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In short, videos

Normal Battle Funds, Valentine's Sale and 25% Discount. Bit obvious, isn't it?

That gave me an interesting image

The cringe moment when he says "Tanks Online"... Looking through old posts, found this bad boy. Memory flashback http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n7wtxEYHyEI

The one legacy you will leave behind. :lol: Selamat Jalan!

Actually, possibly.

Get out of here. Nick deserves all the credit he gets. He's done a pile for the community. Nobody's worshipping him, they're admiring him, and to be frank, he deserves it. If everything you say is negative, we don't want you. Got it? Thanks.

Definitely St. Nick.

Take care

There should be some details about Light Format next issue.

Admittedly, we did go through a period of getting spoilt. But, with all of these new extortionate paints, two new pricey weapons, you would have forgot someone would have the compassion to at least throw out some sort of sale above 25%. Maybe just 50% on paints or something. Thanks all the same, esp. for the alert for Feb 23rd.

Tough customer, huh? Vulcan's release this month has received mixed opinions, with many struggling to get to grips with this unique weapon. Have you tried learning and given up? Turret control baffled you? Or are you just interested in learning the tips and tricks of a new weapon with bags of potential? This is the guide for you! We can safely say that Vulcan's release was the "big thing" this month. A new weapon always is guaranteed to raise eyebrows, but Vulcan perhaps more so than others. With an unlimited charge, gyroscope and even a self-damage feature, many are still yet to get to grips with this trickier-than-expected weapon. But seeing a Vulcan wielded by a top player is enough to scare anyone - it sure has potential. So let's see if we gain some tips on how to use this weapon effectively. Learn your "Gyroscope"!"Gyroscope? Wut?" Many players have come out of testing or practising with Vulcan confused by this auto-turning feature. Let's admit it - it's tough to master. But, let's establish firstly and foremost what it does. This is the most important thing to learn with Vulcan. Here is the gist of it. Gyroscope only takes affect when you begin shooting. When shooting, your turret will automatically stay in the same line even when your tank is turning. Thus, your turret "automatically moves" when you are turning. However, your turret is still able to turn by itself. Let's quickly dissect that phrase. You see an enemy; you start shooting him with your Vulcan. Now, does that mean you can just drive around turning your hull and you're guarantee to just keep on hitting him? Absolutely NOT. Why, you ask? Surely my "gyroscope" means that even if I turn my tank and my turret automatically turns to face the original direction. You're right. But you forgot to factor in one thing. Enemies move. Yep, no joke Sherlock. The enemies do move, and if you turn your tank all your Vulcan is going to do is be shooting the thin air where your enemy was. So you have to adapt your turret. People somehow have this belief that your Vulcan locks onto enemies when you start hitting them. Wrong. You must be in control of your turret. When shooting, Avoid turning your hullSo, the simplest of tips for beginners to begin with. When you start playing Vulcan, drive like your normal self but when you engage in shooting, avoid turning your hull. All it is does is confuse things when you start off. Just focus on your Forward-backward movement and your turret. That's enough to think of without worrying how your turret will move laterally. Practise is the key for Vulcan. You've got to just do the easy stuff first, before attempting doing too many things difficult. As many of us have found out, turning your tank too early in your practise with the weapon will inevitably lead to missed shots and embarrassment, particularly if you are a higher rank. Keep it simple to start with. When "gyroscoping", your turret will turn in the opposite direction to your tank​If you've decided to get off the "baby-food" and try using Vulcan like a pro, test this for yourself. Enter a battle with your Vulcan and then shoot, and press the Right hour. You'll see your turret turning left. Likewise with the Left Arrow. Fact. You may already know this, but it takes a while to settle in your mind. Keep it in your head. Accompanied by this comes the knowledge that your tank turns faster than your turret. So dont think with this logic - If I turn my turret right while Im turning my hull right, it will stay straight in line with my hull. Because if you think this way, you'll unfortunately be greatly mistaken. Unless you've got a Mammoth, your hull will turn much quicker than your turret, thus disorientating you. Again, this comes with practise. Join a battle and try out aiming long distance at an object like a house window, whilst turning your tank and your turret. Perfect way to get to grips with the weapon. Charge early.Another quick pointer. Vulcan charges for a second when rotating its barrels before it begins shooting. So, naturally, if you want to get maximum benefit out of your weapon, charge a second before you go into the open. Genius, huh? But be aware that you will want to be careful when you pop out with your Vulcan. Try not to leave yourself exposed whilst your barrels are getting ready to fire. Not wise. Think Railgun pop-out. That's what you've got to use on this weapon too. Release space-bar when you can't see an enemyDuh. But point stands. You don't want to overheat unnecessarily. Shooting indefinitely is not wise with Vulcan. You may think Infinite Ammo is a reason to put a brick on that spacebar, but the aspect of overheating is surely reason enough for you to release shooting when no enemy is in sight. Also, make sure you're careful too, even when you see enemies to be aware of your health. No reason to start overheating when you are sniping and have extremely low health. Suicidal - quite literally. Automatically resist the temptation of moving close-rangeDon't. Please don't. Let's be straight here. Vulcan is not a weapon to use for flag-carriers. As we've established, it's pretty difficult to shoot clearly while driving - and even if you've mastered this, the purpose of Vulcan is its fantastic Damage per second - from range. Vulcan is also brilliant at precise accuracy from distance. So avoid wasting your turret's wonderful abilities by running into short-range confrontations. You will often win, especially if you're good at close-range accuracy, but it's a waste of a wonderful weapon. Of course, there are unavoidable events, like, when you have to return a flag. Then, it would be sabotage to not to move towards it. But in most circumstances, range is good. However, I would say that if your position is a drought of opponent tanks, and you must move closer-range to be able to find some prey then go for it. There's no purpose staying somewhere for the purpose of being "long-distance" when you have nobody in your eye-line half of the time. Don't be afraid of overheating in Team BattlesI'm sure you've heard the phrase "Take one for the team". Vulcaners will be having to hear this phrase a whole lot more, with their self-damage effect. I said earlier that you don't want to hold spacebar when you can't see enemies, and combined with that, even if you see enemies, try and avoid overheating. But, on the flip side, if you've got enemies to aim at, especially in a team battle, then don't be afraid to over-heat. Now, overheating doesn't do too much damage to yourself, even though it can be costly. This overheating business is another reason why Vulcan is normally equipped with the heavier hulls, to ensure health does not drop too quickly. But, if you're in a good position in the enemy base which isn't particularly secure but is annihilating many of the defenders, then don't say to yourself "You know what, I'll stop shooting." Sooner or later, a player will come after you and kill you anyway, so you may as well use the time you've got to keep shooting. Say there's a Freeze Mammoth in defence for example, and his "pet Isida" has died. You should probably just keep shooting him to clear him out of the way, whether or not you will do yourself significant harm at the same time, because waiting will mean the Isida will probably get back to heal. Discernment is the key. It's making sure you're not stupid and throw away all your health but at the same time, using the fantastic damage you have got to benefit your team. Equip some Firebird protectionIn the light of this, equipping Firebird protection is smart. After all, if you didn't know, your self-burning effect will be lowered if you defend yourself with Firebird prot. So might be wise to get a paint with a chunky piece of Firebird protection when using Vulcan. Bit like a Thunder using Thunder protection. Not much needed to say here, but do keep in mind that your Firebird protection, unless it's Zeus, won't do a massive amount if you use your Vulcan wisely and avoid too much afterburn. Still, it's a good use of a paint. Double Powers are perfectPerfect - pushing it, you might say. But Vulcan, in my opinion, like Hammer, is one of the best weapons to use a Double Power with. Why, you say? Firstly, think maths. If you have 24 Chickens and you multiply them by two, you will get 24 extra chickens. If you have 10 Chickens and you multiply them by two, you'll only get 10 extra chickens. Weird analogy, but it's applicable to Vulcan. The high DPS means that with a Double Power, you are basically doubling a high DPS - making a pretty unstoppable force. Secondly, a Double Power does not affect your afterburn. Yep, so you'll only be burning the same amount as you were. Thirdly, Vulcan's long-distance shooting means it is less likely for you to withstand shooting, meaning that Double Armours - and nitros - aren't such a big deal. So, Double Powers are perfect. Basically. Play it like a Railgun-VikingApproaching the end now, and this is almost a sum-up of the type of Gameplay you should use with Vulcan. Railgun-Viking. Especially applicable if you use Vulcan with a medium hull, which in my opinion, is certainly the most effective to use this weapon, unless you plan to use it as a brute-force camper. Railgun-Viking gameplay is something most of us tankers will be familiar with as two of the most popular hulls in the game. A pop-out, stay in cover style player. And Vulcan is really effective at it. Mirror your Railgun-Viking gameplay with it, and you'll be surprised at the effectiveness. Of course, you will have differences as you will be in the open more often, but it's a similar style. Just something to maybe keep in your mind as you try to use Vulcan effectively in your battles. Pick a vantage point in the Enemy BaseFinally, a direct point about where Vulcan should be used. My personal preference with Vulcan is either in a camping spot in the Enemy base, or in your base. However, describing gameplay in your own base - after all, it's sit; camp; hold off attackers. In attack, however, it's much more diverse. Running away from dangerous defenders whilst damaging those disgusting defensive Isidas. It's great fun. And that's what Vulcan is. So in picking your vantage point, bear in mind a few things. Firstly, you must have the freedom of the campers to aim at. It's important to be able to damage those who are really the threats to your attacking players. Secondly, have a go-to route to escape if you are turned on. And thirdly, discern your self-damaging. Leave yourself cover to re-charge if you are on low health. The below picture describes what I feel is a pretty good position to use with Vulcan in Silence. Of course, it depends on what the defenders are, but if they're all short-range this is a great place to fire on them and get some dividends for your efforts. So, some tips for you as you go out to use that Vulcan. Keep practising and don't fall into the trap of thinking that it's too much effort. When wielded properly, this weapon can be a serious force to be reckoned with. All the best tankers, and keep Vulcaning!

