet know what was wrong.

 

Uh-oh..... :wacko:

[Sacrifice 2,278]

Uh-oh..... :wacko:

Yeah :(

[Venerable 2,968]

Wow, nice story Sacrifice!

I see that this was before you bacame a Reporter... 

I don't see the sequel to this story anywhere though...