It's been a year. A year since the longest series ever to appear in the Tanki Online English Community Newspaper finished. "In the Beginning, Tanki" was done. Completed. Supposedly. 2014 has now come and gone, and the fondness of the memories many have had over the past year left to slumber. It's time to once again resurrect those glorious days of old. Join me as we travel through the first half of 2014 - yes, "In the Beginning, Tanki" is back! _________________________________________ Previous articles in this series: Read Part 1 Here (Beginning - December 2009) Read Part 2 Here (January 2010 - June 2010) Read Part 3 Here (July 2010 - December 2010) Read Part 4 Here (January 2011 – June 2011) Read Part 5 Here (July 2011 – December 2011) Read Part 6 Here (January 2012 – June 2012) Read Part 7 Here (July 2012 - December 2012) Read Part 8 Here (January 2013 - June 2013) Read Part 9 Here (July 2013 - December 2013) _________________________________________ As I begin to compose this article, a year after I thought I had finished it for good, I am surprised by how much I look forward to once again researching, reminiscing and reminding not only you readers but also myself of all that has happened this past year in Tanki. Once again, I'm sure many of you will remember events far clearer than myself. But after requests from a number of forumers, I've decided to continue the series. Well, let's not waste any time. We kick off straight away on the first month - the first day - of 2014. How about some context to get us going? Micro-Upgrades had entered the game just a couple of weeks before, accompanied as many would remember by the influx of crystals that came with the "Crystals for Ranks" update. Just a week before that, Tanki had welcomed in the New Physics, most remembered for reducing the once-deadly Freeze effect and giving Ricochet a boost which would catapult it from what many called "a shadow of its former self" to a favourite at not only the low ranks, but also the high. Not just for the weapons, the update was primarily aimed at re-working the hulls and is also remembered for starting off the decline of Mammoth, as well as introducing the Drift which has made Hornet the far-and-away favourite hull to a significant number of players. Well, now was the New Years, and we all know what that means. A special discount. How about 50% on everything? For many players, especially more experienced ones, this discount was the most memorable in their Tanki history. Why, you ask? Well, let's just remember that two weeks ago, Crystals for Ranks had been released. Result? It meant that players who were Generallisimos at the time of the update would receive a colossal 314,000 crystals. Yeah, you heard that right! And with the New Year around the corner, the majority of players saved and were rewarded with what is rumoured to have been the biggest post-refund spending spree of crystals Tanki has ever had. That's what you call a late Christmas present! A December full of change was to take time to adapt to, and the month passed with players getting used to the New Physics and their new equipment. With the Visual Rank-up effect also recently added, players were having some extra fun with their rank-up parties; and the new turn-off-crystal-boxes feature in Pro Battles was good news for the many gamers who wanted bigger funds in their serious XP Battles. It was the end of the month where the first release of the month came- well I say release, perhaps that might not be the best word. The return of Madness! It had been 2 years since many players had played on their favourite map of old days, and after a sneak-peek of it's work in progress a couple of months before, it finally hit the servers in a big update named "Reworking of maps". The update is also memorable for low ranks at the time for another reason - suddenly the rank limits for all the maps flew down. By the time a player reached WO4, he would have unlocked every single map in the game - a serious change from the days when you had to rank all the way to General to unlock a couple of the maps! Maps changed too - Silence was most famously re-shuffled, with the "Silence II" version exiting the game; similarly maps like Highland and Brest were merged and their second version was removed from the game. A period of change was not deterring activity on all forms of social media. The forum was busy to say the least, with the famous "Photo of the Day" topic at its peak times - sometimes, 10 Pages would fill up each day. Names like FatalTank, sky128 and Aklism were becoming well-known faces; the forum was packed with contests such as the "Guides" and "Rusty Barrels" as well as one-offs such as a demonstration of the dynamic lighting in the "Come to Light" Facebook contest. It was February all too soon, and an interesting update would be released to enhance log-in and account security. With Facebook becoming a key platform for the majority of Internet users, the ability to log on via Facebook was released, enabling fast log-ins as well as extended security for accounts. Undebatable, that update of course. Just a benefit. However, Tanki would have a couple of debatable updates that month. Just a couple of days later they pulled out a bombshell. In a list of several maps, they announced that they were to remove all but two of the maps due to "lack of playing time". Some of these, such as Hill, Courage, Arena and Deck-9, were extremely popular. Thankfully, Tanki turned back on their decision even though Deck 9 and Canyon, two stalwart smaller old maps, would be removed later in the year to the disdain of many players. It would get even more debatable. There was to be more controversy in that month rooted from the decision of the developers. In February 2014, two words were literally all I would have needed to start off a heated debate on a lobby chat. Any guesses? Yep. Product Kits. The situation didn't help by an accidental error making the kits prices originally higher than they should have been. However, it swung both ways. Some thought that creating kits so expensive was favouring buyers. Others thought that the reason for new kits had been to stop the product kits for Marshal-unlock paints such as Prodigi being included in Second Lieutenant+ kits. However, it was backfired - the Paint Kit M2 would contain Prodigi. On the other hand, this update would hold the most popular kit of all time - the Brigadier Railgun-Hornet kit. This was the beginning of many XP players, and the Railgun-Hornet combination hit new heights at the higher levels. An interface change later in the month for the homepage was eye-catching as the Tanki site was refurbished with a "new look" gracing the homepage. I'm sure most of you remember the old homepage with the news feed running down the side, like me. I do miss the old homepage, but the large consensus was positive as Tanki turned up the heat on their Public Relations frontier. A stalwart event which gripped many players in 2014 would soon begin in February - the days of double funds. Although the first was due to the Data Center being successfully moved, and gifted for a week, it would begin the rampant double funds - so much so that it got to a stage when nearly every week had a day of double funds for a period. March was on the doorsteps as developers began work on the Unity Version of Tanki that we still await. A couple of sales and a few other tweaks but overall, the community was satisfied and the game was growing nicely. A key update during March would soon come. The removal of the Team Kick. Mixed opinions again. Many players were glad - they had been kicked out just because players wanted their friends in - or even wanted to take more funds for themselves. But at the same time, the ability of mults sabotaging a team suddenly grew significantly. Players could no longer kick them out but they would have to wait for a moderator who would have to go through a process which could take a while, or even be impossible due to a low rank sabotaging the team by playing to their full potential but with poor equipment. Thankfully, a week later, an update came out that in my opinion was one of the brightest moments of 2014. The long-awaited ability to change equipment inside battles was finally released to the public to a wave of appreciation. Finally, players wouldn't have to quit a game to get that paint they needed and then wait outside till a space was opened up. Gameplay became so much more dynamic, teamwork took on a new level as players considered what combinations would be most suited to the situations. An absolutely vital update, and with the installed time limits, it was executed to perfection. Another memorable moment of the year would be on its way. The release of a map. Yep, that's right! Rio was out, and with it a uber-cool contest offering 1 million crystals to conquer the peak of the Building. An incredible video from the German Parkour team won the plaudits, but most players were just appreciating the beauty of the map. Combined with the coming release of Tanki Online Brazil, Rio was a new step in the graphics of the game with a skybox to put your heart in your mouth. It was soon April - the month where Tanki Online Brazil would be released for our South American friends. Built up to say the least, and the publicizing of the event certainly kick-started the game as players begun to join from parts of the globe where the breakthrough had not yet occurred. And meanwhile, in our neck of the woods, events were flying. Over on Social media, Video of the Week and particularly Question of the Week was thriving and Tanki's Facebook page was getting more and more popular. As for the game, a number of discounts graced the game. Within two weeks, Viking had a 50% Discount as did Micro-Upgrades and all the Medium Hulls. As well as this, there were discounts on buying crsytals, as well as the removal of SMS Commissions which would stay on in the game. And I can't forget - one of the most popular Holiday paints since Tanki began them in 2010 was established for the Cosmonautics Day. Here's a picture; beautiful huh? Discounts would often disguise dubious updates however, and certainly at the end of April, a major re-balancing of turrets and hulls hit hard as players began to unscramble the changes. A video detailing the changes can be seen if you are interested in remembering it. There were positives however, and soon players weren't complaining - as normal, the update just had taken some time to get used to. Meanwhile, The Newspaper was going through a rough time. It had just been moved away from the Press Forum to in-game occasional articles in April. Without much writing going on and no issues, it was difficult to produce much, and it would soon head back to its home here on the forum. Fair to say that 2014 was buzzing along nicely for players. Discounts and Double Battle Funds paved the floor with gold as players began to take the gifts for granted. The May Holidays popped up with only 25% off everything just a couple of weeks after 50% had covered a number of products causing some players to rant about the lack of a 50% Discount. But, even if they were being spoilt, Tanki didn't seem to mind. The 5th Birthday of Tanki was celebrated in style at the end of May, with a week full of 50% Discounts, Double Battle Funds and 3000-crystal gold boxes sounding like one pretty serious party to me! Along with this came a surprise mid-year "THE GAME", most memorable for the Ping Pong Secret Room with "The Rock" pinned to the wall. May did hold some twists and turns however, and near the end of May saw the heralding of a major Map Update. The release of Rio had seen the first map with "self-destruct zones" added to the game, and now Tanki would introduce this on significant numbers of other maps. For example, Silence was made a lot larger, and self-destruct zones were added in many areas of the map. This update wasn't primarily to change gameplay but rather for visual enhancement, so that some of the maps didn't appear to be "floating" at the edges, but rather went on further into untouchable land. And the summer approached already. It was soon June and another popular update was on its way. Firstly, and most significantly, it's aim was of a revitalisation for the CP Mode. CP had gone from quite popular at its entrance to certainly the least played game modes. And Tanki knew the potential this had to create dynamic gameplay and enjoyment for players. So they added the ability of CP Mode to every single map and also made Point-Capturing give players much higher scores. This added to the intentions of the players to capture a point making for much more intense fighting. Along with the CP Update came a number of small tweaks. For example, the Gold Box Notification was turned Orange due to Visibility problems; and Chat would now only be unlocked at Gefreiter. All round, no complaints from players. An update fixing and not creating problems. Just as the devs intended. As the game was getting along, so was the community. Tanki signed a Contract with "Starladder" in late May, meaning that the Cybersport World was preparing for the beginning of Starladder in Tanki in a revolutionary change to Tanki eSports. As for Semyon's work - well, June heralded the start of the weekly VLOG. A fantastic introduction, it kept players up to date with news and it's fair to say that Semyon's rep went up among all of the community. Anything else in June 2014? Of course! The FIFA World Cup! Tanki followed in with the rest of the world by creating paints for each of the teams in the Cup. Players who bought the paint of any of the Top 3 Finishers would receive prizes. Most of the players chose Brazil. What a shame... And fittingly, there goes the half-time whistle. Believe me, the next half is absolutely packed. Stay tuned for next issue as we - once again - reach the end of ITBT for now! Thanks for reading! ;)

Greetings, readers! Here at the Tanki Online newspaper press, we are passionate about providing you with information on all the latest updates, turrets, hulls, maps, contests, anything related to the community or game, and you can trust us to cover it all. But the Newspaper isn't all about boring facts and figures. What about the stuff that's been going on behind your backs this month? Here at the Dictator, we fill in where the rest of the paper does not, delivering you shocking news stories and fresh rumours direct from the battle-lines. Enjoy! Hog: K. Would you like the good news first or the bad news? K, the bad news. The bad news is that Fen-Harel hax0red his way into The Dictator and you will have to read his writings this month. Yeah. *swallows* Well, the good news is that Fen-Harel hax0red his way into The Dictator and now we're going to have levels of banter that have not been seen before. I would say one outweighs the other, but that would imply in some way that Fen-Harel is fatter than himself. Which does sound slightly odd. Kev: Fen gets "Longest Dictator Piece" prize, and the "Shortest Dictator Writer" prize too. Congratulations! Fen: Told you I'd get in here eventually. Uncovered: the secret behind Vulcan's power-source! By @hogree A twelve-year-old kid walks innocently down the back-streets of Rio. He spots a ball in the street and does some keepy-ups whilst doing a samba and eating a Brazilian burrito. All of a sudden, his burrito explodes. A light appears within his hands as bright as the Sun. "I am Vulcan. And you will be my slave." He drops the burrito and runs. Immediately, he feels a pain in his back and yelps in a mixture of Spanish and Portuguese. Everything goes black. And then white. And then rainbows! And then black again. Okay, so that story was entirely fiction. But its certainly a plausible option. With the release at the beginning of February, Vulcan's ammunition has been under fire this month. Debates have regularly overheated (These references are on fire) this month due to the seeming unlimited force of blinding ammunition the weapon stores. Is it powered by the Sun? Maybe a new form of radiation? Or even Fen-Harel's brain? After all, it's light. But scientists reviewing Vulcan have made progress in deducing the source behind the charge that stores the ammunition. According to them, the animals are in control. Yes, after weeks of experimentation, Vulcan's turning barrels have been recognised as inspired from rhinoceroses. As a publication from the official "Vulcan Committee" accompanying the picture, the following was written: "After studying the rhinoceros' tusk, we have come to an understanding that rhinoceroses are in control of Vulcan and animals have invaded Tanki." Reactions have been mixed among players. Many have been scared stiff at the idea that they may be playing a game which animals have controlled with many community members such as lordmostafa pleading "If rhinoceroses are in the game, the inevitable result will be that rhinoceroses will come out of our computers and eat us alive." Interesting perception. However, others are less worried. Dogm45 scoffed at the reports. "I've been playing with an extinct mammoth for years, and you expect me to scared by some rhinoceroses? Bring them on. I'd like to see them handle the Ice Age." Developers worried as reports claim players "don't love In Love" By @Kevred With a extensive 90% discount and a fully revised look, developers were expecting the amount of In Love users to rocket sky-high. Unfortunately, as February comes to an end, the Tanki server’s data suggests otherwise. As Fen-Harel’s keen to put it, “It’s as popular as Hog’s singing.” Effectively, the ratio of Tanks sporting In Love/Total Tanks is still at near zero percent, shocking the devs even more than the 58 down-votes on the 'Updated Rail/Smoky/Shaft Parameters' topic. Suspecting a technical error, they diverted their cafeteria’s budget to renew the entirety of their servers. After a long and thorough double-check, the numbers were, regrettably, still lower than Fen. Thus, employees are no longer able to afford fresh chicken, forced to stick to processed salmon instead. A certain Mr. Hog was caught attempting to jump off the roof of his house that day. In a Russian survey about In Love, opinions ranged from simplistic “it suks”, to wise observations “this ain’t dora the explorer”, not to forget the short but honest “ugly”. That last remark was too much for poor Hazel-Rah, who is rumored to have left the Tanki bureau in tears, accompanied of more than a few coughing breakdowns. It is said that V-Log 34 was restarted as a consequence of Mr. Kirov’s sudden laughing fit. It seems that, all in all, In Love is doomed to disappear and give way to newer paints such as “Lord”. Player RIPCrystalBoxes is rumored to have created another alt, RIP</3. Fen-Harel with "the mad plays" as The Dictator succumbs in dramatic circumstances By @hogree I'm sure one question is rolling round your minds right now. Okay, two questions. What is the laziest means possible to get to the kitchen and why has Fen-Harel suddenly joined The Dictator. Firstly, I would suggest barrel-rolling. Doesn't use your legs. Always positive. As for the second question, well, to cut a long story short, let's just say that he basically bribed us with seven refrigerators and two plane-tickets to the beaches of Northern Antarctica. Sort of. Ok, he didn't. As we heard in much amusement last issue, Fen was booted out of the premises with a skaladooshjitsu-inspired Kevred-special after his periodic-table escapades. After swimming in his woes for a couple of days, he grabs his Physics Homework book and reads out loud in a strong Serbian accent. "Every action has an equal and opposite reaction." He laughs and does a belly dance. So, after two lessons with a taekwondo master, a successful pull-up and a frankly incredible gossip update, Fen charges back into the headquarters and confronts Kevred. Powered by his own pull-up-intensified ego he pulls it out of the bag - a Fen the Harel double-noplshogstar. One down, one to go. I won't detail the rest of it - all I'll say is that since our little meeting, Chicken has no longer tasted like chicken. So, we've got a new recruit among the ranks. Feel free to welcome him. But if you're like me, I think a couple of slices of "toast" will be on the menu. An extra-long lesson as Developers go back to paint school By @Fen-Harel With the new paints already in the game, it's time the Dictator looks into their creation process. Developers studied hard for this edition of paints and brought us a whole new style that can come only from the classroom. Here is our inside scoop on what was going on while the paints were being designed. Naturally for our programmers first up was the computer science class where they were caught playing video games. In order to avoid suspicion they cunningly took a screenshot of the game and painted it on a tank, creating the all new Invader and Pixel (game froze on one of the developers) paints. Afterwards came the physics class where our developers had a lot of inspiration for new futuristic paints. With a bright and relaxing design and good protections Atom and Nano might just be the optimal choice for most. As nice as the paints look, it didn't take long to find the horrible flaw in them. The model of the atom displayed on the Atom garage icon is outdated. Yes, for all the normal people out there this has absolutely no impact on anything whatsoever, but GoldRock and I couldn't help but cringe at the picture. Next we had the Biology class... sort of. Watching all those bacteria and studying about mitosis wasn't really inspirational for the developers, so they went out to see nature up close in the closest zoo. Rumors are a developer got attacked by a racoon, then as he was running away he hit a beehive. The other developers had quite an entertaining view and decided to pay the honours to their little furry friend and the buzzing hive for allowing them to laugh at their co-workers expense. Returning to class just in time to be late by 10 minutes the developers took their seats in Art class. This was the one they were waiting for and designers were ready to get some new ideas. With pencils and brushes in their hands they started doing what they do best- designing. Quickly, the Graffiti paint was introduced, followed by Fracture. However one of the designers was acting more relaxed than usual, painting Vortex. After being asked what it represented he replied that he had a wonderful vision that made him paint it. Yes, it was a busy day for the Dictator and with only History and Geography left, we were curious as what else the developers might think of. However, the security caught me and since I was only a guest in the team, I didn't have any official passes. Security guards weren't very compassionate and I was told to leave the school immediately. Luckily, with my stealth and espionage skills, I managed to find someone who had all that inside info. Then sadly, he wasn't very cooperative since the conversation went something along these lines: "Sir, can you just tell me anything about what's going on in the classroom, I'm working on an articl..." "For the last time... I'm only the janitor, now get out of the toilet!" You get the point... Some unofficial rumors have also been floating around that the developers went to visit Ostrica after school. It went so far that Ostrica herself helped in the creation of the new paints, sending a sample of her garden to Perm. Tanki's best scientists threw it all on one of the tanks, the material stuck and was afterwards named Mars. Have chickens been sighted in Tanki?! By @hogree No. Unfortunately. If you want to read more from The Dictator, here are the news reports from previous months! July 2014 August 2014 September 2014 October 2014 November 2014 January 2015

StarSeries Season III has got off to a buzzing start, with the top 12 clans in the entire game opening their accounts with a much-awaited brand new season in late January. Now, with almost half of the matches played, the first signs of who might be heading for the Finals this season are beginning to show! Inside this Update, we have a Review of the season so far, interviews with two top StarSeries players and an ex-commentator, as well as a plan for 15 Games you can't miss this month! Whether you are an avid eSports follower or just a player interested in watching the top of the top and wanting to know more, this StarSeries Update is for you! CONTEXT Let's start off with some quick context on the whole StarSeries thing. Starladder, which joined Tanki about a year ago, was a revolutionary change in the way clans, cybersport and streaming would operate in Tanki. With the change came a split in the levels of clans. Think divisions basically, like in any sport of today. The "amateur" clans would start off in an AM Series, before, if successful, graduating through the Semi Series and Pro Series. Only then would they have the opportunity to reach the top league in the game. And so, the top 16 clans in Tanki Online were to be placed into the elite league. The SLTV Star Series. SLTV has now run a whole two seasons, and let's face it, it's been a great success. Well-organised and entertaining in all circles, but most clearly in the StarSeries. Over the last two seasons, we have seen some unpredictable results, with the surprising fall of GGWP last Season most notable. With the fantastic final last season coming right down to the wire, the entertainment value of it is only rising and Season III so far has not let down. Quick context on rules. If you want to skip and just see the updates from this season, feel free to jump forwards. Basic set-up for the StarSeries this season is pretty much the same as last season. 6 players per team, Railguns only with 1 Smoky allowed maximum in each team. Wasp, Hornet, Hunter and Viking were the legitimate hulls for the Railguns, whilst the Smoky was only allowed to ride on Wasp or Hornet. As for paints, all were allowed as long as the maximum Railgun-protection of a team mounted to 100% maximum. Welll, I say all WERE allowed. Just over a week ago, the Russian CS Team announced that Savanna would no longer be allowed in battles. This meant re-shuffling line-ups and for many teams, completely new tactics as the previously-common 5 Hunters per team would no longer be as effective. There were, however, a few differences this season. Of course, there were newly-promoted teams from the ProSeries as normal but instead of a 4-out-4-in basis as had happened during Seasons I and II, SLTV wiped out the 6 bottom teams of StarSeries Season II and replaced them by 2 teams promoted from the ProSeries, to bring the amount of teams in the top league down from 16 to 12. This would mean that the league would not only have more quality but also that rather than having a team only play each of the other teams once, they would be able to do so twice. So, although the amount of teams in the StarSeries was reduced, the amount of games were raised from 120 to 132 and teams were set for a more intense schedule. StarSeries describes there as two stages in each season. The "Online Part" and The "Finals". The Online Part is, quite simply, the league. All twelve teams take part. This season, each match would be decided in four ten-minute rounds in a single chosen map. The map would be chosen by the opposing leaders from six stalwart XP Maps (Barda, Tribute, Red Alert, Bridges, Parma, Kungur) and one slightly more uncoventional choice, Forest. Each round won by a team in the map is added to the final score and if they won more rounds, they would gain 3 Points in the League. If an equal number of rounds were won by each team, then both teams would earn 1 Point as a draw, whilst a losing team would gain 0 Points. Just think of a football league like the La Liga or Premier League basically. Same sort of system. If you fancy looking at all of the rules for the StarSeries, just head over the "Rules" Page here on Starladder and feel free to read it all. SO FAR... So, now we get down to the real business. Time to look at what's happened so far in the Season. So, twelve teams this year. Arcade, the holders and eGuards, the runners-up, went into the Season as the two favourites to once again challenge for the title. The other teams were A&D who had taken third place last season; Dawn of War consistently impressive in Season II; Can't Stop, finalists in both previous seasons; as well as All In, CHAOS, Psychos.Pro, Arm Pride, GGWP and the new boys on the block, Armada and Wood's. Serious competition awaited us. The first week kicked off in late January as players excitedly watched to see who would emerge as the clan to beat. The first real event of the season happened just a week after the series began when Can't Stop came up against holders Arcade, and held out 2-1 to give Arcade their first defeat since back in Season I. Worth watching. You can see the full match here (with Russian commentary). Many players started to wonder whether Arcade would crumble under the pressure of the defeat, such was the shock of losing. What about other teams? Well, both the promoted teams were struggling against the experience of StarSeries-tuned teams, but time was taking its toll on some of the StarSeries teams too, with CHAOS who had held out for 10th position in both of the previous seasons immediately struggling against the firepower of the teams around them. A&D, who had had a fantastic season previously also didn't get off to the start they wanted with a crushing defeat to Dawn of War on the first day, before losing to Psychos who were showing off lots of class with some early victories. The unpredictableness of the season began to show through the day after Arcade's defeat as DoW who had beaten eGuards and Arm Pride confidently in consecutive days came up against Psychos and got obliterated 4-0, keeping Psychos' win-streak going. With their brilliant finish in fourth last season and unfortunately due to financial reasons being unable to attend the Finals, they were all the more eager on the hunt for a top-4 finish again, but clearly had some work to do. All In, who also had had a great start to Season III with three confident victories, came up against Arm Pride again just a couple of weeks after defeating them and were crushed 4-0 in an unexpected result. Arm Pride would then go on to lose their next two matches, including a disappointing loss to new team, ARMADA. Meanwhile, the runners-up from both Season I and Season II were having rusty starts. GGWP were more expected to come up short after a capitulation in Season II, but eGuards who had impressed so much in the previous season were seen coming up short in a number of matches included a 0-0 draw with Wood's, who were improving quickly after their dreadful start to the campaign. Holders Arcade had recovered well. They confidently despatched fellow Finals-challengers Psychos 4-0, and were flying high. However, due to "technical problems" to do with not removing a player for lag reasons, they were charged with defeat against A&D, a decision still being contested. However, putting that behind them, they came up against Can't Stop just last Sunday, their nemesis from just a couple of weeks before, and managed to grab a 2-0 Victory on the last Sunday where Savanna was allowed in StarSeries (English Commentary avaliable if you're interested in watching this one). However, Arcade accidentally used three "Digitals" in the last round of the battle, breaking the rules. In note of this, they offered Can't Stop a replay for the final round, which Arcade managed to win again a couple of days ago. And, with eGuards and A&D stuttering coming into late February, the top 4 was still wide open. As for the bottom, GGWP were still struggling. Although they had confidently beaten the newcomers, that was not going to be enough to steer clear of relegation trouble, and they had not shown enough against the more experienced teams. After all, do bear in mind that the four bottom teams from 9th position downwards all face the risk of getting relegated at the end of the season, with the bottom two having an automatic relegation whilst the higher couple have the chance of staying alive with a post-season playoff with a couple of ProSeries clans. Meanwhile, CHAOS were having the definition of a dreadful season with a 4-0 Defeat to Wood's summing up their season - 10 Games and no points to show for it. With nearly half of the season gone, it'll take one serious turn-around for them to stay up now. On the other hand, there were bright sparks at the bottom, especially for Wood's who just yesterday managed to despatch of their fellow "newbies" Armada in a wholly convincing 4-0 Victory. After a slow start, their training has shown a clear improvement and they are quickly rising up the table. So, the table is open at the moment. Arcade predictably are at the top, but a surprising appearance from Psychos near the top shows their clear intentions this season, whilst Can't Stop are also way up there, whilst having a couple of games in hand. Can't Stop and Arcade should be able to grab two of those top four positions with the way they've been playing, but apart from that, it's still very much open to see who can grab those "Finals" positions. For the full list of results so far in the campaign, just click the link here to view. And to view all the games so far this season commentated on in English, click the link here. Table on 27th Feb: (You can view the Updated Table by looking here) INTERVIEWS Well, what's the purpose of an update without getting some inside-information and interviewing those closely involved with the StarSeries? After hunting around for people to take part, I was helpfully directed to two famous veterans, and was thankfully able to ask them a few questions! Holy_hero_alexxxxx Leader and Smoky for eGuards, runners-up of StarSeries Season II Me: What do you believe was the reason for eGuards' success last season? Holy_hero_alexxxxx: In the past season, skill played a very important part in the game, more so than using successful combinations, I think. Yep. Have you found there to be any particular challenges for your team so far this season? The main problem this season has been the 5-Hunters set-up which the enemy teams have used. We would like to play with "nicer" combinations and we lost some points because of this, when we could have used the same "5-Hunters" set-up and won. I see. So with the news out that Savanna will no longer be allowed in battles, thus counting the 5-Hunters set-up useless, what will be your preferred line-up? I think, after this change, most teams would play with 3 Hunters and 3 Hornets and we will not be any different) Sure. What team have you found the most difficult to play against so far this season? I cannot single out someone, because virtually all took the same set-up and played equally well ) The second part of this season will be more beautiful, I'm sure) I hope so. As leader of your clan, who do you rate as the best player in eGuards? Each in his own is good) I can't comprehensively pick out anyone ) Good choice)) Well, what are you hoping for in the second half of this season? I hope that everyone will get what they deserved with their beautiful game) Haha. And as for eGuards? Would we get to the final 4 - I don't know, will see) But I am sure that we will play better than now, especially without 5-Hunters setup) Great! Good luck to your clan, and I really appreciate you taking part in this interview! Thank you so much! And you too) Thank you) You_aLways_Iose Tanki Veteran and Member of Arcade, formerly known as "CRAZIER" Me: As an old player who played in clans before Starladder in Tanki, how do you feel about the change to Starladder? You_aLways_Iose: Well I think that Starladder offered Tanki some organisation in Cyber-Sports , something that didn't exist. For example, before Starladder took charge only Russian teams/clans had the chance to win the Champion or the Acid paint... Now all the clans from all the communities have this chance. So for me Starladder is better.. Too right. What do you think was the key to Arcade's success in the last couple of seasons? Our players. All of us have participated in many tournaments, so we have enough experience each of us to understand how to play the game , what we need to do in the map, where to stay and all the things that you know... and when we forget something we have our captain I.Shomaa to tell us what we have to do. Experienced players can think better how to face some situations than the "rookies" : D.... Good point... Well, as a member of Arcade, is there anyone in the clan you think is the best player or you particularly look up to? That's a tough question... but i don't think there is someone who is the best in our clan.. We all are very skilled players, but you know everybody makes mistakes sometimes.The player that I was looking up to isn't playing this game anymore, so right now I don't have someone that makes me think he can do something that I can't do.. Sure. Well, what clan have you been most impressed with so far this season? Of course with Psychos.Pro. In Star Series Season 2 , they finished 7th and now they are in 2nd place,trying to overtake the league. In start i couldn't believe that those guys were in 1st place and i thought that they just have won some bad clans and taking easy points.. but then they started to beat good clans like DoW and eGuards , so I started to take them with another look. I watched some of their games and i realized that they were a good clan, which I am sure it will be in the TOP-4 this season instead of eGuards. The outsider of this season is Psychos.Pro. Yeah, they've done a great job. So, with that in mind, who are you predicting to qualify for the Finals this season? For the finals I am sure we are gonna have Can't Stop, Psychos, DoW and of course Arcade : :) Interesting choices! So what is Arcade's aims for the rest of the season? We have some good games to play yet with clans like DoW, All In, eGuards and we want to win those games in order to give us the 1st place. Now for the playoffs I think we have a lot of time until then, but our aim like the two seasons before is to win the Star Series again :) Okay. All the best and I'm sure many of your fans will hope the same! Thanks so much for the interview! Nah , I am very happy that I could take part in this :) . And for our fans, we want to thank them for all for their support and belief that they showed us :) . Keep up the good work hogree ;) GoldRock Ex-Reporter and Ex-Commentator for the English Community Me: What's your verdict so far at the halfway stage of the competition? Any clans that have impressed / unimpressed you? And any predictions for the end of the season? Gold: Well, I haven't played Tanki itself since I left to take a break to focus on my studies and so on, but I have been following the action unfolding in the current Star Series Season III as an ex-commentator (hopefully something I could return to in the summer!). And the following is basically my own analysis based on what I've seen, heard and researched for myself, during the few idle spare minutes I've had on my hands every so often ^_^ So far, ARCADE and Can't Stop seem to be the major teams from last Season's finals to be performing particularly strongly. ARCADE have only one loss in the bag (they managed to get through this stage of the last season without a single loss), with Can't Stop having one recent draw - all the rest of their matches have been wins. Looking forward to seeing them duel for that top spot later in the season. I think A&D, a finalist from the previous Season, is a team to look out for based on their recent performance - they've held eGuards and Can't Stop to a draw, edged it over a weakened GGWP, and managed to beat ARCADE, albeit down to Arcade's rule-break in using a lagging player. In doing so, they're single-handedly responsible for ending the win-only runs of both ARCADE and Can't Stop. Their previous results have been largely mixed, meaning they're in a solid mid-table position which disguises their more recent strength. Speaking of GGWP, ever since they signed that contract, they've not been able to repeat the success they had when formerly known as Scorpions. They finished a pretty disappointing 9th last season and it looks like they're on track to do something similar this time round. I've heard they lost a fair few of their squad members to competing teams - to ARCADE in particular - and it seems this has weakened then beyond repair. They're no longer a real contender or a team to watch. In addition to the potential competition between ARCADE and Can't Stop for first place, I think the next level of the competition will involve DoW, All In, PSYCHOS and eGuards battling it out for third and fourth place, in order to try and make this Season's finals. DoW has had a majority of wins so far with some impressive performances, whereas PSYCHOS have managed to surprise and impress as the underdogs here. Having finished 7th last season and slipping under the radar as a newer Star Series team, they're currently sitting in 1st place with only a couple of losses, though they have played more matches than most. However, their wins have often been close-run and they really got steamrollered by ARCADE - their relative lack of experience holds then back from that main 1st-place-finish race, in my opinion. All In, who disappointed last Season after a strong first Season performance, really haven't played many matches at all - but they're still in a decent mid-placed position. However, it's not like they've had a run of easy matches either, as they've managed to overcome DoW and eGuards whilst narrowly losing to PSYCHOS, which puts them in a good position for their future matches. And eGuards, hanging in 5th and the remaining finalist (and the runner-up to ARCADE) from the last Season, have enjoyed some moderate success though with a real mixture of wins and losses against both stronger and weaker opponents, drawing on numerous occasions. However, they possess consistency in terms of their performance - something that means they have a decent chance of another top-4 finish this time round. Looking further down the table, ARM PRIDE have disappointed despite a good showing last Season, when they nearly made the finals. A handful of weaker teams bring up the rear, with poor CHAOS having lost every single one of their matches so far. They really are living up to their name as they suffer defeat after humiliating defeat. That's a Reporter's answer for you... Summed it up nicely! Well, the English Cybersport team has only managed to stream four games so far this season. Will we expect any more and how will we know when they will be streamed? Of course you should expect more streams in the future, what with our very own Wabbit recently taking the reins as admin (and doing a brilliant job as expected whilst settling into his new role), and a new voice, Arabiannoble, joining the team. Generally, streams are announced on the day with an in-game notification. Keep an eye out for them, they're certainly entertaining this Season! Thanks Gold! Can't wait! You're welcome, it was a pleasure :) AND MORE... Season III isn't nearly over yet. There's still piles more of action to watch this month! Below are my picks from a packed fixture list. All matches will be streamed on the Russian Cybersport Channel, and as we just heard, some on the English Cybersport Channel as well! The Season finishes on the 27th of March, before the Finals begin. I'm gunning for Dawn of War this season, but what about you? Will Arcade win for the third successive time? Will Psychos hold on to their great start to get to the Top 4 for the first time? Will eGuards recover to re-gain their top 4 spot? Will Chaos have a turnaround or will one of the newcomers be staying up? Find it all out this month! Links are below, and but here goes: 15 Games not to miss this month! Sat 28th February - Arcade vs eGuards 16:00 GMT Wed 4th March - Arm Pride vs Arcade 18:00 GMT Fri 6th March - Can't Stop vs Dawn of War 16:00 GMT Sat 7th March - Psychos vs All In 17:00 GMT Thu 12th March - Arcade vs Dawn of War 18:00 GMT Fri 13th March - Armada vs Wood's 16:00 GMT Sat 14th March - Arm Pride vs Can't Stop 16:00 GMT Wed 18th March - Dawn of War vs Can't Stop 16:00 GMT Fri 20th March - Can't Stop vs eGuards 16:00 GMT Sat 21st March - A&D vs Arm Pride 15:00 GMT Sun 22nd March - Wood's vs GGWP 15:00 GMT Sun 22nd March - Dawn of War vs Psychos 18:00 GMT Fri 27th March [Last Day] - All In vs Can't Stop 16:00 GMT Fri 27th March - Psychos vs Arcade 17:00 GMT Fri 27th March - GGWP vs eGuards 18:00 GMT For FULL list of fixtures, view here! All matches will be streamed on the Russian Twitch Channel. However, some will hopefully, as GoldRock expressed, be streamed on the English Twitch Channel. Missed any games? Just head over to the Russian Tanki Starladder Youtube Channel to catch up with Highlights or even the Full Match! Also, it may be worth checking the English Tanki Starladder Youtube Channel as well in case there was English Commentary on the match! Bring on the second half of Season III! Stay tuned - next month in the paper, we'll have the final results as the top four are finally decided!

Oh boy. When there are no comedy shows on the BBC, I normally take a trek over to EN3. Great banter.

TOPIC UPDATED! February Resolution to update twice a month is well underway. Woohoo. Not so many birthdays to reel out, but yeah. Oh, and Eating Chicken managed to get 100 likes before this. unfair huh. Hint hint. And credit to JohnathanFerrell :rolleyes: - now three months are completed! Come on guys! Happy Belated Birthday to The.wendeta, worldcrafter1, Truthteller, pizzaslad, 13redteamleader, gogavsgio, parth9jr, eruptiondude, blacksunshine, BuddyGuy, Yetio24, NuclearBomb, ashifrebolt, WE_ARE_THE_BEST_EVER, 327250, craefulmatthewtomas, Sgt.Shultz, such_1, sky218, x-copper-x, a.k.m, omar, JonathanBernatowicz, vijayb, toanaparu_GT, nocando, SOMEBODY_online, Montano00, TankControllerxXx, Mrs.Dreyar, MagisTor and Indian_Tanker! Happy Birthday for tomorrow to waterboy567! And... favourite three names from the birthdays of this update! 1. 2. @BuddyGuy 3. Keep Posting!

plez yus

That hull brings a new meaning to the word "BEAST". Looks amazing... That turret is genius! Awesome!

definite giggling bruv fdrty7urftyyery

Hi DS. Thanks for your reply. I now understand what you say regarding the purpose of the contest. However, it does leave me curious as to your differentiation between commentators aspiring for Starladder commentary and those who you chose, such as the third position. Surely, the best commentators would be the ones who are best on the big stage, forgetting the purpose even. All the same, I won't Dispute. Just putting across that even though you say you werent aiming for Starladder commentators it doesn't change that the decisions still seem to have the wrong priorities. But it does come down to your choice. As for arabianoble and DuckHonk, I would suggest that's a bad precedent. Changing your opinion now on that only leaves your decision for the top three, already dubious, to be more fiercely contended.

u wot m8

Vulcan is fantastic! Well done Tanki! Basic tips: -Vulcan turns fast when you're not shooting. -When you begin shooting, Vulcan stays where your turret is pointing. Thus, if you turn your tank while shooting, not turning your turret, the turret will auto-turn to face its original direction. So, simply, hold your spacebar so you dont have to re-charge, move your tank into the correct position, then turn your turret.

legend